mo Page 563 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Marlins Ate $8 Million Worth Of Salary To Get Rid Of "Bitter Pariah" Heath Bell
The Miami Marlins traded Heath Bell away to the Arizona Diamondbacks—well, gave him away and promised to pay part of his salary, more than traded—and the Miami Herald dispatch announcing his departure made sure to give him a good kneecapping on the way out....
Boxers Are Allowed To Choose Whether To Fight Opponents Who Have Failed Multiple Drug Tests, And One Chose Correctly Last Night
During the run-up to his fight against Danny Garcia at the Barclays Center Saturday night, Erik Morales failed two consecutive drug tests, testing positive for clenbuterol, the PED that got Alberto Contador stripped of the 2010 Tour de France title. He then passed a drug test on Friday night, meanin...
Beer Of The Week: Australia's Coopers Brewery Sparkling Ale
When I dropped the six-pack of Coopers Brewery Sparkling Ale on the counter at the liquor store, the clerk immediately began singing its praises, in what sounded like an Australian accent. This was pure happy coincidence, best I could tell....
This Week's Signs Of The Apocalypse
For nearly two decades, Sports Illustrated has stirred the tea leaves to discern a weekly Sign of the Apocalypse. Deadspin salutes the magazine's ongoing effort to cover the end of times but declines to cede the scoop on the biggest event in world history....
The Monster Wore A Tank Top. <em>Paranormal Activity 4,</em> Reviewed.
1. Like Grierson, I'm a sucker for the Paranormal Activity films. I don't care that their stories don't make sense, that apparently there's some sort of mythology tying everything together behind them, that no one ever, ever turns that goddamned camera off. These movies work not as movies—they're ba...
Another Horrible Way Friends Cockblock One Another
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
<em>The B.S. Report</em> Report: This Is Positive Bullshit!
Julia Alvidrez, Gawker Media's operations manager, is an unabashed fan of Bill Simmons and everything Grantland. She is also an occasional reader of Deadspin. Every week, she will recap Simmons's podcast, The B.S. Report, for us....
Delmon Young Is By Far The Worst Player To Ever Win The ALCS MVP
After his team completed their sweep of the New York Yankees last night, Delmon Young was awarded the ALCS MVP. Normally, this award isn't that big of a deal. It's a footnote that gets tacked on to the narrative of the series, and everyone forgets who won it a few days later. Young's award stands o...
Will Terrell Suggs Save The Struggling Ravens' Defense, Or Will He Doom It?
The Ravens are known for their defense. In most every game Baltimore plays—and this goes double when they play the Steelers—color commentators wax about "hard-nosed football" and "defensive mentality" and "slobber-knockers."...
A Semi-Comprehensive List Of Everything Tyler Perry Pretends To Do In <em>Alex Cross</em>
Tyler Perry, tired (temporarily) of wearing dresses in his own movies, stars tomorrow in Alex Cross, playing the titular character of James Patterson's series of novels. Here is a semi-comprehensive list of everything Tyler Perry pretends to do in Alex Cross, in order. Spoilers abound....
Everything You'd Ever Want To Know About Kyna Treacy, The Girl In The Stands A-Rod Was Macking On
Last Saturday, Alex Rodriguez allegedly attempted to woo a pretty lady in the stands during his team's Game 1 loss to the Detroit Tigers. Now, the object of A-Rod's affection has been identified as Kyna Treacy, Australian model and owner of her own swimwear line. If Australian tabloids are to be bel...
Former Football Player Gets Speeding Ticket
Actually, Plaxico Burress got his speeding ticket back in early September, but it's easier to keep these things quiet when you're not actually an NFL player. Burress has a November court date for his ticket, which he garnered in Broward County, Fla. (He owns a home in Lighthouse Point.) According to...
Bill Simmons And Jalen Rose Are Heading To ESPN's <em>NBA Countdown<em></em></em>
This news broke a few days ago, and ESPN confirmed it today: Bill Simmons and Jalen Rose are joining Magic Johnson and Michael Wilbon on ESPN's NBA Countdown. Getting the boot? Jon Barry and Chris Broussard. The press release: Barry "will transition to game analysis," and Broussard will remain an "N...
The Nationals And Orioles Are Not Refunding The "Service Charge" On Playoff Tickets For Games That Don't Exist
There is some cognitive dissonance in purchasing tickets for a round of the playoffs that your team has no guarantees of even advancing to. The presale is a must, of course—the teams need time to sell out, and ticketholders would probably like to know more than a day or two in advance if they're goi...
<em>The Sessions</em> And The Trap Of The Disease-Of-The-Week Movie
All genres have their trademarks. In romantic comedies, the two meet, fall in love, break up, and then wind up together. In action movies, a lot of ass is kicked, then more ass is kicked, and then at the end, a hell of a lot of ass is kicked. That predictability isn't always a bad thing—after all, w...
Tuesday Night Fights: Rodney Anonymous Reflects On "Ten Minutes Of Pure Crazy"
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs "Philly Fight! 2012 Crackheads Going N Downtown Philly!" Tonight's commentator: occasional Deadspin contributor Rodney Anonymous of The Dead Milkmen....
This Isn't Your Life: On the Brilliant, Trippy <em>Holy Motors</em>
We like to believe that we're the masters of our own destinies, that our lives are ours to do with as we wish. But in reality, that's not true. We behave differently around our bosses than we do around our friends. Even as grown-ups, we still revert to childish tendencies when we're around our paren...
The Many, Many Tweets Referring To Alex Rodriguez As "Fag," "Pussy," And "Gay-Rod"
Alex Rodriguez is both straight and male, but you wouldn't know it from the insults lobbed his way on Twitter over the past few days. Here are a few hundred examples....
South Carolina Fan Arrested For Mooning The Crowd At LSU Game
You do get the feeling that Saturday night's game would have been extra-frustrating for a Gamecocks fan who traveled all the way from South Carolina only to watch his No. 3 team get upset in Baton Rouge. So that explains, but does not excuse, the actions of Charles Hattaway, a 34-year-old from Charl...
Wes Welker Getting Phased Out Of His Shoes, The Chiefs And Bucs Combining For Something Like A Football Play, And More: Your Sunday NFL GIF Roundup
Here's where we're putting the GIFs of the week, from Wes Welker getting housed to Robert Griffin III looking super human. ...