mlb Page 535 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Look Who's Here, Everyone. It's Barry Bonds!
In today's episode of "Everybody Loves Barry," the semi-retired slugger pays a visit to his old home, gets a standing ovation, and explains that evil jerk side of his brain—that's just a character he plays!...

Cardinals Fans Unable To Head For The Mountains
Busch Beer is apparently very hard to come by at Busch Stadium this season. And this is a problem somehow? [Riverfront Times]...

Barry Zito's Obscene Gingerbread Twitter Photos Are Somewhat Disturbing
Ladies and gentlemen, the handiwork of tonight's Giants starting pitcher against the Dodgers. PETA would like to get involved, but their jurisdiction doesn't include desserts. [Twitter]...

David Eckstein Is Married To A Jedi
Ashley Eckstein—wife of San Diego grit machine David—provides the voice for Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker's Padawan apprentice in the "Clone Wars" animated series. That explains so much. [LA Times]...

Milton Bradley: 'I Never Had A Problem In My Life Until I Started Playing Baseball'
Milton Bradley's latest media boycott lasted about as long as Kramer's vow of silence on that episode of Senifeld. For someone who's not talking, there sure was a horn 'o plenty of quotes on Thursday....

New Mouth Guard Is Effective, And Most Importantly, Stylish
Look closely the next time Eric Byrnes steps in the batter's box. Focus in on his face, examine his mouth. Do you see it? Um no, I refuse to do this. Next question?...

Big Papi Fires Warning Shot Over Joba's Bow
Their series doesn't begin until tomorrow, but David Ortiz thought he'd get in a preemptive strike today against Joba Chamberlain and the Yankees. Hey Joba, please don't throw at our noggins....

Money For Nothing And Your Outfielders For Free
Outfielder Jason Tyner was assigned to Class AAA by the Tigers, who acquired him today from the Brewers for, apparently, nothing. [NBCSports]...

Freddie Sez Has About Had It With High Ticket Prices
So yeah, there are plenty of those high-priced corporate seats that are empty at Yankee Stadium this season. But here's the real tragedy: Freddie Sez can't get in!...

100-Year-Old Red Sox Bat Boy Says It's Go Time
Having learned from the Cubs that to reject a centenarian fan means certain doom, the Boston Red Sox are employing the spry Arthur Giddon as a bat boy for one batter on Saturday....

Umpire Kerwin Danley May Need Stronger Head Gear
Kerwin Danley was carted off the field last night after getting hit in the head with a broken bat—almost a year to the day since he was plunked in face by a Brad Penny fastball....

Cubs Fans Will Never Escape Their Terrible Destiny
A rogue cat invaded Wrigley Field yesterday, reminding Cubbie fans everywhere that the ceaseless torment of loving sport's most accursed franchise will follow them to their eternal damnation beyond the grave....

How Clemens' Retirement May Have Single-Handedly Sunk The Housing Market
At this rate there are going to be more books on Roger Clemens than on Abraham Lincoln ... and why not? Lincoln never kept apartments in 12 different cities for all of his women....

Mets Fans Give Thanks For One More Thing To Complain About
The Great Doc Gooden Autograph Controversy is mercifully at an end, the Mets having reversed field on the issue after getting an earful in a glorious media/fan backlash....

Doc Gooden: Wanton CitiField Graffiti Outlaw
Apparently Felix Unger is now in charge of stadium operations at CitiField. Hey, it's a brand new stadium! Don't write on the walls! Even if you've won a Cy Young Award and your name is Doc Gooden....

Elijah Dukes Uses His Powers For Good, Still Gets Into Trouble
Elijah Dukes spent Saturday afternoon signing autographs for Little Leaguers. Naturally, that led to him being benched, a crushing defeat for the Nationals, and a teammate with a broken ankle....

Rod Blagojevich Will Tweak Your Lineup
Did former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich really once give Lou Piniella lineup advice? And more importantly, why didn't Piniella take it?...

Nick Adenhart Jerseys Deemed "Inappropriate" By MLB.com
One frustrated emailer wrote in that when he attempted to purchase a customized Nick Adenhart T-shirt from MLB.com's online store, he was quickly denied....

Well That Didn't Take Long
A tipster writes: "I'm following the Cubs/Cards game on ESPN and the play ticker said that Milton Bradley just got ejected. Haha. I have no idea what happened but I hope it's hilarious."...

'God Bless America' Guy Decides To Sue Yankees
Patriotism taken to horrifying extremes, or a rogue fan intent on mocking decent society? Yankees fan Bradford Campeau-Laurion has his side of the story, the cops have theirs. Now, a court will decide....