milwaukee Page 35 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Children's Treasury Of Mascots Eating People
Mascots are running wild at our sporting events, both home and abroad. Who will put a stop to the madness? And why won't the music coordinators at these arenas use Temple of the Dog in place of Weird Al?...
Beer Is The Official Lifegiving Liquid Of Cleveland, And More Stories You Weren't Supposed To See
The Super Bowl is a black hole of news; anything non-football is quickly sucked in, never to escape into the public consciousness. Sometimes that's no accident. Here are three stories that were designed to fly under the radar....
How To Insure You're Alone Next Valentine's Day
The high bid is only $300 (with an estimated value of $850!) with two days remaining, but let's be honest. Anyone who would bid on the "Sausages Serenade Your Sweetheart" package probably doesn't have a sweetheart to serenade. [MLB.com Auctions]...
Fascists Sponsoring Marathons Now, Apparently
By the time you wake up tomorrow, you might be the winner of Milwaukee's Lakefront Marathon. Because every time they declare a victor, they turn around and get disqualified....
Baseball Pretends To Be Appalled By Prince Fielder's Home Run Celebration
Prince Fielder and his Brewers teammates, who celebrated Sunday's walk-off victory over the Giants with a little Jerome Robbins number, now stand accused of excessive immodesty by the Holy Church of Baseball People Who Need To Lighten The Hell Up....
Prince Fielder's March Of Vengeance
Nine innings were not enough for the Brewers and Dodgers to settle their differences—even if the 13-run differential says otherwise—so Prince Fielder led his Crew through the bowels of Dodger Stadium on a hunt for Guillermo Mota's head....
Why Your Stadium Sucks: Miller Park
This is a weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: The Milwaukee Brewers' Miller Park....
Don't Like Your Starting Pitcher? Sell Him On eBay
His value is estimated at $100,000, so for $.01 on a joke eBay auction, Suppan is a steal. Disclaimer: "No Harms was made to Brewers, Fans, Suppan, Hall and any other animal while making and publishing this add." [HRDerby]...
Brandon Jennings Continues To Offend, Well, Everyone
Any day now, the NBA will teach Brandon Jennings to be studiedly bland and tactful. Until then, let's enjoy the glorious insolence of a 19-year-old rookie who says what we've all thought at one time or another: "Fuck the Knicks."...
Young Money Is A Buck
10. Brandon Jennings, Compton via Italy. Forget all the hating, Jennings can play. The Bucks get him at a great spot, although they don't have a whole lot of talent surrounding him....
REMETEE Owner Passes Up Opportunity To Humiliate Desperate Women On National Television
Fact: Ryan Braun was asked to be on "The Bachelor." Fact: He said 'no thanks.' [Wisn.com]...
"No Sign Of Any Spirits" In This Milwaukee Hotel
"A player for the Dodgers has been known to sleep with a baseball bat for protection after hearing odd noises. And two pairs of Florida Marlins players reportedly demand to share a room... because they're afraid of ghosts." Sure, blame your losses to the Brewers on a haunted hotel. [WISN]...
A Match Made In Barley And Hops
"Hi fellow brewer fans, I am getting married in August and since both of us are diehard crew fans, we are having a brewers themed wedding." Stop right there. Where are you registered and should I bring bottles or cans? [Wrigleyville23]...
Trevor Hoffman's Music Scares The Crap Out Of Ken Macha
The Brewers manager says he hides in the bathroom when his closer enters the game, because Hoffman's entrance music is just too darn loud. Or maybe it's the new Japanese seat warmers? [ESPN; game notes]...
Brewers Fan Saves Bikini Girl From Rogue Home Run Ball
Imagine a young woman innocently sunbathing at a baseball game, when a vicious home run ball comes rocketing toward her unsuspecting frame, with nothing but a bikini top to defend herself? What do you do?!...
Charlie Villanueva Will Tweet From The Darndest Places
Bucks' officials are confirming that Charlie Villanueva sent out a Twitter message during halftime of their game with the Celtics on Sunday. It's a Twitter war folks, and we are on the front lines....
About Last Night
What you missed while taking your best gal out for a night on the town......
Bango Goes Down!
Earlier we showed you the incredible true story of a basketball shot banked in off the crotch of Bango, the Milwaukee Buck. What you didn't see was the tragic aftermath of that horrible day....
Milwaukee Admirals To Host 'Don't Be Like Mike Night'
"Anyone named Michael, Phelps, Mary Jane, Cheech, Chong, Weed (Wied) or anyone who has won an Olympic Gold Medal can get their ticket for only $2." [Milwaukee Admirals]...