nf Page 536 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Video Of A Guy Executing Fish With A Pistol Is Actually Good Because Lionfish Suck
I think every non-sociopath’s first instinct when seeing the title card of the video above—which lives up to its billing, as this is indeed a four-minute clip of a man equipped with a waterproof Glock who uses it to “fish” for lionfish—is one of dread. Oh no, you worry, accurately. Am I really about...

You Already Know What Mike Ditka Thinks Of Colin Kaepernick, So Let's Just Laugh At His Big Dumb Head
Mike Ditka, a racist porcupine with a perpetual sunburn, has weighed in on the Colin Kaepernick situation. You really don’t need me to tell you exactly what he had to say about Kaepernick, because you already know that Ditka is a rotten old fuck who has been muttering, “If you don’t like America, yo...

The Seahawks Would Like To See White NFL Players Join The National Anthem Protests
In Tulsa, a police officer has been charged with manslaughter in the shooting death of Terence Crutcher. In Charlotte, a curfew and the presence of the National Guard led to mostly peaceful protests after two nights of clashes with riot police, even as the family of Keith Scott called for the public...

The Texans Were Tremendously Incompetent
The Patriots entered tonight’s game against the Texans as slight underdogs at home, despite a history of destroying Houston anytime they had a chance, especially at home. The Patriots were starting a rookie quarterback, the Texans came in hot at 2-0, and Gronk looked banged up, but the Patriots are ...

Chip Kelly Backs Colin Kaepernick, Terrible Columnist Fusses Like A Baby
Press Democrat columnist Lowell Cohn is one of the very worst sportswriters in the business—he’s the dude who once compared PED users to murderers—so it’s no surprise that he has a problem with Colin Kaepernick. In fact, ol’ Lowell is so steamed about this issue that he felt it necessary to lecture ...


New Touchback Rule Designed To Reduce Number Of Kickoff Returns Is Actually Increasing Them<em></em>
I do not like to say I told you so (I love to say it), but all my haters and doubters (there were none) can eat every last speck of my shit. ...

The Ongoing NFL Conspiracy You Don’t Know About<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....

Who To Start? Who To Sit? Fantasy Football Advice For Week Three Is Here.<em></em>
Week three of the NFL season is upon us, and if you’re one of the 75 million fantasy football players in the world, you’re probably wondering who to start and who to sit. Our weekly fantasy football advice column is here to answer all of your questions....

Leonard Williams, We Know What Happened To Your Hookah Parts
Jets defensive lineman Leonard Williams recently ordered some parts for his hookah, but he never got them. Leonard, the cops have your hookah stuff....

Rams Lose Lawsuits To PSL Holders They Left Behind In St. Louis
The Los Angeles Rams will have to offer some former St. Louis personal seat license holders the opportunity to buy season tickets in their new L.A. stadium, as well as refund the deposit for other former personal seat license holders, a federal judge ruled yesterday....

Lone Bright Spot For The Browns Injured Too
The Cleveland Browns, an alleged NFL team, are so thoroughly screwed. Part of this is by design. Part of this is because they’ve suffered a horrific stretch of injuries. RG3 (few people’s idea of a savior) hurt his shoulder, his backup hurt his shoulder, and now the team has to start a rookie next w...

Take Our Survey On Boycotting The NFL And Don't You Dare Lie
Yahoo and YouGov teamed up to survey over a thousand Americans about how they felt about Colin Kaepernick-inspired protests during the national anthem. Though the release is suspiciously light on methodology, the headline finding is that 44 percent of self-identified NFL fans said they would stop wa...

Richard Sherman Addresses Police Killings Of Black Men At Press Conference, Then Walks Out<em></em>
Seattle Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman did not answer questions about his team’s upcoming game against the San Francisco 49ers during a press conference today. Instead, he spoke about the recent deaths of Keith Lamont Scott and Terence Cutcher, two black men who were shot to death by police thi...

Cam Newton Says Some Things To Colin Kaepernick
Simply by virtue of being a famous and talented black quarterback, Cam Newton was always going to get questions about Colin Kaepernick’s refusal to stand for the national anthem. Perhaps sensing that those questions aren’t going away anytime soon, Newton today released a statement of sorts on his In...

That Might Be The Last You See Of Adrian Peterson As A Viking
Adrian Peterson tore a meniscus in his right knee on Sunday night, and announced today he’s going to have surgery tomorrow to repair it. In the absolute best-case scenario, he’ll only be back for the playoffs. Much more likely, he’s out for the season. And after that?...

Marshawn Lynch On Colin Kaepernick Is Very Good
It’s not that recently retired RB Marshawn Lynch doesn’t like talking. He just very much cares about choosing the time and place and topic, and when he does have something to say, it’s quite often worth listening to....

Dodgers Roast Madison Bumgarner En Masse After Shoving Match
Yasiel Puig and Madison Bumgarner got into it last night, prompting a team-wide scuffle and the eventual, inevitable Giants collapse after Bumgarner left the game with one hit through seven innings. Thankfully this happened on the first night of a three-game series, so tonight and tomorrow should be...

Look At How Excited Thomas Davis Is
The Carolina Panthers played with their food (the San Francisco 49ers) for a long time before they finally finished them off this weekend. The defense came up with a touchdown and a pair of picks, but they also allowed Vance McDonald to get loose for a 75-yard touchdown. They’ll be fine, probably, b...

Las Vegas's Play For The Raiders Keeps Getting Shadier
With the public wising up to the con of taxpayer-financed stadiums, the group invested in moving the Oakland Raiders to Las Vegas is doing all it can to remove the public from the process. And Roger Goodell and the NFL are loving it....