nf Page 358 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kirk Cousins Isn’t Worth A Shit
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
New York Giants Get Tired Of Mike Francesa Telling Them They Stink, Cut Ties With His Show
Mike Francesa has really stepped in it this time. The sleepy goofus had a standing weekly interview with New York Giants head coach Pat Shurmur every Monday on WFAN, but the relationship between grouchy radio host and grouchy organization has reached its breaking point. Shurmur said today he will no...
Stop Celebrating Bruce Bochy's 2,000th Victory
Bruce Bochy nailed down his iconic 2,044th victory as a major-league manager Wednesday in Boston, because let’s face it, nothing says greatness quite like a large round number. And if 2,044 isn’t round enough for you, then your entire life has been a lie....
Join Us In Pretending Not To Know What Chris Mortensen's Rat Tweets Are About
Yesterday, ESPN’s Chris Mortensen tweeted out a series of rat emojis. ...
Antonio Brown And The Conversation Nobody Wants To Have
I watched the NFL on CBS this Sunday because I knew they had no choice but to talk about Antonio Brown. Brown was sued earlier this week by a former trainer, Britney Taylor, who said that Brown sexually assaulted and raped her when she worked for him. The day before, Brown had been signed by the New...
Seattle Sounders Fans Walk Out Of Match Due To MLS Ban Of Protest Signs
Following months of ideological clashing and semantic disagreements on the meaning of the word “political,” the largest Seattle Sounders supporter group took a more disruptive approach to its fight against MLS’s ban on protest signs, represented most clearly by those bearing the Iron Front logo. Aft...
Let's Move The 49ers, Again
I am not among those of my era who are amazed that the Rolling Stones are still touring energetically at carbon-dateable age, but I know I am in the minority here, and I recognize power when I see it. So when the Stones condemned their recent experience playing the 49ers’ stadium, the implication wa...
Should A Home Run Automatically End An Inning?
I will not keep you waiting for an answer on this one. No, absolutely not and under no circumstances would it be a good idea for a homer to automatically end an inning in a big league baseball game. It seems important not to equivocate on this question. And yet this Funbag question, from a listener ...
Rolling Stones, San Francisco 49ers, City Of Santa Clara All Extremely Mad At Each Other
The Mercury News has published a surprisingly entertaining story about a three-way spat currently raging between the Rolling Stones, the San Francisco 49ers, and the city of Santa Clara. The fight is over various logistical headaches that come with trying to put on a concert at the Niners’ stadium, ...
Donald Trump: We Love Bill Belichick, Don't We, And Also Curing AIDS?
There are two versions of President Donald Trump that appear in public. They both inhabit the same body—the same Youppi-shaped torso pitched forward at the same implausible angles, same ghost-pale eyelids fluttering alarmingly, same resplendent candyfloss Kangol of hair stuck on top of it like a wei...
Laura Ingraham Schooled By Benjamin Watson In Deeply Satisfying Fox News Segment
I swear that headline up there is not the result of late night Mad Libs. Patriots tight end Benjamin Watson was on Fox News with conservative shithead Laura Ingraham Monday to discuss a recent article by Jemele Hill. It became clear almost immediately that Watson was expected to share Ingraham’s sne...
Kent State Determines Football Team's Pregame Fireworks More Important Than Overtime Field Hockey Game
Saturday’s college field hockey game between Maine and Temple was called off in the middle of play after host school Kent State needed the field to set up pre-game fireworks for the football game next door, per the Bangor Daily News. While the teams were told of a potential scheduling conflict befor...
The Dolphins Aren't Enjoying This Fiasco Any More Than You Are
Dolphins head coach Brian Flores declared on Friday, “I have a good team.” What a difference one game makes, especially when that game was Miami’s 59-10 loss to the Ravens, featuring the most points and the most yards (643) the Dolphins have given up in their history. Brian Flores on Sunday: “We’ve ...
WNBA Referee Walks Into Astou Ndour’s Hand, Delivers Emphatic Ejection
You can’t touch a referee. That’s the rule in basketball and basically every sport. So, the ejection of the Chicago Sky’s Astou Ndour from today’s game against the Washington Mystics was understandable. But the reaction of WNBA ref Kevin Fahey was a bit over the top....
CBS Shows Ads Over The Void After Power Outage Disrupts Chiefs-Jaguars Broadcast
Coming back from a commercial after the Jaguars cut the Chiefs’ lead to 37-19, CBS didn’t return to the game broadcast. In a nihilistic twist, the network kept showing ads over nothing....
Person Caught Saying “I Never Had My Butt Fingered” On NFL Broadcast
The NFL is back, and we already have our biggest storyline of the season: Who said “I never had my butt fingered” on the NBC broadcast of the season’s opening Packers-Bears game?...
Why Is The NFL Giving Money To A Group That Believes Trump Needs To Save Chicago From Gang Violence?
One of the first major moves that the NFL and Roc Nation’s “Inspire Change” program will make is donate $400,000 to two Chicago groups that position themselves as local service organizations aimed at helping keep children in low-income neighborhoods off the streets, according to TMZ. The recipients ...
Football Is The Last Great American Vice
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
Antonio Brown And The Raiders Have Conspired To Ruin Every Goddamn Thing
Let us start with a hearty LOL. The Oakland Raiders traded for downfield savant Antonio Brown during the offseason, handed him $30-plus million in guaranteed money, and now stand ready to piss that investment away in the quickest, most Raiders-like fashion possible. Adam Schefter is now reporting th...
![Report: MLS Escalates Dumb Fan Feud, Suspends Portland Timbers Supporters For Waving Iron Front Banners [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/mylmmnqxumkwspgs1ooi.jpg)
Report: MLS Escalates Dumb Fan Feud, Suspends Portland Timbers Supporters For Waving Iron Front Banners [UPDATE]
MLS has been in a season-long game of chicken with its own fans, and that feud has now entangled one of the more high-profile fanbases in the league. As first reported by ESPN and then confirmed by Portland Timbers supporters group Timbers Army, a “handful” of Portland fans have been banned for thre...