los Page 264 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Yes...
Boy, that escalated quickly. Wasn't it just last week when the sports pundits and the soundbite intelligentsia were all speculating that former Los Angeles Clipper, and free agent whale, Elton Brand, would "probably" ignore the lavish offer sheet from the Golden State Warriors because "he loves L.A....

Aaron Rowand Is The Illusionist
Well, the All-Star rosters are complete, except for one spot on each team. Internet voting to determine those last two spots ends on Thursday at 2 p.m. PST, and Aaron Rowand of the San Francisco Giants would like your vote. Following the jump you will find his campaign video. The action is from Frid...

How Will Yankees Fans Greet A-Rod Tonight?
Thank God for the Yankees that their next series with Boston is in New York. With a separation from wife Cynthia and rumors of canoodling with Madonna thicker than Newman's Own Thousand Island dressing, Alex Rodriguez must have more on his mind than Jonathan Papelbon. But how will his own fans greet...

There's Nothing More Annoying Than A Rays Fan With A Cowbell
OK, first of all, Cowbell Kid may seem pretty impressive when he's among his own in Tropicana Field, but I'd like to see him tearing down banners and clanging his bell at Fenway ... or Yankee Stadium, for that matter. Can Cowbell Kid win on the road? That's the question. As for the Rays, they've ans...

The Baron Of Clipperland
Baron Davis will do anything for love, but he won't do that. And by "that" I mean "be low-balled by the Golden State Warriors." Even if it means jumping ship and joining his hometown Clippers....

Rays, Red Sox Let Us All Down, Fail To Brawl
So what happened to Jonathan Papelbon's prediction of fisticuffs and other mayhem when the Red Sox returned to Tropicana Field? No brushbacks or punches or obscene gestures ... all we got was some lame identity theft. Rays manager Joe Maddon spent much of Monday trying to cancel his debiit card, whi...

Jelena Jankovic Not Doing Any Splits After Today's Performance
Not a good week for highly-ranked Serbian women, as third-ranked superstar Jelena Jankovic went down in the fourth round this morning at Wimbledon. Jankovic, known for her salty toughness and her love of Lita Ford's wardrobe, was bounced by the 60th ranked player in early morning action....

We Who Are About To Die Salute You
The Cubs really don't have a reasonable explanation as to why they suck so relatively badly on the road. The White Sox beat the Cubs 5-1 on Sunday to complete a three-game sweep, the North side's eighth loss in the past 12 games. And here we see Mr. Kerry Wood trying to explain it, as you probably s...

Windy City Teams On Verge Of Trading Sweeps; Kerry Wood Not Pleased
Despite getting the catchy nickname of "One of the most consistent hitters in the game" by teammate Matt Murton, Aramis Ramirez failed to take advantage of a lead-off double in the 9th by Derrek Lee. With one out and Lee on third, Bobby Jenks forced the Cubbie into grounding out weakly to short when...

Sir Sidney Gives Up No Runs; Probably Ate Them All
Sidney Ponson made his unceremonious (only to Ponson, as ceremonious occasions usually have bacon gravy) return to the Yankees in the second half of a two-ballpark doubleheader yesterday with the cross-Gotham Mets. And he laid into them like they were an Aruban judge, tossing six shutout innings in ...

Shawn Chacon Is Now Looking For Work
Time is running out to claim Shawn Chacon on waivers! Act now, and you will receive one slightly used Major League pitcher, ERA just above 5.00, with a tendency to throttle when perturbed. Buy it now price: $2 million. Chacon was put on waivers Thursday by the Houston Astros, one day after and unfor...

Spanish Bombs
“Spanish bombs, yo te quiero infinito yo te quiero oh mi corazón Spanish bombs, yo te quiero infinito yo te quiero oh mi corazón” – “Spanish Bombs”, The Clash...

Look At Those Crazy Rays, And The Dead Fish
• Battered Fish. A 10-run inning? Wha? The Battle of Florida is not going well for the Marlins, as Tampa Bay enjoyed a 10-run, 14-batter, 32-minute fifth inning on its way to a 15-3 win. Carl Crawford had two homers and five RBI. Believe it or not, it wasn't a franchise record for the Rays, who once...

The Post Is Certain To Experience Technical Difficulties
“It's like how much more black could this be? And the answer is none, none more black.” – Nigel Tufnel...

Much Excitement In The Area Where The Allegheny And Monongahela Converge To Form The Ohio River
Wouldn't it be ironic — in a fun, cosmic sort of way — if the turning point for the Pittsburgh Pirates' franchise came on Tuesday night? It was the first time since 1960 that the New York Yankees had played in Pittsburgh, when, as you surely recall, Bill Mazeroski won Game 7 of the World Series with...

Is There Any Way Turkey Pulls Off The Upset?
Forgive me if my memory from that night in Frankfurt, Germany two years ago is a little hazy. It definitely included conversations with members of Germany’s Stampede Wrestling Federation. And yes, the Gypsy Kings, “Volare” blared over the speakers on repeat. There may or may not have been an appear...

Behold The Awesome Offensive Power Of American League Pitchers
Ha! Take that Hank Steinbrenner, you big dolt. Pitchers shouldn't hit? Felix Hernandez hit the first grand slam by an American League pitcher in 37 years, leading the Mariners over the Mets 5-2 on Monday night. Hernandez did get hurt; but not running the bases, as Steinbrenner imagines in his sweaty...

First Hillary, Then 'Sex And The City,' And Now This
In a pivotal evolutionary moment reminiscent of that scene in Jurassic Park where the Velociraptor figures out how to work the doorknob, Candace Parker of the Los Angeles Sparks threw one down in the waning seconds of a win over the Indiana Fever on Sunday. No, it wasn't the first dunk in WNBA histo...

Welcome To The Battle Of Chicago
Now that's what I'm talking about. This is how you do a rivalry, people. North Side vs. South Side, Ozzie vs. Lou. Plenty of trash talk. Copious amounts of Ryan Dempster. Let's get it on! When Round 1 was over on Sunday the Cubs had done it; swept the White Sox in the Friendly Confines. Round 2 comi...
