mad Page 94 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Please Don't Step On The Enormous Logo In The Rangers' Locker Room, Unless They Throw A Rug On Top
Madison Square Garden is the oldest arena in the NHL, and was best described as a serviceable dump. The kind of place that trafficked more in history than inherent charm. But that was before the beginning of a three-year renovation that will add the kinds of modern amenities that nobody was clamorin...
Watch Cristiano Ronaldo Get A First-Half Hat Trick, Cop A Cheap Feel Of Air
Start this one at the 0:23 mark. You'll see the cheeky celebration, then the goal. Actually, it's a filthy good goal, too. Here's the first part of the hat trick, and here's the second....
This Week In Frozen Armadillo Attack News
"According to investigators, the altercation occurred when the suspect was selling the carcass to the victim, who planned to eat the animal. The pair apparently began arguing over the price of the item when the man twice threw the armadillo at the woman. The animal first struck the woman in the leg...
Homemade Infographic: Is The World Series Famous Enough For Dirk Nowitzki?
Maybe Major League Baseball is preventing Dirk Nozitzki from throwing out the first pitch for the Texas Rangers for some reason other than as a courtesy to NBA owners, an intersport extension of the basketball lockout. Maybe it really is that as they weighed "what makes sense for the team and a good...
Duke Basketball Made More Insufferable With Auto-Tuned "Duke Worldwide" Music Video
Midnight Madness took place last weekend. Lots of people do insufferable things during Midnight Madness, and increasingly, they do those insufferable things on camera. This is no longer limited to a drunk sorority girl's iPhone filming from the upper deck, muffled by screams and excited shaking ha...
Dick Vitale Heralds The Start Of The College Basketball Season By Yelling At You For A While
Midnight Madness—the annual tradition in which college students get drunk and riled up to go watch their basketball teams perform skits and windmill dunks in anticipation of getting drunk and riled up to go watch their basketball teams play basketball—is tonight!...
This Evening: Logan Morrison, Intentional Dong
Your p.m. roundup for Oct. 14, the day the hipster cop came to save the day. Photo via Twitter. And yes, he knew we would post this. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Grading NBA Players On Their "LET US PLAY" Twitter Pleas
Today is last day the NBA lockout can end without missing games. Too bad. The lockout isn't ending, despite the social media screeching of various union members. The NBPA thankfully has retweeted much of that screeching solidarity. Here's how we classify it....
Homemade Infographic: Where Are ESPN's Naked Jocks Hiding And Tucking Their Bits?
The conceptual problem with ESPN The Magazine's Body Issue leads directly into the practical problem with it. Conceptually, as soon as you strip off the athletes' clothing to call more attention to their forms, you diminish the function that's supposed be integral to those forms, and you call attent...
A Homemade Infographic To Help Explain Who Is Still Chasing The Pennant And Who Is Not
Adrian Beltre, who the Boston Red Sox decided not to keep around this year, hit three home runs this afternoon, carrying the Texas Rangers into the American League Championship Series. That's two more homers than any Red Sox third baseman hit in any game this year. Just one of those subtle statistic...
A Homemade Infographic Explaining How Badly Mark Sanchez Played Last Night
Here's a breakdown of the 235 yards Mark Sanchez produced in Baltimore, as he powered the Ravens past his own New York Jets....
Former UConn Star Tate George Charged In $2 Million Ponzi Scheme
Tate George is best known for the play you see above, a turnaround buzzer-beater off a length-of-the-court pass from Scott Burrell that beat Clemson in the Sweet 16 of the 1990 NCAA tournament's East Regional. It happened two years before Christian Laettner's shot to beat Kentucky, and it's one of t...
Cristiano Ronaldo Gives Fans The Finger, Denies Giving Fans The Finger (Video)
The Real Madrid star at least was honest last week, when he expressed why he feels opposing fans heckle him, thus reinforcing those fans' notion of him as an arrogant prick. Here, he shows his appreciation for all the love, though he later was less than forthright by lamely trying to explain it aw...
The Rams Were A Real Pain In Ahmad Bradshaw's Nuts Last Night
Your morning roundup for Sept. 20, the day we learned that putting on a banana costume sometimes isn't worth it. Photo via tipster Ryan, who saw it on ESPN.com and wrote, "Thanks for the nut grab photo, ESPN." Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Levante 1, Real Madrid 0: How Did The Team That's "Ugly, Poor, And Bad At Football" Beat La Liga's Rich Pretty Boy?
A year ago, Levante earned a draw against Real Madrid, the best, wealthiest, handomest team in all of La Liga. It was a big moment for the Levante Granotes (that means frogs): Striker Rafa Jordá likened the 0-0 decision to "chewing the face off your girlfriend." (We'll blame shaky translation for th...
Cristiano Ronaldo Thinks He Knows Why You're Heckling Him, May Be Right
"I think that because I am rich, handsome and a great player people are envious of me. I don't have any other explanation." [Guardian]...
At Least Four Arizona State Fans Went To Last Night's Game In Blackface
Your morning roundup for Sept. 10, a day when it's apparently illegal for wannabe vampires to bite homeless men outside the neighborhood Hooters. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
"You Mad Bro" Sign Kicks Off High School Football Racism Controversy
Time once again to play Ohio or Florida! Time's up, it's Ohio....
Yes, Anderson Silva Is Being Likened To Muhammad Ali...
And Michael Jordan. And Wayne Gretzky. Okay, fine. Anderson Silva is a great athlete. He mauled Yushin Okami last weekend at UFC 134. But Ali, Jordan, and Gretzky rolled into one? Come now. Come. Let us not forget that a year ago, Silva was the one getting mauled for five rounds by Chael Sonnen unti...
NFL Suspends Terrelle Pryor For Breaking The NCAA's Rules
The NFL announced today it will essentially suspend Terrelle Pryor, a player who isn't in the NFL, for violating rules that aren't the NFL's. This is really incredible, and the most incredible part is that what should happen in a sane and just world—Pryor hires a very good attorney who buries the NF...