mo Page 636 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chelsea Owner Roman Abramovich Relieved To Still Have The World's Biggest Symbolic Penis
Thought we couldn't put a sports spin on the recent revelation that Teodoro Nguema Obiang Mangue, the son of the dictator of Equatorial Guinea, had commissioned a yacht with a movie theater on board? Wrong....

Soccer Player Who Killed Fluffy, Defenseless Owl May Get Jail Time
Luis Moreno, the defender for Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A who kicked an opposing club's pet owl off the field on Sunday, could get up to three months of jail time for the incident. The owl was treated for traumatic stress at Zoosalud veterinary clinic in Barranquilla, Colombia, but die...

The First Look At The Mustachioed Mopper From Texas
Your morning roundup for March 1, the day Charlie Sheen rode a mercury surfboard on the media tsunami....

Here's A Soccer Player Kicking A Defenseless Fluffy Owl In The Face
This is a clip from a Sunday match between Junior Barranquilla and Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A. The owl, which is apparently Junior's club pet, made it on to the field in the middle of play and Pereira defender Luis Moreno swiftly booted it three meters off the field. Moreno hasn't b...

Drug Rumors Morph Arkansas QB Ryan Mallett Into The Next Ryan Leaf
At the Indianapolis scouting combines, the press asked NFL aspirant Ryan Mallett about the "heavy rumors of drug use and [if] possible addiction kept him from coming out for the 2010 draft." Those "heavy rumors" stem from an article by Tony Softli, a former NFL executive in Carolina and St. Louis, ...

Dave Duerson's Funeral Was Held In Chicago Today
Eight days after his teammate committed suicide, former Chicago Bear Richard Dent was among those who carried Dave Duerson's casket into a South Side Baptist church for a memorial service and funeral today. Hundreds of mourners attended. Duerson's youngest son Brock offered one of several eulogies....

The Detroit Pistons Went With A Malcontent-Free Six-Man Roster Last Night
Your morning roundup for Feb. 26, the day San Francisco starts looking for messages in the snow....

Enter Madness: Jimmer Fredette And Four More Will Play At San Diego State Tomorrow
The two greatest phenomena of this year's college basketball season, BYU folk hero Jimmer Fredette and 27-1 San Diego State University, will play tomorrow at 2 p.m. EST in San Diego's Viejas Arena. And not to cause one of those "ohmygodit'smaypril!" moments for you, but March begins on Tuesday, and...

The Smart Way To Expand The NFL Season: 18 Weeks, Not 18 Games
This is Regressing, a numbers-minded column by our clever friends at the Harvard Sports Analysis Collective. Today: Why a second bye week makes sense....

Cockblocked By Phish!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Major League Booger-Picking, Possible Booger-Eating In Montreal
Sorry chum, hate to call you out on this, but you've got seats behind the bench, and with our jealously comes the desire to make fun of you for going to town on (inter)national TV....

Libyan Protesters Repping Our Least Relevant College Teams
Why yes, that is a Montana Grizzlies sweatshirt among the angry masses in Benghazi. I hear Gaddafi's mercenaries have all been issued MSU Bobcat gear in return. [The Lowdown]...

Baron Davis Traded To Cleveland, Some 2,300 Miles Away From Donald Sterling's Taunts
Clippers guard Baron Davis, who has averaged 12.8 points and 7 assists this season — with some credit due to Blake Griffin's ability to finish close to the basket — is headed to Cleveland, along with a first-round draft pick. The Cavs are sending Mo Williams and Jamario Moon. Davis, who is nursing a...

Lenny Dykstra Vouches That Charlie Sheen Is A "Rock Star" And "F-ing Genius"
It was always supposed to come to this: Lenny Dykstra singing the "exclusive" praises of his pal Charlie Sheen to Radar Online. But Lenny being Lenny, there has to be an endgame, and that endgame could very well be squatter's rights on a spare room at Sheen's L.A. mansion, where he was hanging last...

Italian Fans Will Miss Gallinari, Russians счастливый To See Mozgov Go, According To Ethnic Sources
Today's Times offers a second-day story on the Melo trade. You will best appreciate the piece if you read it in silly accents and embrace two of the ethnic stereotypes not often associated with the NBA!...

Jason Kendall Blows Up At A Reporter, Is Kind Of An Asshole
Yesterday, Nick Wright of 610 AM was interviewing Royals prospect Mike Moustakas when he asked him a wholly innocuous question about possibly starting the season in AAA to delay his arbitration clock. That's when Jason Kendall, not even part of the conversation, jumped in....

Vanderbilt Mascot Punches Vanderbilt Fan, Bloodying His Nose
Vandy's mascot "Mr. C" went after one of his own fans before yesterday's loss to Tennessee. Local news tried to make the excuse that he was overzealous, or perhaps couldn't see out of the oversized foam head, but our tipster relays that the bloody student had grabbed Mr. C's junk during a crowd su...

Texas A&M Recruit Jordan Green Eschews Cars, Dunks Over Defenders
Jordan Green, out of Flower Mound High School in Texas, had a pretty epic dunk this weekend. So epic, in fact, that he knocked over a player on the opposing team. So while Blake Griffin was jumping over cars in the dunk contest this weekend, Jordan Green was jumping over people. The only way to up...

One Thing I Think I Think: Peter King Is The Latest In A Long Line Of Management Stooges
First there was that epic profile of Roger Goodell, which was 6,000 words of Peter King trying to stuff some brains and character into an empty suit. Then there was this item the other day. I know it's CBA season, and I can only imagine how difficult and disorienting it must be for football writers ...

QB Trick Shot Videos Are The New Hotness
This one comes from Monmouth College (Ill.) quarterback Alex Tanney. He's got some moves just as impressive as Johnny McEntee, but his reel doesn't have the same production values. Can substance overcome style?...