new Page 553 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
San Diegans Who Tuned In To Their CBS Affiliate For The Morning News Instead Found Some Dude's Balls [Probably NSFW]
San Diego CBS affiliate KFMB's morning news features a regular segment with shitty "morning zoo" jocks from the local megacorp-owned mass communication dinosaur that is an FM radio station. Usually these segments are unfunny, marginally offensive, and interesting only to those who have suffered br...
<em>SI:</em> Jovan Belcher And Kasandra Perkins Had A House Full Of Guns, And Belcher Was Joking About Them On Friday Night
Jovan Belcher and Kasandra Perkins kept "about eight guns" in their house and liked to go shooting together, according to a new report from Sports Illustrated. SI talked to Reggie Paramoure, a former teammate of Belcher's at Maine, and Paramoure provided them with a text-message exchange he had with...
Report: Arkansas Will Hire Wisconsin's Bret Bielema To Be Its Football Coach
Yahoo's Pat Forde was first with the news a few minutes ago that Bret Bielema will be leaving Wisconsin for Arkansas. This follows a bizarre day in which Mike Gundy's and Chris Petersen's names kept getting bounced around. Bielema had gone 68-24 in Madison and coached the Badgers to three consecutiv...
What Will Football Look Like 50 Years From Now?
I'm sick this week, and when you have children being sick is the BEST. You don't have to do jack shit. You can go nap. You can mainline chicken broth directly into your wrist. You can opt out of bath duty and dish duty and garbage duty. The other parent has to do all the work. It's awesome. It's lik...
![Braylon Edwards Apologizes For Being Supportive Of Mark Sanchez [Updates]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/187c45furw4u6jpg.jpg)
Braylon Edwards Apologizes For Being Supportive Of Mark Sanchez [Updates]
Earlier today, we poked fun at the fact that Braylon Edwards decided to rush to the defense of former teammate and buttfumbler Mark Sanchez. Now, Edwards has apologized for his "emotional outburst," and proven himself to be very bad at completing his thoughts....
How My Career Ended: I Threw The Most Famous Block In NFL History But Couldn't Open A Hole In My Contract
Tell Me When It's Over is an interview series in which we ask former athletes about the moment they knew their playing days were over (among other things). Today: five-time All-Pro guard Jerry Kramer, the man who delivered the key block in one of the NFL's greatest games. ...
"Here Comes Rudolph On The Outside": Three Deer Wander Onto Racetrack, Run A Couple Laps
The action had to be halted at Meadows Racetrack in western Pennsylvania last Wednesday, as three lost deer somehow found their way onto the track. They poked around the final turn before bolting the wrong way around the track. Then, on the backstretch, they stopped and turned around. It went like...
Darnell Dockett Might Have Spit In Kerry Rhodes's Face During The Jets Game
Down a point and the clock running out, the Cardinals had one and only one chance to win the game: Intentionally the Jets score a touchdown, and get the ball back with two minutes left. The Arizona defense did what it had to, parting like the Red Sea for Shonn Greene. But Greene smartly slid at the ...
Georgia Woman Exposes Self, Molests Bar Patrons While Watching SEC Championship Game
Watching a big football game at a bar can be fun. You get to drink beer, cheer loudly, and share in the joy of victory or the pain of defeat with other like-minded fans. That experience is probably what patrons of El Jinete and Friends Sports Grill (!) in Dacula, Ga., were looking for when they set...
Fan Yells Out "Mashed Potatoes" During Graeme McDowell's Shot; McDowell Tells Him To Go Jerk It
Graeme McDowell won for the first time in two years when he closed out the World Challenge at Sherwood Country Club in Thousand Oaks, Calif., on Sunday. On McDowell's approach shot on 16, someone in the gallery yelled out "mashed potatoes!"—which will never not be funny....
Good News, Mark Sanchez: You Still Have One Fan In The NFL. Bad News: It's Braylon Edwards.
Braylon Edwards, who is currently a useless member of the Seattle Seahwaks, used to be semi-relevant when he played for the New York Jets. As such, Edwards has strong opinions about the current state of the Jets franchise, specifically the struggles of Mark "Buttfumble" Sanchez....
Israeli Basketball Star Suspended For Calling Opponent A Nazi
Basketball trash-talking is universal, but there's a line. Guy Pnini, the captain of Israeli basketball's most famous and most successful team, genocided the fuck out of that line on Sunday, as his Maccabi Tel Aviv hosted crosstown rivals Hapoel....
They Caught The Vikings Fan Who Wore A Purple Sombrero And Knocked Out A 50-Year-Old Man Outside Lambeau
This is Mark Swanson, from Lakeland, Minn. He was involved in the big brawl outside Lambeau Field after the Packers beat the Vikings, but if you were there you probably don't recognize him from his mug shot. That's because, according to police, he was wearing a large purple sombrero and a Vikings po...
On Browns Call-In Show, Caller Asks Who Has The Biggest Penis; Hosts Break Down Giggling
Browns Red Zone airs Mondays on SportsTime Ohio. The hosts—Jim Donovan, Tony Grossi, and Doug Dieken, break down the previous day's game, and take calls from viewers who want to discuss the Browns. It's basically televised sports radio, and like radio, sometimes prank callers make it through the s...
Animated Infographic: Watch As America's Stadiums Pile Up On The Backs Of Taxpayers Through The Years
When Jeffrey Loria decided to once again blow up his Marlins, it sparked a brief outrage over the $500 million in public money that had been spent on the team's brand new stadium. These outrages happen every couple years or so and are forgotten in time for the next bond issue. Public financing of st...
By The End Of Last Night's Loss To Washington, Eli Manning Was A Spaced-Out Zombie
The Washington Redskins held on for a 17-16 home win over the Giants last night in a win that had team owner and legendary shitweasel Dan Snyder claiming "I hate those motherfuckers."...
Haunting New Details Emerge In The Jovan Belcher Murder-Suicide
The Kansas City Star has an exclusive story with chilling new details concerning the final moments of both Kasandra Perkins and Jovan Belcher, gleaned from multiple police sources as the investigation continues....
Dan Snyder Celebrates Win Over Giants With Characteristic Grace And Civility
Big win for the Redskins Monday night over the Giants. They are now 3-1 in the division, just one game behind the Giants....
Giants Lineman Sean Locklear Used To Have A Right Knee: Giants-Redskins In Four GIFs
Washington 17, New York Giants 16: Ugh, so gross. Moving on. The Giants could have gone a long way to wrapping up the division while also taking the air out of the Washington sails, but no. The Redskins are right in the thick of things despite...let's call it an unorthodox first scoring drive....