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A Grizzlies Fan Put His Fingers Where They Don't Belong On Marc Gasol
This... this is not appropriate....

Matt Hendricks's Hit On Ryan McDonagh Was Playoff Hockey At Its Best
We say it all the time: the Stanley Cup Playoffs are the best postseason in sports. Tonight's Capitals-Rangers game is headed to the second overtime, a fitting outcome in this year's OT-happy postseason, but the extended game hasn't dialed down any of the intensity....

Red Sox Sign Mark Prior, Ready To Party Like It's 2003
It's hard to believe that despite all the comeback attempts from former Cubs pitcher Mark Prior, he hasn't actually pitched in the Major Leagues since the summer of 2006. Since then, he's tried to latch on with the Padres, Yankees, and Rangers, never once making it to The Show. Now the Red Sox are t...

Tim Welke Demonstrated Why "The Human Element" Is A Pathetic Joke
Tim Welke's the embodiment of the "human element" defense of baseball's reliance on live umpiring and reluctance to use replay except in specific situations. Indeed, it was that phrase he used in his letter to Sports Illustrated complaining about the use of his picture in their "Kill The Ump" iss...

The Worst Summer Movies: The Ones Your Mom Will Like
Somewhere in the world, maybe in a dusty old rotting liberal-arts faculty lounge, maybe in the office where they make that McSweeney's-Grantland Quarterly thing, someone is really excited about The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. It's a "light" comedy opening Friday that stars Judi Dench, Bill Nighy, Ma...

Papiss Cissé Enters His Bid For Premiership Goal Of The Season
Newcastle won its first match at Stamford Bridge since 1986 with a shocker of a 2-0 victory over Chelsea, keyed by Papiss Cissé's two goals—the second of which is a strong challenger to Peter Crouch for EPL goal of the season....

Another Sarah Phillips Scam: "I'm A Writer For ESPN And I Have A Plan To Take Over The World"
On Tuesday, Sarah Phillips took to Twitter. She told us she was 22. She said she's happy that she's no longer involved in sports media....

An Italian Soccer Manager Punched His Own Player In The Face During The Match
Fiorentina manager Delio Rossi attacked player Adem Ljajic during today's match against Novara, taking offense to Ljajic's sarcastic applause after Rossi substituted for him early in the match. Ljajic—who just last week was considered a lock for a transfer to Arsenal—was apparently in poor form as...

Holy Crap, Jeremy Affeldt's Son Is Huge
Giants lefty specialist Jeremy Affeldt suffered another freak injury on Saturday, spraining his MCL. He's now on the 15-day disabled list. That's not the story here. This is:...

Iowa Girl Takes Life-Sized Cardboard Cutout Of Tim Tebow To Prom
Rachel Bird of Kingsley, Iowa, didn't have a date for her prom on Saturday. She really wanted to go with Tim Tebow. She tried asking him to go via Twitter. She tried contacting his agent. She also tried the Jets. Nothing....

Fabrice Muamba Returned To Reebok Stadium For Today's Bolton-Tottenham Match
Six weeks after suffering the cardiac arrest that stopped his heart for 78 minutes, Bolton midfielder Fabrice Muamba returned to greet fans and players for today's Bolton-Tottenham Hotspur match at Reebok Stadium. It's fitting for him to come back today, as it was at the Spurs' White Hart Lane Mua...

Sources: Sarah Phillips And Nilesh Prasad Picked Games Together, Scammed People Together, Got Fired From T-Mobile Together
What have we learned about Sarah Phillips, the woman who was apparently scamming people on the Internet when she wasn't writing a column for ESPN.com, in the 24 hours since our story was published? The most interesting bit is that she and her partner, Nilesh Prasad, apparently engaged in some low-gr...
![Former NFL Linebacker Junior Seau Found Dead, Suicide Suspected [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17len5ydjdreojpg.jpg)
Former NFL Linebacker Junior Seau Found Dead, Suicide Suspected [UPDATE]
According to TMZ, there was a shooting at the Oceanside, California, home of former NFL linebacker Junior Seau. TMZ says that multiple sources have confirmed to them that Seau was found dead inside his home. Seau was 43 years old. ...

History Is Bunk, When The <em>New York Times</em> Writes It About The Yankees
Two of the worst things in sports are Yankees homerism and New York Times writers who want to impress people. Put them together, and you get the Times's Mark Viera, coming off the sports department bench to gloat in yesterday's paper about the Yankees' 2-1 win over the Orioles the night before. His ...

The NFL Suspended Some Of The Saints Defense For 2012, But, On The Bright Side, They Weren't Good Anyway
The word came down not so long ago from Roger Goodell's mountaintop: Saints middle linebacker Jonathan Vilma will sit out the whole season, and end Will Smith misses four games. Ex-Saint tackle Anthony Hargrove, now with the Packers, gets eight games, and Scott Fujita, now on the Browns, gets three....

Most NFL Players Aren't Happy With The Latest Saints Suspensions, Surprising Nobody
Roger Goodell handed down the suspension of four Saints today for their involvement in the bounty program that initially led to multiple suspensions among the coaching staff and front office. Most notably, linebacker Jonathan Vilma is out for the year, and defensive end Anthony Hargrove is gone for ...

Today's Lesson In Sportsmanship Comes From The Islamic Republic of Iran
On a day when we learn of the lengthy suspensions handed down to New Orleans Saints players amidst the bounty scandal, here's a palate cleanser of sportsmanship (or, as they like to call it in the soccer world, Fair Play) that took place yesterday in Dubai....

Bryce Harper Shows Off His Arm Cannon, Gets Screwed By Umpire
Recreational softball phenom Bryce Harper is making quite the impression on the DC fan base during his debut fortnight in The Show. (They're not really going to send him back down to AAA, are they?) First, it was making good with the locals during a softball game on the Mall, and in lieu of raking a...

Report: Half Of Amar'e Stoudemire's Hand Was Just "Hanging Off"
That's what a source who witnessed the incident told ESPN's Chris Broussard:...

America's Shaquilles Are Coming Of Age
There are three separate players named Shaquille in the Rivals 150 prospect rankings, and this is no accident. The Millennials are done. It's time for Generation Shaquille....