lockout-with-your-cockout - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Patrick Kane Is Living It Up In Switzerland With His Mom We already knew that Patrick Kane was playing hockey in Switzerland during the NHL lockout, thanks to his appearance in this Swiss hellscape. But what we didn't know is that Kane, the notorious party boy, is currently living in Switzerland with his mom. His real-life mom!...

NBA Owners And Players Reach Tentative Labor Deal, Season To Start On Christmas Day"All I feel right now is 'finally'" said a borderline speechless Dwyane Wade. Barring something crazy, the league plans on opening training camp on December 9th and kicking off a 66-game schedule Christmas Day with the Boston Celtics at New York Knicks, the Miami Heat at Dallas Mavericks, and the Ch...

The Theme Of Last Night's NLCS Game Was Set When Jerry Hairston Got Bucknered At Third Your morning roundup for Oct. 15, the day we totally realized that Tums commercial with a randy corn dog is really a work of dong-involved artistry. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Would You Kill A Stranger To Save Football?

Last week, I went to the gym and went inside the locker room to change before I worked out (POWER LIFTING GRRR STRONG!), and when I went to pull my gym clothes out of the bag a pair of my kid's underwear went flying out of the bag onto the floor. They had gotten there by accident during laundry fold...

The Bizarre Cult Of Pro-Owner NFL Fanboys

Here's a tidy summation of how we've managed to get to where we are with the NFL lockout. A few years ago, the players and owners agreed to a new CBA, with only Ralph Wilson and Mike Brown voting against the agreement, in Wilson's case because he's old and easily confused by things....

It's Only A Matter Of Time Before An NFL Team's Financials Are Leaked

Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Here's What Confused NFL Players Are Doing This Morning

Showing up to work out, some of them. Except not really working out. And the ones that arrived are either union guys checking the lay of the land, or players openly concerned about their workout bonuses. Mostly, players walked in, hung around for a couple of minutes then went home. Everyone's pretty...