league Page 247 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Minor-League Team Wins Championship On Walk-Off Balk, Goes Freaking Crazy
The Eugene (Ore.) Emeralds are the Cubs’ Class A short-season affiliate, and this year they’ve earned the nickname the Bad News Ems by having the Northwest League’s worst overall record. But in the Northwest League, you can qualify for the postseason based on your second-half record, and the Emerald...
The Stadium Scam Goes Minor-League, And It Has An Unlikely Ally
When the state of Rhode Island offered up $38 million in June to the owners of the Triple-A Pawtucket Red Sox toward a new stadium, it seemed likely to be the first step on the road to a replacement for the beloved-but-modern-kitchenless 76-year-old McCoy Stadium. Sure, the PawSox owners had balked ...
Usain Bolt Is A Soccer Player Now And He's Actually Not Terrible
Usain Bolt may have retired from track, but he hasn’t given up sports entirely. He is currently signed to a trial contract with the Central Coast Mariners, an Australia A-League team, trying to realize his dream of becoming a pro soccer player. He made his official debut in a preseason friendly last...
Here Is The Champions League Group Stage Draw
The group stage draw for this year’s Champions League tournament was just completed this morning, and now it is time to find out which teams have been unfairly boned and which teams were clearly the beneficiaries of a rigged lottery....
Why Don't More Soccer Teams Scoop Up Easy Goals From Cool Free-Kick Routines Like This?
PAOK scored the first goal of their Champions League qualifying match against a superior Benfica team off of a neat little coordinated free-kick routine. Watch the goal above, because it’s cool, and then ponder the following: What is it about free goals that have the big tough soccer boys afraid of ...
Whenever José Mourinho Faces Pressure, He Brings Up A World Crisis
On Monday, Manchester United manager José Mourinho stormed out of a press conference after his squad fell to Tottenham, 3-0. “3-0,” he said. “But also mean, three Premierships, and I’ve won more Premierships alone than the other 19 managers together.” He kept saying “respect” as he walked off stage....
Lucas Moura Cooking Chris Smalling Is A Metaphor For Tottenham's Spanking Of Man United
It takes a firm lashing of José Mourinho’s asscheeks to get him to walk into a press conference and opine about international humanitarian crises before storming out of the room while doing an unironic Birdman impression, and that’s exactly what Tottenham administered to Mourinho’s Manchester United...
Jose Mourinho Storms Out Of Press Conference, Appears To Be Losing It
Tottenham crushed Manchester United with a comprehensive 3-0 victory at Old Trafford this afternoon, handing the Red Devils their second loss out of the first three Premier League games. United manager Jose Mourinho—who’s coming off a tumultuous offseason and has a tendency to see his clubs implode ...
DeAndre Yedlin Assists On Newcastle Equalizer (Yay), Scores Chelsea Game-Winner (Oof)
DeAndre Yedlin—just too old to be considered one of the American wonderkids, but still a promising youth—played a crucial role in Chelsea’s 2–1 victory over Newcastle Sunday, scoring the decisive goal in the 88th minute to punctuate a dominant Chelsea performance. Tragically, Yedlin plays for Newcas...
Scammy Champions Basketball League Gets Humiliated In Court, Drops Lawsuit, Continues To Fall Apart
It’s been just over a year since we first reported on the trials and tribulations of the Champions Basketball League, a semi-pro league that used false promises to bilk hundreds of thousands of dollars out of investors who were sold on the opportunity to own a piece of a basketball team full of form...
Adama Traoré, The King Of Dribbles, Is Just Getting Started
The new European soccer season has only just begun and we’ve already seen Adama Traoré strengthen his claim on the “best dribbler in the world” crown....
Paul Pogba's Agent Shit-Talks Man United Legend, And Things Are Looking Bad
Following Manchester United for the couple years, it’s hard to combat the sense that Paul Pogba isn’t very happy at the club right now. But for as up-and-down as his return to England has been, it seems like right now—with his manager criticizing him and the team playing poorly and unadventurously a...
Only José Mourinho Can Save Manchester United From Himself
If he weren’t such a hemorrhoidal asshole, you could be inclined to feel somewhat sorry for José Mourinho....
This Is A Rough Little League Injury
A 77 MPH Little League fastball might not be equivalent to a 100 MPH major-league fastball, but a pitch to the crotch is painful at any level of baseball....
Andrés Iniesta Has Moved To Japan And Become A Golazo-Scoring Fiend
They say you can’t teach old dogs new tricks. They also say there is always one exception that proves any given rule. I don’t really know what to do with these two chestnuts but they seem relevant to the fact that Andrés Iniesta has moved to Japan and apparently transformed into Lionel Messi....
Liverpool's Low-Key Smashing Of West Ham Was A Statement Of Intent
The first game of a season that for the first time in forever feels like it might end with the long-awaited Premier League title. A match against, on paper, one of the strongest teams in the division. A home opener in what is probably the most raucous stadium in the country. A chance to put together...
Minor League Baseball Team Wins On A Three-Run Walk-Off Uncaught Third Strike<em></em>
Minor league baseball is nuts, man. The Burlington Bees had already bled two runs to the Wisconsin Timber Rattlers in the bottom of the ninth of Friday’s Class-A game, but they still had two outs and two strikes against batter Nic Pierre with the bases loaded. The Timber Rattlers’ left fielder struc...
Paul Pogba's Weirdo Penalty Is The First Premier League Goal Of The Season
At the start of a game that probably shouldn’t be played right now (I mean really, the World Cup ended less than a month ago for chrissakes, don’t these guys deserve some rest?), a player that probably shouldn’t be playing (Paul Pogba had a big role in that World Cup right up till the end, you might...
Luke Heimlich Signs With Taiwanese Baseball Team, League Kicks Him Out
On Monday, the defending champion Lamigo Monkeys of the Chinese Professional Baseball League announced that they had signed former Oregon State pitcher Luke Heimlich, who pleaded guilty to molesting his 6-year-old niece in 2012. Heimlich was probably a first-round talent, but he was not drafted by a...
Vlad Guerrero Jr. Is Healthy And Back To Mashing Taters In The Minors<em></em>
Good news for anyone deeply troubled by the mid-season injury of Blue Jays prospect Vladimir Guerrero Jr: He’s back, he got called up to Triple-A at the end of July, and he’s still belting the ball in that same heroic way we’ve enjoyed all year....