new Page 1130 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Girl, 12, Throws Perfect Game, Is Called Up By Mets
The taunting rings in your ears and burns like fire, and will for years. A girl pitched a perfect game against your Little League team, and you struck out three times. Nelson Muntz approves....
ESPN Headline Writers Are Witty Rapscallions
Well isn't that special. But in ESPN's defense, there's probably not a whole lot you can do with news like this. [ESPN]...
Big Papi Fires Warning Shot Over Joba's Bow
Their series doesn't begin until tomorrow, but David Ortiz thought he'd get in a preemptive strike today against Joba Chamberlain and the Yankees. Hey Joba, please don't throw at our noggins....
Which Of These Nightmare Fuels Will Be The New St. John's Mascot?
What, no giant talking beer keg? St. John's has a storied and troubled history when it comes to mascots, and the current vote to find a new one is not going to help, it appears....
Freddie Sez Has About Had It With High Ticket Prices
So yeah, there are plenty of those high-priced corporate seats that are empty at Yankee Stadium this season. But here's the real tragedy: Freddie Sez can't get in!...
New Baseball Franchise Attempts To Hitch Its Wagon To Stephen Colbert's Star (Update)
The new Frontier League baseball team in Normal, Ill., needs a nickname, and it's up to you to rock the vote. Of course they're secretly hoping you'll opt for option "C."...
Yes, Hockey Does Have Buzzer-Beaters
After giving up a 3-goal lead, Carolina beats New Jersey on a slap shot with 0.2 seconds left in the game, which I guess is not a lot of time remaining.[NHL]...
How Clemens' Retirement May Have Single-Handedly Sunk The Housing Market
At this rate there are going to be more books on Roger Clemens than on Abraham Lincoln ... and why not? Lincoln never kept apartments in 12 different cities for all of his women....
Mets Fans Give Thanks For One More Thing To Complain About
The Great Doc Gooden Autograph Controversy is mercifully at an end, the Mets having reversed field on the issue after getting an earful in a glorious media/fan backlash....
"Moneyball" Author Has A Small Penis, Cruel Family
"Daddy has a small penis!" That's according to his toddler daughter, who likes to let everyone at her day care center know that fact about her father. [NYP]...
Doc Gooden: Wanton CitiField Graffiti Outlaw
Apparently Felix Unger is now in charge of stadium operations at CitiField. Hey, it's a brand new stadium! Don't write on the walls! Even if you've won a Cy Young Award and your name is Doc Gooden....
Alexander Ovechkin Would Have Made A Lousy Cold War Spy
The Captials star was booted from the Rangers practice today "'because they're afraid of me,' he said with a smile." Really? Which of your first two home losses scared them the most? [NYPost]...
This New Detroit Lion Logo Should Fix Everything
The rumors are true. It seems that the new Lions logo that "leaked" awhile back is legit and a new typeface and squiggly lines will soon usher in a glorious new era of Detroit football....
Sidney Crosby Gets The Philadelphia Salute; Deadspin Almost Falls Apart
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Meet Your Weekend Deadspin Guest Editor, In The Most "Weekend" Sense Of The Term
I'm Moe, and contrary to what some of you seem to be insinuating, I haven't smoked weed in such a long time you would probably have to carbon-date my urine to find any trace....
Oy! Jets Schedule Conflicts With High Holidays
All that kvetching and gnashing of teeth you hear is because Jewish New York Jets fans may have to miss a quarter of their team's home games due to an NFL scheduling mixup....
A.J. Burnett Is The Most Dominating Pitcher In Baseball Right Now
The fears about his elbow disintegrating into a pile of bony ash midway through the season are set aside for now. Burnett flirted with a no-no, flummoxed the Rays, wins 7-2. [NYT]...
The Queen Of Queens
America's Sideline Princess became America's Baseline Princess, spending most of last night's Citi Field opener giving fans an extensive tour of the new ballpark, while slack-jawed yokels stood idly by and tried not to drool....
Nick Swisher To The Rescue
The Yankees off-season pitching additions are starting to pay-off. Swisher's line yesterday: 1.0IP 1H 0R 1K. Unfortunately they lost to the DRays 15-5. [3:10 To Joba]...
Easter In New Zealand Seems Festive
When there's a "Great Easter Bunny Hunt" in America it usually involves laughing children carrying wicker baskets filled with Cadbury eggs. But in New Zealand it involves 14,799 bloody bunny carcasses....