los Page 89 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
![Dammit, DeMarcus Cousins Tore His ACL [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/yah1gljw3ofscwkals7h.jpg)
Dammit, DeMarcus Cousins Tore His ACL [Update]
After suffering in obscurity on the worst team in pro sports for seven years, getting free from the mess in Sacramento only to tear his Achilles midway through a career season on a playoff-bound squad with another star, and seeing his chance at a ring go up in smoke thanks to a string of brutal inju...

Clayton Kershaw's Reinvention Makes The Dodgers Even Scarier
Clayton Kershaw looks like a completely different pitcher than he did several years and hundreds of innings ago, but the results are pretty much the same. With a two-hitter win against the Marlins on Wednesday, the Dodgers starter improved to 12-2 on the year with a 2.63 ERA, efficiently striking ou...

Josh Bell's Bloop Single Short-Circuited The Entire Angels Defense
It was all going just fine for the Angels. They had scored the opening four runs through the first two innings of their game on Tuesday against the Pirates, and, as far as anyone knew, their gloves and arms were all functioning properly, as they should on a professional baseball team. That all chang...

Carlos Vela Earns The Dubious Honor Of Being MLS's All-Time Highest-Scoring Mexican
With a deadlock-breaking goal from the penalty spot on Sunday in LAFC’s 4–2 win over the Red Bulls, Carlos Vela continued his season-long, Messi-like path of goal-induced destruction. The goal was his 23rd of the season, and his 37th overall in MLS, the latter stat making him the highest scoring Mex...

Antonio Brown Is Now Desperately Searching Twitter For The Helmet He Wants
Antonio Brown is due back at Raiders training camp today, following an extended absence that was caused by his accursed feet and his displeasure at no longer being able to wear the kind of helmet he prefers. Brown’s appeal to the NFL to allow him to go on wearing his old helmet failed, but that does...

The Fight Against The Los Angeles Olympics Isn't Over Yet
On a sweltering July morning in Los Angeles, the LA 2028 flags flew as “Mayor” Eric Garcetti stood on the steps of City Hall and cancelled The LA 2028 Olympic games. The games that he had insisted on were being called off, citing the absurd costs, impossibility of staging outdoor events due to clima...

As The Border Bled, Juárez Watched The Game It Waited Nine Years For
JUAREZ, MEXICO — On a scorching hot Sunday afternoon, as you walk through the parking lot of Estadio Olimpico Benito Juárez, you can feel the excitement. Nine long years have passed since the last time Juárez had a team in Mexico’s top soccer league. And now, Los Bravos of FC Juárez, are about to pl...

Uh Oh: This Meaningless NBA Ranking Has Kobe Bryant Fans, The Biggest Losers In The World, Up In Arms
In an effort to fill space in the period of the year when nothing’s going on in the world of basketball, NBA.com released its All-Decade teams for the 2010s era. Kobe Bryant was placed on the third All-Decade team, and this caused Kobe Bryant fans, possibly the most wretched group of people affiliat...

Let's Rebrand The Clippers
Steve Ballmer said he is open to renaming/rebranding his basketball team, which would be noble if the rest of the sentence read, “because the amoral pig who owned this before me turned the enterprise into a urinal and even shouting like a lunatic and bringing Jerry West and Kawhi Leonard on board do...

Arsenal Are Not Fucking Around This Summer
When Arsenal lost in the Europa League final, it felt like the Gunners were well and truly fucked. That defeat, coupled with a third-consecutive Premier League finish outside the top four, consigned Arsenal to life outside the Champions League for the third year running, presumably a massive setback...

Which Of The NFL's Five Holdouts Has The Most Leverage?
The NFL’s current collective bargaining agreement has largely made training camp holdouts a thing of the past. By codifying significant daily fines, docking a regular-season game check for each preseason game missed, and placing limitations on the accrual of service time toward free agency, this CB...

U.S. Soccer Releases Dubious Numbers To Refute Claims Of Pay Inequality
U.S. Soccer president Carlos Cordeiro released a letter and accompanying fact sheet Monday evening intended to demonstrate that his federation invests more heavily in women’s soccer than it does in men’s. The purpose here is to refute the notion that men’s national team members are paid more than th...

Steve Ballmer Wasn't Too Fazed About Jeanie Buss Secretly Calling Him "Ballz"
Clippers owner and shrieking enthusiast Steve Ballmer is riding high these days. His Clippers managed a respectable rebuild without ever going into the tank; Kawhi Leonard jumped ship from a championship squad to join his outfit, and brought Paul George along for the ride; and Thursday he shared wit...

The Night The Dodgers And Pirates Decided To Hold Their Brawl Off The Field
Sagging through the dog days, the Dodgers needed a jolt. Luckily, they had an ideal jolter in their clubhouse. Reggie Smith wasn’t the same player he’d been even recently, his damaged shoulder leaving him unable to throw and limiting him to pinch-hitting duty in every one of his 20 appearances throu...

Steve Ballmer Appears To Be In Heat While Introducing Kawhi Leonard And Paul George
The Los Angeles Clippers held an introductory press conference today for new players Paul George and Kawhi Leonard. Also on stage was team owner Steve Ballmer, known for being shiny, red, and het up while courtside at his team’s games. In a sense, this is charming: Ballmer’s one of the team owners w...

Mike Trout Throw Hard; Mike Trout Hit Hard
At basically any point during any baseball season from the last eight years, it’s been possible to glance at Mike Trout’s numbers and wonder if you are looking at the work of the greatest player in baseball history. The numbers, as a whole or segmented into whatever sample size you can imagine, alwa...

Report: Magic's Skeleton Reached Out Of The Grave, Grabbed A Microphone, And Screwed The Lakers
At this point, I’m ready to believe anything about Magic Johnson’s ability to screw over the Los Angeles Lakers, which according to a new report from The Athletic, was not lost with his departure from the team’s front office....

Phillies' Hector Neris Screams "Fuck You" At Dodgers Dugout After Save
Hector Neris got pretty fucking amped when Bryce Harper tracked down Justin Turner’s flyball into right centerfield on Thursday, which ended the game and gave the Phillies a 7-6 win over the Dodgers. It was an emotional level that certainly caught the attention of the Los Angeles dugout, with every ...
![Zlatan Ibrahimović Ethers Carlos Vela, Explains Why MLS Sucks [Updated]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/m9nx6czccec3vczcdlwy.jpg)
Zlatan Ibrahimović Ethers Carlos Vela, Explains Why MLS Sucks [Updated]
LAFC forward Carlos Vela has dominated MLS this year. Many believe this makes him the best player in the league. Zlatan Ibrahimović disagrees. After all, Vela might be the Messi of MLS, but as Zlatan astutely pointed out in an interview on ESPN in which he coolly savaged Vela’s career and the league...

Justin Upton Makes A Spectacular Leaping Attempt Really Nowhere Near The Ball
Justin Upton leads all active MLB outfielders with 82 career errors. The galaxy-brained solution to avoid adding to that tally? Misplay a ball so badly he ends up nowhere near it, giving the official scorer no choice but to rule it a hit....