nba Page 708 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
C. Ronaldo’s Latest Attempt And 9 Great Football Adverts!
Listening to the various ad execs taking him through their latest idea must have caused something of a tightening in the Cristiano Ronaldo trousers....
Near-Death Experiences, Deodorant, And Eggert’s Shymen
Before we get down to business, I must note that the bottom of this post contains video of the money scene from "Blown Away," which is NSFW, but well worth you risking instant unemployment. Now, to your letters....
Snackbots, Astrobating, And Magic Condiment Fingers
I have a question for all the commenters out there: Would you star in a porn film if someone asked you? A real porn film that gets posted on the Internet and everywhere else. You get paid. Like say, two hundred bucks. And you get to have sex with a top tier porn star, like Lisa Ann or someone like t...
The Ron Artest Hair Odyssey Gets Cancelled
All that fuss over Artest's purple-and-gold, multilingual hairstyle? For naught. After letting Vince Carter go off for 25, Artest shaved the whole damn thing off. [Twitter]...
A Real, Honest-To-Goodness NBA Rivalry? Awesome.
Matt Barnes was in Kobe's face all game long (and occasionally, quite literally). Lamar Odom called Barnes "a monkey." It makes for a possible finals matchup not involving Kobe and LeBron that, dare I say it, would be anticipated....
Allen Iverson's Life Is Quickly Becoming A 12-Bar Blues
There's the divorce, and now, via a concerned Stephen A. Smith, comes word of Iverson's "well-known penchant for alcohol and his banishment from casinos in Detroit and Atlantic City." He's a hellhound shy of a Robert Johnson song now. [Inquirer]...
Newcastle Signs Peter Parker, Goblin Attacks Up 32%
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Ron Artest's Hair Odyssey
His rebounds and steals per game are down for the year. But Ron Artest still means defense! Or at least he's gotten it dyed in his newly-platinum hair, in three different languages. He thinks that's what it says, anyway....
It Was Quite A Night In Cleveland
It was a night of Snuggies, seizures and six (wins in a row for the Cavs) at the Quicken Loans Arena....
Brittney Griner Suspension Is Typical, But Not Enough
NCAA rules demand that a player who throws a punch in a game get an automatic one-game suspension. Brittney Griner's coach gave her one more to grow on but even if that's normal, it's not really what she deserves....
A Children's Treasury Of Mascots Eating People
Mascots are running wild at our sporting events, both home and abroad. Who will put a stop to the madness? And why won't the music coordinators at these arenas use Temple of the Dog in place of Weird Al?...
Wizards Tickets Less Valuable Than A Pot Of Coffee
The NBA has an exciting new promotion where fans can earn two free tickets to a Washington home game simply by drinking five cups of Dunkin Donuts coffee. Or save up for a sixth cup....and get another cup of coffee!...
Clippers Fandom Now An Exercise In Spiritual Enlightenment
"For me, being a Los Angeles Clippers fan for over twenty years has taught me firsthand about the spiritual dimensions of faith and suffering, and has helped me better understand my own Hindu tradition." [Huffington Post]...
This Explains A Little More About AI's Absence
Tawanna Iverson filed for divorce, after 8 1/2 years of marriage. Unemployed father, sick child, broken home; it's like the Iversons are a microcosm for every recession-hit Rust Belt family. Besides the millions of dollars. [Philly Daily News]...
Manwhores, Gays, And Pantomimed Couch Lifting
The Oscars are on Sunday, which means it's time for me to spend the week processing any number of scenarios in which I am involved in the ceremony. I watch the stupid Oscars every year, and they grow more insufferable on an annual basis. Yet that will never stop me from daydreaming of the day I get ...
Clippers Add To Their Distinguished Record Of Racial Sensitivity
I have no idea what's going on in this press release, except that the Steven Esparza in question is a media services assistant with the team, and that the Clippers are an abomination of a franchise. [NBA.com, via @HoopsHype]...
Grizzlies Fan Enters The Pantheon Of Painful Trampoline Dunk Failures (UPDATE)
Last night, one lucky Memphis fan got the chance to dunk off of a trampoline. He managed the dunk itself, but what followed was yet another reminder of the perils of using springy devices to propel ourselves skyward. [NBA.com]...
Wizards, Donuts, Knives, And Cannibalistic Fruits
Boner from Growing Pains committed suicide last week, and that left me sad. More important, it made me remember that I used to watch that show religiously, and spent a great deal of my childhood imaging that I was Mike Seaver. There was one episode where Carol brings home some new friend: a smoking ...
Well, That AI/Philly Reunion Was Fun
The Sixers announced Allen Iverson won't return to the team, ostensibly to spend time with his ailing daughter. Then why was he in Charlotte over the weekend, partying it up with Jermaine Dupri? [Philly Daily News]...
Al Jefferson Busted For DWI, Maybe Definitely
Certainly, some Al Jefferson with the same birthday as the Wolves center got pulled over and charged with a DWI last night. If Rand says it's so, then it's so. [Hennepin County Sheriff]...