mad Page 33 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Barcelona Beat Real Madrid At Their Own Game
Over the past handful of years, Real Madrid have demonstrated what can only be described as a superpower for winning ugly. Specifically in knockout competitions, and specifically in the Champions League, time after time Madrid have labored for the greater part of 90 minutes against an opponent playi...

Barcelona Beat Real Madrid At Their Own Game
Over the past handful of years, Real Madrid have demonstrated what can only be described as a superpower for winning ugly. Specifically in knockout competitions, and specifically in the Champions League, time after time Madrid have labored for the greater part of 90 minutes against an opponent playi...

Real Madrid And Gareth Bale Can't Stand Each Other, But Can Still Find A Happy Ending<em></em><em></em><em></em>
That Gareth Bale scored the decisive goal in Real Madrid’s 2-1 victory over Levante Sunday mattered less than the fact that the perpetually gimpy and presently out-of-favor Welsh star played at all, and it’s less important even than his reaction to his match-winning penalty. Bale scored, as he often...

Diego Simeone Explains Ball-Grabbing Celebration: "It Means We Have Balls, A Lot Of Balls"
Atletico Madrid put together an impressive 2-0 victory over Juventus in the Champions League yesterday, and manager Diego Simeone was caught, uh, expressing himself after José María Giménez put his team up 1-0 in the 78th minute. As you can see in the GIF above, Simeone appeared to turn towards the ...

Who The Hell Is Going To Win The Champions League?
Barcelona. Real Madrid. Liverpool. Juventus. Manchester City. These are all European soccer teams, and more specifically the teams in the Champions League round of 16 that seemed most likely teams to take home the double-eared trophy on June 1. Barcelona and Real Madrid have won the last five Champi...

Sergio Ramos Became The Most Sent-Off Player In La Liga History After (Almost) Kicking A Guy In The Face
Sergio Ramos might have earned himself a week off with his latest act of shithousery. In the final minutes of Real Madrid’s match against Girona, Ramos and Girona’s Pedro Alcalá both went for a ball in the air that Casemiro headed into the middle of the penalty box. Alcalá tried to use his head to m...

Mamadou Sakho Is Crystal Palace's Dap Master
This video, in which Crystal Palace defender Mamadou Sakho walks around the team cafeteria casually rattling off a series of intricate and unique handshakes with eight different teammates, could only be improved if at the end manager Roy Hodgson walked up and the two pulled off the most complex one ...

Players Like Sergio Ramos Are Why You Can Never Count Out Real Madrid
Real Madrid were always going to struggle to cope with losing Cristiano Ronaldo last summer, and during the first half of a miserable season with only one notable bright spot, that challenge proved even tougher than most would’ve imagined. However, Real Madrid are still Real Madrid, winners of four ...

Sergio Ramos May Have Earned Himself A Suspension With His Big, Dumb Mouth
When you’re part of a top European soccer club, it’s probably easy to forget that the rules, at least in theory, apply to you as well. Whether that’s Manchester City wiping their collective asses with the Financial Fair Play regulations, or Barcelona players gleefully indulging in tapping up (the eq...

At Least Real Madrid's Lost Season Has Given Us The Rise Of Vinícius
At just 18 years old, in his first season in Europe, Brazilian forward Vinícius Júnior has already carved out a significant role for himself in Real Madrid’s squad. His emergence as a valuable and now arguably a critical component of one of the best teams in the world happened way faster than anyone...

<i>Madden</i> Is As Full Of Anonymous Players As The NFL Itself
It’s hardly a selling point, but this year’s edition of Madden has the real Kyle Lauletta. The game’s rendering of the Giants’ rookie quarterback—who stepped into a blowout win against Washington in Week 13 to throw five incompletions and a pick and then meekly returned to clipboard and donut-gofer ...

Torrey Smith Shows No Mercy On His Son In <i>Madden</i>
Panthers receiver Torrey Smith has been recognized here in the past for his outstanding sports baby—he and his wife Chanel now have three outstanding sports babies—but this was not one of T.J.’s finer moments. The tyke hopped on the sticks with his dad and got his ass whooped in Madden....

Real Madrid Is In A Pit of Sadness Right Now
When the ghost of Santi Cazorla is out here scoring braces on you for a team in the relegation zone, maybe your season’s not going so hot. And so, while the rest of the soccer world was watching the Manchester City-Liverpool banger, Real Madrid were busy writing the newest chapter of their disappoin...

Guy At Knicks Game Unwisely Tries To Get Team Staffer To Sit Down By Tugging On His Coat
Sure, it’s frustrating to have your view obstructed while trying to watch the scintillating matchup that is Nets-Knicks, but if it’s a staffer on one of the teams, don’t grab the person! Don’t grab anyone, for that matter....

Cristiano Ronaldo Is Glad He No Longer Plays With Selfish Assholes Like Cristiano Ronaldo
Cristiano Ronaldo obviously loves himself some Cristiano Ronaldo. But you know who Cristiano Ronaldo doesn’t love? Teammates who act like Cristiano Ronaldo....

Ousmane Dembélé Has The Sickest Pump-Fake In The World
For Ousmane Dembélé, Barcelona’s match against Atlético Madrid this weekend had to feel familiar. He started the game on the bench for the fourth La Liga match running, a reflection of the French wunderkind’s continued struggles to ingratiate himself with his teammates and manager thanks his now wel...

Report: Not Even FIFA Wants To Back This Stupid European Super League
Arguably the most corrupt sporting body in the world announced on Wednesday that it would actively work against the potential creation of a breakaway European Super League. The announcement was in response to a report from Der Spiegel that showed clubs like Bayern Munich and Real Madrid were alleged...

Julen Lopetegui Shit-Canned From The Job Of His Dreams Four Months After Being Shit-Canned From The Job Of His Dreams<em></em>
Pour one out for Julen Lopetegui, who has had just about the worst possible year a soccer manager can have. Real Madrid fired Lopetegui this afternoon, one day after an embarrassing 5-1 ass-kicking by Messi-less Barcelona, thus ending a nightmare of a year....

Barcelona Crushed Real Madrid And The Endless Cycle Of Death And Rebirth Begins Anew
Sunday’s edition of El Clásico between Barcelona and Real Madrid might have lacked the star-power and extraterrestrial individual greatness that Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo—both absent from the match for the first time in 11 years—always brought to the affair, but that doesn’t mean this world...

This Weekend Is The First <i>Clásico</i> Of The Rest Of Our Lives
The defining feature of the past decade of international soccer has been the enduring struggle of two opposing forces: Lionel Messi vs. Cristiano Ronaldo, Barcelona vs. Real Madrid. Two of the very best soccer players to ever live, their abilities maximized to the fullest extent possible thanks to m...