league Page 248 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Best Dribbler In The World Is Back In The Premier League
The best, most unstoppable dribbler in world soccer will be playing in the Premier League this season. Though it’s probably not the player you think....
Extremely Not-Desperate Chelsea Break The Bank To Sign Their Second-Choice Keeper
The very gloomy outlook for Chelsea’s upcoming Premier League season just got a little bit brighter, albeit at a hefty cost. The Blues welcomed a new goalkeeper to the club today in Athletic Bilbao’s Kepa Arrizabalaga, who pretty understandably just goes by “Kepa” most of the time. Kepa’s price tag,...
Two Pirates Minor Leaguers Hit For The Cycle In The Same Game
Here’s something improbable: two minor league teammates in the Pirates system hit for the cycle Tuesday night, in the same game. Kevin Newman got his in five at-bats, notching a single, a pair of doubles, a triple, and finally, in the eighth inning, a solo dong to left:...
Here Are 10 Minutes Of The Finest Soccer Passes From Last Season
The Premier League season starts this weekend. It’s been like four seconds since the World Cup ended. Regardless, that’s exciting news....
This Could Be A Very Bad Season For Chelsea
Recent history tells us that 2018-19 is going to be a good year for Chelsea. Over the past four seasons, the Blues have see-sawed back and forth between amazing, Premier League–winning seasons and disastrously disappointing years in which unmotivated players coast through 38 games. With a fifth-plac...
The Best Sports Of The Night Is These Dogs Licking Peanut Butter
This has been an especially draining news day, and the most prominent sporting event tonight is *shudders* the MLS All-Star Game, so the time has come to look at some dogs. Please, appreciate the innocence and enthusiasm of these good boys named Bentley and Charlie, who both like peanut butter very ...
A Two-Win Team Won The Arena Football League Title
The Washington Valor won the ArenaBowl on Saturday night, beating the Baltimore Brigade, 69-55, to capture the 31st title of the Arena Football League. Arvell Nelson led the way for the Valor with five rushing touchdowns and three TDs through the air. ...
Daniel Poncedeleon Will Make His Major League Debut 14 Months After A Horrifying Injury
Cardinals pitcher Daniel Poncedeleon will be called up by St. Louis today and start tonight’s game against the Reds, making his big-league debut little more than a year after an injury suffered on the mound put his career—and maybe his life—in jeopardy. “Talk about a comeback story,” new Cards manag...
If When You Do What Is Right And Suffer For It You Patiently Endure It, This Finds Favor With God; Tim Tebow Lands On Disabled List
Future Mets savior—and possible capital-S Savior—Tim Tebow landed on the disabled list Saturday after suffering a hand injury earlier in the week. Per a WBNG report:...
Two Umpires Suspended After Teaming Up To Make Worst Call In History
A Mexican League game between the Diablos Rojos del México and the Algodoneros de Union Laguna on July 18 produced one of the most shocking umpiring errors in the history of the game. In the top of the first inning, umpires Ulises Domínguez Solís and Rodolfo Pastrana Tejeda somehow both determined t...
Soccer Player Blows Off Some Steam By Drop-Kicking Opponent In The Stomach
Sometimes, in the late stages of a certain loss in a big game, a soccer player might boot the ball with an unnecessarily strong kick in an effort to physically expel some of their inner frustration. No problem, you see it all the time. Less common—and less forgivable—is deciding that your discontent...
Liverpool Spend Truckload Of Money To Prevent Further Loris Karius Boners
Liverpool are rolling in Champions League cash after that surprisingly successful 2017-18 campaign, and they’ve proven yet again that they’re not shy about spending it. Today the Reds appear to have completed a deal with Roma for the Brazilian goalkeeper Alisson, paying the hysterical price of €75m ...
Arsène Wenger: Oh God, What Was I Doing At Arsenal For The Last 22 Years?
Pretty much the entire back half of manager Arsène Wenger’s 22-year tenure with Arsenal could be forgotten with little consequence. After winning a couple titles and then going unbeaten in the 2003-04 Premier League season, Wenger’s accomplishments quickly thinned—a mix of third- and fourth-place fi...
Collin Sexton's Summer League Crunch Time Defense Is Maybe Too Intense
Josh Hart and Collin Sexton had what looks like a decent duel in the semifinals of the NBA Summer League tournament last night. Hart went off for 37 points and nine rebounds in the Lakers’ 2OT win (nothing is more conceptually absurd than Summer League overtime), while Sexton had 27 points for the C...
Everton Really Fucked Up This Fifth-Division Team, 22-0
Everton decided to take on a fifth-division Austrian team, ATV Irdning, ostensibly because they were the closest 11 sentient beings in the area. The offseason friendly took place in Austria, where Everton have a training ground in picturesque Bad Mitterndorf, a few miles up the road from the home...
Pole Vaulter Nearly Makes Shish Kebab Of His Dick And Balls
At the IAAF Rabat Diamond League track meet in Morocco today, pole vaulter Timur Morgunov’s pole skewered the front of his shorts. His dangly bits narrowly and luckily remained intact....
The Short, Dramatic Tenure Of Antonio Conte At Chelsea Might Finally Be Over<em></em>
The lengthy offseason limbo of Chelsea manager Antonio Conte appears to be nearing a resolution, as the BBC is reporting that an official announcement on Conte’s departure from the club is imminent. This tweet from Chelsea midfielder Cesc Fàbregas appears to give it away, too....
Get Robert Williams A Damn Wallet Chain
Celtics rookie Robert Williams, who is still figuring stuff out, now has one extremely clear agenda item: Remember the physical location of his wallet....
Summer League Is Only Good For Getting Unreasonably Excited About Duncan Robinson
Have you heard about the NBA’s biggest signing of the summer? Clearly I am referring to the new two-way contract that former Michigan Wolverine Duncan Robinson has signed with the Miami Heat. ...