new Page 271 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Wilson Kipsang Could Be $500K Richer For A Shit Run In London '13
The World Marathon Majors, which consist of Tokyo, London, Boston, Berlin, Chicago, and New York, crown a champion every year based on overall placing during a two-year period. It is as unintelligible and confusing as it sounds. That being said, the WMM does dole out a half-million dollars to its tw...

Anthony Davis Still Improving Should Terrify Opponents
LeBron James's return to Cleveland was the biggest story of the 2014 NBA offseason, but in the not-so-distant future we may be referring to it instead as the summer of Anthony Davis. With almost none of America's big stars playing in the FIBA Basketball World Cup, the 21(!) year old power forward an...

Radio Host Mike Francesa Rants About The Jets For Over Seven Minutes
The shit-ass Jets are 1-7 after getting smoked by the Buffalo Bills in a game that featured many grand embarrassments from the home team, so today was the perfect day for Mike Francesa to unleash a merciless rant about just how crappy this team is....

Dear America: Quit Flipping Out About Gluten
"A third of American adults say that they are trying to eliminate [gluten] from their diets," reports The New Yorker, in a long feature about our culture's weirdening relationship with this common protein composite. This is insane. Americans are insane....

Oh Nothing, Just Taylor Swift Hanging Out With Her Pals From The Knicks
Taylor Swift is the new Queen of New York, or something, so she went to Madison Square Garden to hang out with Carmelo Anthony and Amar'e Stoudemire. They probably talked about how great it is to be a New Yorker. In 20 years, graffiti murals of this image will grace brick walls throughout New York's...

Overgrown Second-Grader Rob Gronkowski Looks Healthy As Hell
The Patriots rolled over the Bears, and Rob Gronkowski, the Incredible Hulk's younger, more outgoing brother, was a big reason why. The tight end played a great job today....

Robert Kraft Loves His Players A Little Too Much
Here's a tender moment between Patriots owner Bob Kraft and Vince Wilfork. It's sweet, and totally common for owners to share intimacy with their employees....

Jets Employ Man Whose Job Is To Open Percy Harvin's Gatorade Bottle?
(We seriously have no idea why this man came over and opened Percy Harvin's Gatorade bottle.)...

Geno Smith's First Quarter Performance, In One Vine
Jets quarterback Geno Smith got yanked after a first quarter performance for the ages. If you missed his spectacular display of passing, we made a Vine for you:...

You Get Three Questions Before Bill Belichick Changes The Subject
On Tuesday, Darrelle Revis was late to work, so Bill Belichick sent him home—or at least held him out of practice. It wasn't exactly clear. In his first time meeting with the media since then, Belichick was not about to make things any clearer....

TV Anchor Warns New Yorkers To Not Eat Maybe Ebola-Infected Poop
Bad news, y'all: Ebola is in New York. You may think you're screwed. You may think this is the only logical conclusion to Obama's America. You may even be right. Luckily, NY1's Errol Louis knows how to fight this plague: If you're prone to putting random feces in your mouth, don't do that for a wh...

What This Woman Did For An Aging Basketball Player Will Warm Your Heart
Illuminada Magtoto, a 90-year-old Miami resident, recently gave back to her community by agreeing to play in a one-on-one game with Dwyane Wade, an inspiring local man who refuses to let his old age and withered body stand in the way of his dream of playing in the NBA....


Video Finally Surfaces Of Willis Reed Fighting The Entire Lakers Team
Everybody knows about Knicks center Willis Reed's legendary walk onto the court for warmups before Game 7 of the 1970 NBA Finals, a game he wasn't supposed to play. Reed only made two shots in 27 minutes, but as Bob Ryan said in the linked SportsCentury documentary: "The spiritualism of the mome...

Kyle Orton Was The Most Pivotal Quarterback In Week 7
According to data from Brian Burke of Advanced Football Analytics, Kyle Orton had three of the NFL's top five most positive plays of the week on the Bills' game-winning drive. ...

Jeremy Kerley Seems Excited About His New Contract With The Jets
"Uhhhh ... yayyyyy."...

Jesus Christ Ditches His Wife At An Oklahoma Restaurant
A woman has been jailed on a charge of fraud after her husband, Jesus Christ, fooled her into ordering food she couldn't pay for at a restaurant....

Escaped NYC Carriage Horse Hassled By The Fuckin' Pigs
This extremely chill carriage horse escaped from his oppressors in New York City this weekend, and proceeded to take advantage of his freedom by going on a morning jaunt down 11th Avenue. ...

