mb Page 394 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Yale's Football Coach, Like Vince Lombardi, May Have Padded His Academic Resume
Yale quarterback Patrick Witt's conflict with the Rhodes Scholarship organization this week has also drawn attention to the scholarly credentials of the school's football coach, Tom Williams. So far, the New York Times has devoted two stories—with two reporters working on each—to investigating wheth...

Never Badmouth Tom Brady During A Blowjob
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

That Mean Columbia Marching Band Has Been Un-Banned From Performing At The 0-9 Football Team's Last Game
You did it, Deadspin readers! Or at least our friends at the Columbia Spectator say you did it:...

Remember: This NFL Season Could Have Been David Sterned
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Buy Drew's new book, The Postmortal, through here. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Columbia Bans Marching Band From 0-9 Football Team's Finale Because The Band Made Fun Of The Team
Aw, horseshit. The Ivy League fun police have lost their damn minds. Columbia's banned its marching band from playing at the football team's final game this weekend, because, after the last game, the band made fun of the team with new lyrics to the school's fight song. Please....

Now It's Penn State Interim Coach Tom Bradley's Turn To Get Tossed Into The Meat Grinder
Tom Bradley's name is never mentioned in the 23-page Penn State grand jury summary. But that's undoubtedly true for a lot of witnesses whose appearance was not worth noting, since the summary is merely a report of the findings and the actual transcripts remain under seal. But the Patriot-News of Ha...

The MLS Goal Of The Year Is Incredible For Any League
Remember the name Darlington Nagbe: it's a wonderful name. But also because the Liberian-born, Ohio-raised midfielder was the second overall pick in this year's MLS draft, and scored his first career goal for Portland on this amazing juggle and volley in July. Today it was named the MLS Goal of th...

Karlos Dansby Is The Best Linebacker In The NFL, According To Karlos Dansby
Karlos Dansby had an interception, a couple of passes defended, a quarterback hurry, and 10 tackles in his 2-7 team's win over the 3-6 Washington Redskins on Sunday. And after a performance like that, Karlos Dansby is quite convinced that Karlos Dansby is the best linebacker in the NFL....

Don Johnson, The Champagne King And The Beast Of Blackjack, Has Once Again Punished An Atlantic City Casino
After a few months of suspiciously restrained behavior, blackjack savant Don Johnson has returned. He was spotted in October in Atlantic City stuffing fistfuls of casino chips into his gullet. Just grinding them up between his world-class molars. No, I made that up. He was actually cashing in fistfu...

Are All Fake Field Goals And Fake Punts Useless?
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Buy Drew's new book, The Postmortal, through here. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

ShortCenter: ESPN Breaks Out The Sad Guitar For Joe Paterno
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Is It Time To Lose Faith In The New England Patriots?
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Gamblers Beat Delaware With Math
Why you gots to pick on Delaware, bettors? Delaware never hurt no one. They were the first state. They don't charge income sales tax. It only takes like 20 minutes to drive through on your way to more important places. And now you're all gaming the system to bet NFL games, even though you're not tec...

Eli Manning Beats Tom Brady, Will Still Not Be Considered Elite: Your Sunday NFL Roundup
For whatever reason, Eli will always be considered just an "OK" quarterback. Maybe it's because he is a contemporary of some very, very good quarterbacks—one of whom is his big brother—or maybe it's because he is kind of a doofus. Either way, here's your Sunday roundup. Enjoy....

Brady-Manning Redux, No, The Other Manning: Your NFL Late Games Open Thread
Tom Brady > Eli Manning. Just look at their shirts. Come on, let's talk football down in the comments....

Aussie With World's Largest Collection Of Antoine Walker Memorabilia May Also Have World's Only Collection Of Antoine Walker Memorabilia
Matt Clarke from Australia calls himself the "biggest Walker fan in the world." (He's referring to former NBA/current Idaho Stampede player Antoine Walker, in case you don't share his passion.) We will not attempt to disprove that claim. If anyone else on this galaxy happens to own Walker's Timberwo...

America Likes LSU Tomorrow; Vegas Doesn't
Alabama is at -4.5 offshore and in most of Vegas, and that hasn't come down much despite the vast majority of bettors backing LSU—75 percent by one estimate. But it's all "$20 and $50 bets." The big money has withheld judgment so far....

Dear Bill Simmons, The Helmet Catch Was Not Luck
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Buy Drew's new book, The Postmortal, through here. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Appeals Court Finally Tosses Fine Against CBS For Janet Jackson's 2004 Wardrobe Malfunction
Writes the New York Times: "A federal appeals court on Wednesday again threw out a $550,000 fine against CBS by the Federal Communications Commission for Janet Jackson's famed "wardrobe malfunction" during the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show."...