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Watch As Clay Hensley Takes Out His Frustration On A Water Bucket
It was only the third inning and the Marlins were still winning, but there were still no outs when Clay Hensley hit Ruben Tejada with a pitch and walked Lucas Duda with the bases loaded. After Hensley's 1-1 pitch to David Wright nearly sailed into Wright's chest, Jack McKeon just couldn't take it an...

Fred Taylor Retires A Jaguar, But How Much Does His One-Day Contract Pay?
"There are no dumb questions." That was a promising way for the Jaguars' representative to open the conversation when he returns my call regarding what I presumed was a dumb, dumb question....

Today In Shameless Corporate Behavior: The Redskins Hawk Obsolete Donovan McNabb Souvenir Cups
First, Dan Snyder sold Redskins fans the old peanuts he got from a bankrupt airline, as Dave McKenna mentions in "The Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder." (You have just experienced "We Are All Dave McKenna CCX.") Now Snyder is charging fans at FedExField $6 for Donovan McNabb soda cups. Oh, ...

Whoever Broke Into Chris Cooley's Art Gallery Did Not Care Much For The Art
Local police in Leesburg, Va. are searching for the suspect that broke into Chris Cooley's art gallery on South King Street early Friday morning. Thankfully, no art or pottery was stolen in the burglary. More importantly, though, Chris Cooley owns an art gallery....

Couch Burning Is No Longer Encouraged At West Virginia
WVU students burn couches. They burn them because the basketball team won. They burn them because the football team won. They burn them because the football team lost. They burn them because Bin Laden was killed. They burn them because it snowed. WVU students burn couches. It's what they do....

11-Year-Old Does Not Get $50,000 For Impossible Shot Hockey Shot, But Gets Next Best Thing: Nothing
We once again check in with Nick and Nate Smith, the young twins who won a raffle to take a shot from center ice for $50,000. Nick's name was drawn; Nate took the shot. Almost immediately it became clear that the insurance company didn't want to pay out, and today it's official....

Matt Cassel's Burden Is Heavier Than Anyone Imagined
Your morning roundup for Sept. 2, the day after we didn't have any change to toss into Bruce Springsteen's guitar case. Photo courtesy @IndianPacker, via @Sportsfeeder1. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The Boston Pro Lacrosse Team With A Mascot Who Loved Lap Dances Has Suspended Operations
Boston Blazers President and GM Doug Reffue announced — in a letter to "the Blazers community" on the team website — that the three-year-old National Lacrosse League franchise was temporarily closing up shop. They're looking "both locally and nationally" for a new home for the 2013 season....

So This Is What A Brawl In An Emergency Room Waiting Room Looks Like
Right about the time you think that this spectacle in an unnamed hospital's waiting room is over (about 2:15 in), the hair- and wifebeater-yanking commences. And yes, it seems like the guy in the blue-and-white striped shirt likes hitting women. So there's that, too....

Presenting A Great Point From Novak Djokovic's U.S. Open Match Against Some Guy Tonight
At the end of this crowd-rousing point tonight at Arthur Ashe Stadium, No. 1 seed Novak Djokovic was four games away from a triple-bagel win (6-0, 6-0, 6-0) over Carlos Berlocq. Novak would drop the next game — earning Berlocq some crowd adulation — and another before closing his foe out, but he a...

Jockey Who Drove His Car Into A Race Track Security Guard Was Not Permitted To Ride Horses Today
Last night, Hall of Fame jockey Kent Desormeaux is said to have intentionally driven his silver 2003 Porsche Carrera into a lady "peace officer" in the Saratoga Race Course parking lot. Bad form, yo....

Yeah, Ryan Braun Is Still Hearing About His Failed Inside-The-Park Home Run Trot
Last night, it was video of Reggie Miller watching Ryan Braun of the Brewers falling face first after rounding third....

This Tip About Scantily Clad German Soccer Ladies Totally Buried The Lede
Anybody with a set of eyes would surely agree that that picture of "Mona of BV Sturm Wissel" is a compelling image. In and of itself, it justifies tipster Tomuban's signal to check out a "Women footballers heat up the pitch for [sexy 2012 pin-up] calendar" link....

Here's Video Of A Ref Getting Gang-Jumped During A Florida Youth Football Game
What you're about to see is what happened when things got out of hand when the Sarasota Gators faced the North Port Huskies at Riverview High School. It wasn't so much the Huskies, though. It was pretty much all Gators....

The First Announcer Flub Of The College-Football Season Arrived After Just 21:28 Of Game Time
Don't know who's in the ESPNU booth for the Louisville/Murray State game, but the guy's flat-out right. Players should not worry about play cocks, what with so much else going on in the first game of the season....

Holy Balls Christina McHale Is Ripped Too
Photographer Paul Frederiksen points out that Marion Bartoli's opponent, 19-year-old American Christina McHale, also has a Hulk arm. What deserves credit for this phenomenon? It may just be that the backhand shot is especially flattering to muscle definition—or it may just be that the rest of the wo...

The Wall Street Journal Counted How Many Times Mike Pelfrey Licked His Pitching Hand Tuesday Night
And the answer, over the course of six-plus innings, is 89. The story also notes that "there are two variations of the Pelfrey lick," though it doesn't go so far as to actually chart the two-finger and four-finger versions. [WSJ]...

Independent Investigation Reveals Two Key Causes Of Vancouver Riot
"[T]here were too many people and they were too drunk." [NHL.com]...

Al Golden Bites His Tongue, Says Miami Suspensions Are Fair
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: despite all this, Golden would not rather be back at Temple....

Gael Monfils Took The Tennis Trick Shot To A New Level Today
Monfils and Juan Carlos Ferrero are currently deadlocked in the second round at the U.S. Open. Ferrero took the first set, 7-6 (5), Monfils took the second at 7-5, and Ferrero is up 6-5 in the third. Monfils, though, got the psychological (and bullshit) advantage with this trick shot early on....