nba Page 717 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Iraqis Now Using Favre-Based Warfare
Iraqi militants have resorted to the lowest sort of psychological tactics in an attempt to break down our soldiers: bringing up Brett Favre....

Jayson Williams Saga May Finally Be Over
According to the AP, Jayson Williams (yes, that one) has accepted a plea deal that will send him to jail for at least 18 months for the accidental shooting of Costas Christofi in 2002....

Sports Cards Can Still Make You Rich, Pathetic
Two private card collectors swapped a pristine Michael Jordan rookie card and a $200,000 check, but wait until you hear what exciting plans the new owner of the card has in store. Absolutely nothing!...

Where The Wild Oden Are
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Massachusetts Has Exactly 1500 Celtics Fans
The Celtics license plate finally hit the magic number of orders to be produced. All it took was three years and a title to find the 1500 people necessary....

Who Says There's Nothing To Do In Oklahoma City?
You're young, rich, one of the most talented players on the planet. If you're Kevin Durant, how do you spend your days off? Getting into slapfights, and filming them....

Timberwolves GM Wants Fans To Know He Is Aware Of How Much Team Sucks
Mired in a nine-game slide, the Timberwolves are struggling to get acclimated to Kurt Rambis' triangle offense. Further, the team stinks. So, GM David Kahn did the only sensible thing - he wrote a letter to the team's 10 fans....

LeBron James Pays Fitting Tribute To Jordan, Gives Fans New Overpriced Jersey To Buy
LeBron plans to surrender his No. 23 in MJ's honor. The real tribute here is less in the number change than in the shrewd business sense to introduce some No. 6 LeBron merch a month before Christmas....

Please Don't Mention Eggs To Mike McCarthy. Ever.
The Packers fired a 22-year Lambeau Field employee because coach Mike McCarthy thought he heard the guy tell him, "Don't lay an egg." That sounds about right. I wonder if the Metrodome is hiring? [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]...

Steve Nash: NBA Optometrist
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Brave Peacemaker Of Casino Cafeteria Chair-Throwing Lady Brawl Rewarded With NBA Assistant Job
Yes, Tim Floyd, has been hired to be part of the Charlotte Hornets staff after the firing of head coach Byron Scott. GM Jeff Bower is now head coach. [Yahoo!]...

No One Likes Donald Sterling, Part 783 (UPDATE)
The league has no plans to discipline, comment on or even cough pointedly in the direction of Sterling, so activists are passing around a protest petition that David Stern can blithely ignore, too. Faaantastic!...

Tomorrow: Live Chat With A <em>Sports Illustrated</em> Writer Who's Actually Familiar With The Internet
Chris Ballard, SI wordsmith and author of The Art of a Beautiful Game: The Thinking Fan's Tour of the NBA will be here (and not some Geocities page at the far end of the Internet) at 1 p.m. Join us....

The Aaron Rodgers "Sack Tracker" Is Why We Have An Internet
What your life needs now is a detailed interactive chart of all 37 sacks made on the Packers QB this season. I think it was just updated as Rodgers was taken down buying lunch at Quiznos. [Madison.com]...

Zach Randolph's Head Continues To Wreak Havoc
Just seven games into his pro career, Grizzlies rookie Hasheem Thabeet breaks his jaw after running into his teammate's rather prodigious melon. Can you eat Memphis BBQ through a straw? [Photo via Memphis Commercial Appeal]...

He Got You, My Pretty
Former Wisconsin Badger Darin Schubring lost a bar fight was sucker-punched by a man wearing a Flying Monkey costume. That's slightly more embarrassing than being referred to, 25 years later, as "Baraboo local legend." But only slightly. [Baraboo News Republic]...

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar Has Rare Form Of Leukemia
Tell your old man to drag chronic myeloid leukemia up and down the floor for the last year. The good news is that Kareem got a sponsorship deal with the company that makes his medication, so free drugs! [NYTimes/ESPN]...

Kiss Dick Bavetta Goodbye?
Bavetta, the Barkley-kissing ref suspected of involvement in pretty much every conspiracy dating back to the assassination of Caesar, says he might retire at season's end. At least, that's what David Stern told him to say. [Orlando Sentinel, via Slam]...

Ever Dream Of Shaq? You're Not Alone
In the grand tradition of experimental Dirk Nowitzki fiction, we bring you something we can't explain. Student art project? Ramblings of a madman? Signs of the impending Ashaqalypse? Check your sanity at the door....

Finally, Kobe Bryant Accomplishes Something
By scoring 41 points last night, Bryant became the youngest player ever to reach 24,000 points. The commenter who best incorporates this into an anal sex joke gets a +1 or whatever is behind Door No. 3. [USA Today]...