nan Page 120 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fernando Torres's Goal Drew Orgasmic Moaning From Gary Neville
It wasn't so much that £50m man Torres scored a goal — though, holy crap, Fernando Torres scored a goal! — as it was Chelsea completing a 10-man comeback and 45-minute stand against Barcelona in the Champions League semifinal. But Gary Neville, working the game for Sky Sports, was driven to what c...
Tony Parker's Crossover Of Ramon Sessions Is So Good, Sessions's Teammate Applauds
Parker goes from left to right so quickly, Sessions is left with an instant to wonder what happened before he makes a too-late attempt to recover. But what about Jordan Hill, in the headband on the Lakers' bench? Parker's move also seems to fake him into cheering for the wrong team....
Finance Guy Keeps Incredibly Detailed, Incredibly Creepy Spreadsheet Of His Match.com Prospects
Let's call this guy, oh, "Dave." Dave is a financial services employee in New York. Dave goes on Match.com, and meets women, and sometimes goes on dates with them. Then Dave goes home and enters all sorts of information into an Excel sheet, to keep track of everyone....
The Red Sox Game Ended With A Magical Elastic Strike Zone
With runners on first and second with two outs, and the Rays up one in today's Patriots' Day morning start at Fenway, it came down to Fernando Rodney and Cody Ross. Rodney threw five straight balls outside, except three of them weren't strictly balls, since home plate ump Larry Vanover called them s...
5 Important Contracts Set To Expire At ESPN (Or, Why Michelle Beadle Is Probably Done In Bristol)
On Tuesday, we told you that ESPN execs are ready to walk away from Rick Reilly's contract when it expires next year. But what about this year's expiring contracts? Whose time in Bristol might soon be over? We counted at least four ESPN talents—plus Colin Cowherd—whose deals are up this year. Here's...
The Restorative Power Of The Chick-Fil-A Banana Pudding Milkshake
I've had a bad week. Not just a normal bad week, where you stub your toe and your DVR forgets to record Best Sex Ever or something like that. I mean, a legitimate bad week, where your loved ones are hospitalized and you crash your car into an illegal immigrant while going TO the hospital to visit yo...
Ty Lawson's Crossover Dribble Literally Busted Ryan Anderson's Ankle
It's generally the go-to descriptor for an effective crossover dribble: "He broke the defender's ankles." Usually, this is a considerable exaggeration—but don't tell Magic forward Ryan Anderson that, because his ankle rolled over like a Suzuki Samurai while trying to guard Ty Lawson late in last ni...
Ryan Anderson's Miss At The Buzzer Was Worthy Of His Facepalm Reaction
Not to take anything away from Dirk Nowitzki's game-winning basket, but the 5.9 seconds remaining were enough for Orlando to get off not one but two final shots in an attempt to tie the 100-98 Mavericks lead. The second of these—an awkward scoop at the buzzer from under the rim—didn't fall for Ryan...
Joe Posnanski Is Leaving <em>Sports Illustrated</em> For Some Sort Of New <em>USA Today</em> Venture
Posnanski confirmed his departure after approximately three years at SI in a phone conversation with The Big Lead. He's joining some sort of joint venture between USA Today and MLB Advanced Media, which became a thing just last month....
Texas Death-Row Inmate Shouts "Go Cowboys!" During Execution
Jesse Joe Hernandez was convicted of beating a 10-month-old boy to death back in 2001. He also beat the boy's four-year-old sister, who managed to survive. Because the crimes happened in Dallas, which happens to be in Texas, which happens to be ranked No. 1 in the nation in the application of capit...
Remembering The Deal Of The Century: When Two Yankees Swapped Wives
Excerpted from Damn Yankees: Twenty-Four Major League Writers on the World's Most Loved (and Hated) Team, out on April 3....
The NBA.com Boxscore Has The Silliest (And Best) Explanation For Why Tim Duncan Didn't Play Tonight
Tim Duncan wasn't hurt tonight. He merely took a day off from the daunting post-lockout grind to rest his bones, and his Spurs beat the Sixers anyway, 93-76. The ESPN.com boxscore says "DNP-REST." The NBA's, pictured above, wasn't so politically correct. "DND-OLD." Poor, poor, old Tim Duncan. He tur...
The Spurs May Be Near The Top Of The NBA, But Their Tickets Are In The Cellar
Time for another look at the least-wanted NBA tickets of the past month. The list of teams on the discount leaderboard is mostly what you'd expect: the Nets, Kings, Jazz, and Hornets, all lottery teams if the season were to end today....
The End Of The World Will Be Announced By Pat Kiernan
About three minutes into 4:44 Last Day on Earth, an extremely indulgent and stupid movie that opens tomorrow and that you should absolutely not see, NY1 anchor Pat Kiernan stares into the camera and prepares us all to die. If the world is gonna end, if we're all gonna go out together, if that's how ...
Gregg Popovich Gets Belligerent When Talking About His Invisible Bowling Balls
The San Antonio Spurs brought a heavy dose of Thorazine to Linsanity last night, dealing the Knicks their sixth loss in the last nine games. Coach Gregg Popovich, though, didn't see the therapy regimen through to the end—he got tossed in the third quarter. Fortunately, he was able to squeeze in thi...
World's Biggest Cricket Benefactor Found Guilty Of $7 Billion Ponzi Scheme
Allen Stanford, the Texas "financier" who once lavished millions of dollars on cricketers around the world, was convicted today of allegedly swindling investors out of more than $7 billion:...
Football Recruit Schedules College Decision Announcement At Elementary School, Never Shows Up [UPDATE]
Five-star football recruit Davonte Neal let the excitement of National Signing Day pass him by, electing to make his decision today at an elementary school in his hometown of Scottsdale, Arizona. Recruiting pros said the decision would be between Arizona, Notre Dame, North Carolina, and Arkansas—w...
Nantz: Pebble Beach Is The World's Best Golf Course, So You Should Respect Bill Belichick For Playing It
Pebble Beach Golf Links (among the other courses associated with the Pebble Beach Pro-Am) is one of the most desired courses on Earth for hackers to play. Today's CBS broadcast of the event regularly referred to it as "The World's Best Golf Course." Yet for some competitors in the Pro-Am, CBS golf...
The Tongan Olympic Luger Who Turned Out To Be An Underwear Marketing Scam
Imagine if the events surrounding 1988 Jamaican bobsled team that inspired the film Cool Runnings happened today, in the age of the internet and 24-hour sports coverage. Now imagine one of those athletes, by pure chance, had been named Calvin Klein. And after his emergence on the international scene...
Dan Patrick On Aaron Hernandez: "Yet Another Talented Person Who Left Bristol, Connecticut"
(He's talking about his own acrimonious exit from ESPN.) [NBC]...