nf Page 1112 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
In Which We Attempt To Translate British Journalism
If the English language isn't yet universal, then the verse of sports should be. I've never understood, then, why it is that I can't comprehend a word of 19th-century British newspapers....
Jeremy Mayfield Goes To War Against NASCAR And His "Whore" Stepmom
As noted last night, NASCAR says that Jeremy Mayfield failed another drug test, but he has fired back with even more outrageous countercharges—like implying NASCAR's chairman is on drugs and flat-out accusing his stepmother of murdering his father....
Minnesota Media Treating Favre's (Pending? Inevitable?) Arrival With Restraint
The Minneapolis Star-Tribune isn't missing out on an opportunity to set purple hearts aflutter, so they've decided the best way to satisfy their wild-eyed readers infected with Favre Fever is to dedicate an entire section to him....
Jeff Garlin: “This Is The Longest Rape Has Ever Been A Topic For Anything I’ve Ever Discussed”
This week's Deadcast guest is "Curb Your Enthusiasm" co-star and producer Jeff Garlin (Listen here, iTunes here, buy Jeff's standup DVD here). We talk rape! Far more than Jeff prefers!...
Is That A Threat, Detroit?
The Lions ill-advisedly offer to let their fans relive 0-16, anytime they want. Gee, thanks. [H/T: Reader Tim]...
Back And To The Far Right: A Different View Of Obama's First Pitch
The National Review's Andy McCarthy summons the ghost of Jim Garrison. You know you're in for a treat when the bizarre claim that "the sports press is among the media's leftiest precincts" is the sanest thing in here. [NRO]...
Have You Seen This Purple Convertible?
Granted, Carolina linebacker Thomas Davis' $136,000 purple and chrome Caprice Classic really blends into a crowd, but it was stolen last week, so holler if you find it. Must be a lot of Panther-loving Prince fans out there. [WFMB/WRAL]...
Jason Whitlock Vs. Marty B In Racial Flame War ‘09: WHO YA GOT? (UPDATED)
Our favorite oozing pumpkin Jason Whitlock is forging an Enemies List not seen since the last days of Richard Nixon: Selena Roberts, Serena Williams, Hamstring Stretches, etc....
Diana Taurasi Was Really, Really Drunk
So says the Phoenix PD. The Mercury guard blew a .17 and was going 55 in a 35 on the night she was pinched. She's pleading not guilty to any and all "extreme" DUI charges. [SI/AP]...
Good Samaritan Gives Tom Brady His Much Needed $4,000
After hearing about the plight of an ex-con, panhandling to re-pay $4,000 to the Patriots' quarterback, a kind businessman has volunteered to pay the debt on his behalf—keeping Tom Brady blissfully unaware that anything has gone wrong....
Robert Lunn Leaves Austria With His Dignity (Mostly) Intact
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UConn. He graduated in 2008 and was playing professional football in Pörtschach, Austria. Sadly, he's back in the U.S. now, so this is his final column....
Nicole Bobek Made Fast Friends In Prison
The New York Daily News published a comprehensive rise-and-fall on the meth-peddling former figure skater but NJ.com gets the real gravy: Bobek endeared herself to inmates through tube-top wizardry. [NJ.com]...
Nice, But He Still Gets An Asterisk For Doing It Against The Padres
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
GUEST RANT: The Flea-Flicker
Since this is the biggest sports audience I will probably ever have, I might as well go public with my longstanding NFL rant: the flea-flicker is not a trick-play. It's a play-fake. And it should be called once a quarter....
Tom Brady Has No Pity For Panhandling Fools
Not all panhandlers are drunks and bums. Some are just convicted bank robbers who happen to owe Tom Brady — yes, that one — a good chunk of change for tucking and running away with two flower planters....
This Week In Terrible Music: The Cowboys’ Nu Metal Band, Plus Chickenfoot
You may have heard that Cowboys' o-lineman Marc Colombo, Leonard Davis, and Cory Procter started their own metal band called Free Reign. Is their music as awful as you think it is? SURE IS!...
Ochocinco's Forebearer Is... Justin Gimelstob?
Chad Ochocinco — né Johnson, he of no further introduction — and Justin Gimelstob, he of middling tennis stature, have more in common than what hits the eye. Actually, they really don't. But they both... like Twitter?...
Donte' Stallworth Out Of Jail
Remember how grumpy you were when you heard that Donte' Stallworth only got 30 days in jail for DUI manslaughter? Well, he was just released after only serving 24 of them. Just in time for a three-day weekend! [ESPN]...
Chad Ochocinco Tweets By His Own Rules
Ochocinco: "I'm using Twitter during games." NFL: No, you're not. Ochocinco: "Damn NFL and these rules, I am going by my own set of rules, I ain't hurting nobody or getting in trouble, I am putting my foot down!!" [PFT]...
The LPGA Continues To Ratchet Up The Crazy
The next time I'm hacking away on my local muni, I'm going to pretend like I'm snowboarding, because that's what Italian golfer Giulia Sergas does. Imaginary frostbite nipping at my windwhipped nose, I'll fit right in with the LPGA....