m Page 6019 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Malcolm Gladwell Demands Bill Simmons Be An NBA GM
Bill Simmons' new doorstop of a book arrives in stores tomorrow. In a canny move, he had Malcolm Gladwell pen the foreword. And what does Fry Guy do in that foreword?...
Brad Childress Is The Ugliest Dame You’ll Ever See
Fucking Brad Childress. Only this prick would decline an offsides penalty on first down to take a seven-yard gain. Or dress like a woman on the flight to Pittsburgh to motivate his team. Wait, what?...
Breaking: Rick Reilly® Makes Another Dental Joke
Reilly®, doing the dumb "Nick Swisher loosens up the Yankees" story that everyone got out of his system in April, notes, "Swisher is a guy who won't stop laughing even when he brushes his teeth." Chew on that. [ESPN]...
Brooke Hundley Gets The Lewinsky Treatment
"The biggest reason this is in the news," CBSSports.com's Gregg Doyel said on CNN yesterday, apropos the Steve Phillips saga, "is because she's not real good looking." She isn't? I hadn't heard. People are usually so delicate about such things....
George Bodenheimer Requests That ESPN Employees Stop Telling The Media Who's Boinking Whom
Last week, prompted by the stories coming out about his company, ESPN President George Bodenheimer posted a memo to the in-house intranet outlining — and strongly reiterating — the rules about talking to the media....
Larry Johnson Meltdown Arrives Later Than Expected This Season (Update)
The Kansas City Chiefs are a disaster, obviously, but look on the bright side—it took permanently disgruntled RB Larry Johnson seven whole games to launch an embarrassing tirade against his head coach. I think that's improvement!...
The Mark McGwire Rehabilitation Project Begins Now
Mark McGwire wants to be loved again. Unfortunately, everyone hates him. So how to remedy that? Simple. Hitch your wagon to Tony La Russa's star. Everyone loves that dude!...
Cedric Benson Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cedric Benson, who won the weekend by making the Chicago Bears look foolish. Granted, he's not the first....
Sam Bradford Reminds You To Not Stay In School, Kids
Cautionary tale Sam Bradford will end his college career with season-ending shoulder surgery and a ticket to the NFL combine. That's the last time he takes career advice from Billy Sims. [NYTimes/MorningNews]...
Like A Kid Out There
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Steve Phillips Fired By ESPN (Updated)
Just days after being outed for having an affair with a younger co-worker, Baseball Tonight analyst and former-Met GM Steve Phillips has been fired by ESPN....
Do You Believe In Omens?
If you do, I hope you're not a Yankee fan like me. Because the cracks are starting to show....
Canada Blaming Canada For Shaming Canada
Our usually easygoing neighbors to the north are up in arms about Canada's junior hockey team suiting up in green jerseys. I'd make a joke about this move being made for the green, if Canada didn't use crazy monopoly money....
Bulls' Horseshoe Game Bull***t
USF student wins $10k halftime horseshoe toss (video here at 1:35 mark) until minor rules violations sets off major controversy, and he gets his novelty oversized (and misspelled) check back. [St. Pete Times]...
New Country, Same Garbage Football
The Patriots are good and the Bucs are terrible, in any language. Wait, they speak American over there?...
Your Late Games Open Thread
Citing a rise in player/referee collisions, the NFL plans to address the issue next season, including the possibility of officials wearing helmets. Now put on your padded commenter helmet and make fun of the late games. [ESPN]...
Peja Stojakovic Has Some 'Splainin To Do
The Hornets star was in Los Angeles on Friday. I know this not from looking at the schedule, but from the Tweets - and video - of a porn star who claimed she met him. Intimately....
Shaq's Brain Having Some Growing Pains
With, oh, two days before the season starts, O'Neal is still having a little trouble memorizing the playbook. Seen on Mike Brown's flash cards: "Stand in the paint. Draw two defenders. Stay out of LeBron's way." [Plain Dealer]...
Coach Tries Knife Threats To Get Through To Players
Revolutionary motivational techniques from a prep school football assistant coach: practice harder or I'll cut you....
Ball State Coach Nets First Win Since 1986
Here's a great read on Stan Parrish's first head coaching victory in 23 years. To put that in perspective, my wait is only 25 years, and I haven't devoted my life to coaching. [FanHouse]...