NBA Page 647 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Baby Is Not A Public Relations Stooge
Continuing in the grand tradition of cute tiny babies being terrified by professional athletes photos — a genre that hit its pinnacle with this legendary shot — we present this photo of Stephon Marbury, about to be backhanded by a child who doesn't want those cheap-ass ugly shoes....
That's All For The Leftover Bulls
Something struck us as awfully sad today when we learned that Toni Kukoc is retiring from the NBA. It always makes sports fans feel old when someone who they remember coming in as a rookie ends up retiring, but somehow Kukoc hanging them up felt different, probably because he was the last guy left...
Kareem Takes A Large Dump On Someone Else's Lawn
If you needed another reason that the late Wilt Chamberlain was countless times more interesting than all-time scoring champ Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, we bring you this gossip item from today's New York Daily News....
Mark Cuban Explains It All
Why can't the U.S. basketball team seem to win in international competition anymore? Leave it to Mark Cuban to unravel this mystery. It may shock you to learn that Cuban lays the blame directly on those damn pyramid-shaped lanes. Oh, and the international ball. And the way the referees are dressed. ...
Stephon Marbury Is Really Hungry For Some Reason
One of our favorite jokes on The Smoking Gun is the big list of backstage demands all the different rock stars have. There's something beautiful about learning that Kansas insists on being provided prune juice....
You Know This Took About Eight Days To Film, And He Kept Pinching PA's Asses
We'd like to thank The Basketball Jones for this arcane piece of beauty, featuring the Fresh Prince playing an imaginary game against a guy who just know he'll try to sign someday....
Throw It DOWN, Big Man!
So you know how Lakers forward Luke Walton was supposed to make a guest appearance on "The Young & The Restless" earlier this week? Wait: You didn't know that? What's wrong with you?...
Sprewell Is Apparently Obsessed With This Choking Thing
Despite his brief resurgence with the Knicks a few years ago, it's obvious that Latrell Sprewell was never quite the same after his famous choking incident with coach P.J. Carlesimo in 1997. Before that, Sprewell was a hot-headed slasher on a team nobody paid attention to. After that, he was Everyth...
Allen Iverson's Mom Set To Revolutionize The ABA
Ann Iverson, mother of NBA superstar Allen, has become the owner of an ABA franchise. Richmond will be the city, and there's not a nickname yet, though "Iversons" or "Answers" might be a good bet....
Rik Smits And His Tiny Bikes
We have had many thoughts about former Pacers center Rik Smits in our lives — Really. We have. — mostly involving his unique ability to look like the answer to the question: What would happen if aliens could grow mustaches?...
Baxter Receives Amazingly Quick Justice
You know, we are no experts in the ever-turning wheels of justice ... but man, this Lonny Baxter thing got settled fast, didn't it?...
A Warning To The Women Of San Antonio
This comes our way from Media Take Out, and there's probably no real reason to believe that it's true, but it's a hell of a story nonetheless. A woman claims that she met former New York Knick and current San Antonio Spur Jackie Butler at the 40/40 Club in New York a few months ago....
Ron Artest Talks With Kids: Can World Peace Be Far Behind?
From the looks of things, it's only a matter of time before Ron Artest is asked to appear on Sesame Street. We're a wee bit late on this, but fortunately TrueHoop was paying close attention to Artest's first day of mandatory community service yesterday, which was part of his punishment for the 2004 ...
One Must Be Careful Of Those Midnight "Inconvenient Truth" Screenings
You know, if you had told us an NBA player was going to take a couple shots at the White House, we would have thought it would have been Etan Thomas. (We kid Etan Thomas; his political beliefs are sincere, just like his poetry about Abe Pollin's prostate.)...
NBA Rookies, Striking A Pose
Over the weekend, the NBA had its Rookie Photo Shot, which features various NBA pups posing in various manly poses, except for JJ Redick, who of course looks like he's auditioning for the Rock Chalk Dance Team....
Eddie Johnson Reminds You That He Does Not Molest Children
It was really not the best of weeks for Phoenix Suns broadcaster (and former Illini) Eddie Johnson. As we mentioned, Johnson was consistently confused with fellow former NBA player Eddie Johnson, who was just arrested and charged with child molestation. Problem is, most people don't know that Eddie ...
No, No, Not THAT Eddie Johnson
Yeah, see, yesterday was just a terrible day to be a former basketball player named Eddie Johnson who happened to not be accused of child molestation....
Free Darko, Live On Scene, And Loving Jim Gray
Generally speaking, we think it's silly for online writers — who are the only ones free from the PR/press pass/everybody-play-nice circle jerk of commercialized athletics — to salivate over press passes as if they had, at last, been invited to the ball. But we will make an exception when the folks f...
Colonless Guy Scores 132 Points In Two Games
It's probably a little bit unfair to refer to DeJuan Wagner as an anonymous colonless guy, but he has been fairly anonymous over the past couple of years. He was once the next big thing, a scoring machine in high school, and the 6th-overall pick in the NBA draft. His game never translated that well ...
Making Tall Men Play Basketball, Poorly
And with this poorly scored video, we introduce you to the phenomenon known as Sun Ming-Ming, who is currently with the Dodge City Legend of the USBL. He is seven-foot-nine, which makes him the tallest man in professional basketball and the seventh tallest man in the world....