l Page 7422 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Last Minute Christmas Gift Ideas For The Lazy And Insane
Christmas is two days away and you've done zero shopping; nice going, jerk. Fortunately it's not too late to surprise the kids with Inflatable Ben Wallace, the basketball defender aide....

That's Why The Lady Is A Champ
Your new "female" Long-Drive Champ: "This is who I am. This is my life. That other person, that 245-pound SWAT cop I used to be, he's gone. He's not coming back." [Golf Week]...

Merciful Jesus May Be Ready To End Teixeira Drama
Mark Teixeira supposedly about to sign with someone, but no ones knows with whom, or for how much. So let's pretend it's the Mets. [SI.com]...

Sweet, Cold Chicago
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Is Brian Baldinger's Mangled Digit Growing A Face?
Brian Baldinger's permanently dislocated little finger has been well documented by many, many people since he first started appearing on national television as an NFL analyst....

Do Not Challenge Shaun Ellis To A Snowball Fight
Here's one more little tidbit, from the winter wonderland that was Week 16 in the NFL....

Junior Seau Is Not As Quick As He Used To Be
We know that networks don't like to show bad fan behavior for fear of copycats, but we really need to see video of the idiot that tackled Junior Seau on the sidelines yesterday. [Vent]...

The Year In ... Cheerleading
So, the next nine days will be chock full of end-of-year retrospectives. We'll do our own as well. Today: Cheerleaders....

An Internet Protest Will Change Everything!
• Oh, right. The losing: Wow, all those Ottawa Senators bloggers are upset about something. I have no idea what it could be though. [Scarlett Ice]...

Brian Urlacher's Kooky Baby Mama Heads To Prison
Tyna Robertson, the lovely mother of Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher's son, was arrested by Cook County sheriff's police after she missed a court date. [Chicago Breaking News]...

Brady Quinn's Beautiful Face May Have Been Damaged
Rumors are flying around Cleveland about a possible altercation between Browns defensive lineman Shaun Smith and quarterback Brady Quinn....

The Year In...Sports Fella
So, the next nine days will be chock full of end-of-year retrospectives. We'll do our own as well. Today: Bill Simmons...

Celtics Sign Usain Bolt, Just Because They Can
The Celtics have won 18 games in row. Gulp. One more would be a franchise record and the best start in NBA history. Yikes. Even a blizzard and the Mass Turnpike can't stop this team. They're so hot right now that they caused global warming. Ok, I made one of those up. [Globe + ESPN]...

Soccer: Only The Manliest Of Men Need Apply
OK, so we've had a good time this month making fun of soccer. But do we really think soccer is gay? No way. And this video only reinforces that belief....

What Hockey Really Needs Is Better Manners
Ok, technically, using this spin-o-rama move on a penalty/shootout shot is not illegal—because it explicitly says so in the rule book. (Seriously, the NHL rule book contains the word "spin-o-rama." Amazing.) So it's fair ... but is it nice? The Devils' Bobby Holik doesn't think so....

Seahawks Fans Confused By Cold, Flaky Discharge From Sky
Hmm, I have a feeling that his beer isn't the only thing that's frosty cold. Welcome to Seattle's Qwest Field on Sunday, where the snow even caught the SeaGals cheerleaders unprepared. [Busted Coverage]...

Teixeira May Be Running Out Of Teams
Mark Teixeira's obvious path to becoming a Washington National came closer to reality on Sunday, when the Angels announced that they were withdrawing their offer to keep him around....

SHOTY Final Four Is Set
Congratulations to our four finalists in the 2008 Sportshuman of the Year tournament. They've all earned it, in their own way....

The Curious Case Of Britt Barefoot
Do you think Britt Barefoot really wanted to be a kicker or was he simply forced into it because of his all-too appropriate last name?...

The Few, The Proud, The Phillies Ball Girls
After a grueling tryout process, which included a written test, the Phillies have whittled down more than a thousand applicants to select their 2009 ball girls. Oh happy day!...