nf Page 942 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
LaDainian Tomlinson No Longer 96 Percent Retired, Is Now 100 Percent Retired
Finally, some closure. The San Diego Chargers have announced that the other L.T. will sign a one day contract with the team so that he can retire as a Charger. The move will be made official at a press conference tomorrow. So, maybe he's technically 99.9999999 percent retired....
The Time I Tried To Get Tim Tebow To Sign <i>The Origin Of Species</i>
Earlier this week I went to a New York Jets open practice in Florham Park, NJ. I brought with me a copy of Charles Darwin's The Origin of Species with the plan being that I get Tim Tebow to sign it. It would have been a fun little bit of Gotcha! shmournalism, I suppose. Sadly, I was not successful....
Jury Awards Victims $11 Million in Pacman Jones Case
Welp, it looks like Adam Jones can amend his Scared Straight syllabus. A jury has awarded the victims in that Las Vegas shooting case $11 million in damages. Predictably, the opposing attorneys each have a different take....
Justin Tuck's Crazy New Facemask Is Awesome <em>And</em> Functional
This season New York Giants defensive end Justin Tuck will be taking the field with a particularly striking helmet that looks like something that a mean robot would wear. Although the mask is aesthetically pleasing and will make Tuck look undeniably badass, it actually serves a purpose as well....
Arena Football Player Has Best Excuse Ever For Why His Apartment Caught On Fire
"Kevin Marcus Ellison of the Spokane Shock claims he was told by God to torch his apartment with a marijuana blunt." Happens to the best of us....
Tony Parker's Cornea Becomes The Tragic Collateral Damage Of The Chris Brown-Drake Throwdown
Noted musicians Drake and Chris Brown threw down at WIP, a club in New York, earlier this week. We, as everyone else does, have Drake's back. Everyone had questions: To what extent did Brown taunt Drake about Rihanna-related matters? How did Drake respond? And what, oh what, was Meek Mill's role in ...
The NFL Will Make Its All-22 Film Available To Everyone Next Year, And Football Writing Will Never Be The Same Again
Rejoice, football dorks! The NFL evidently rolled out its Game Rewind 2012 today and announced that there'll be real full-game-length All-22 film in there. This is big....
Charles "Peanut" Tillman Scornfully Responds To Local Teacher's Anti-Bears Math Homework
The Bears' Pro Bowl corner Charles Tillman was promoting his Cornerstone Foundation in a suburban Chicago runner's shop, when he was approached by a teenaged girl. She was the daughter of the store's owner, and she was just killing time doing her math homework, when she came across a problem she tho...
Company Paid To Monitor College Athletes' Twitter And Facebook Accounts Has A Sock-Puppet Business Address IRL
Last month, we met three firms that colleges are using to monitor athletes on Facebook and Twitter. It's ethically and procedurally dubious work, so you might assume the companies would be extra-scrupulous about how they run their own businesses....
Olympics Field Guide: Chris Hoy, The Incredible Hulk Of Track Cycling
Name: Chris Hoy...
Aubrey Huff Hurt Himself Celebrating Matt Cain's Perfect Game
Baseball players: can they stop getting injured in ludicrous ways? No, they can not, and we are thankful for it....
Steelers Receiver Dropped From Anti-Littering Campaign After Pleading Guilty To Littering
Pittsburgh is cracking down on littering, and it's not messing around. According to the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, the city's mayor announced last month that "police will more strictly enforce the city's litter ordinances and fine scofflaws who throw trash on the ground." And, no, no one is above th...
Dave Winfield Appeared In An 80's Ad For Toronto Tourism, Years Before Joining The Blue Jays
Dave Winfield only spent one season with the Blue Jays, but his role in helping Toronto win the 1992 World Series made him a legend in the eyes of Hogtownians. That wasn't always the case, though. After a 1983 incident in which Winfield killed a seagull during warmup tosses—an incident that earned...
A Man Flying A Jetpack Showed Up To The Giants Game Last Night
Oh, Matt Cain threw a perfect game? Sorry, didn't notice. Was too busy having my head explode after seeing a secret agent fly around the Bay on his personal water-powered jetpack. This was the first inning. You knew it was going to be a special game....
Matt Cain Threw MLB's 22nd Perfect Game, And Here's The Final Out As Called On TV, Radio, And <em>En Español</em>
With a dominating 14-strikeout performance, San Francisco Giants pitcher Matt Cain dispatched all 27 Astros hitters he faced tonight at AT&T Park in earning this season's second perfect game, the first in Giants history, and the 22nd in official baseball history. ...
The NFL Asks Pacman Jones To Scare This Year's Rookies Straight
I guess being a 147-time offender in the NFL actually does have its perks. Adam Pac-Man Jones told the Cincinnati media that Commissioner Roger Goodell has called on him to speak to this year's group of incoming rookies on how they can avoid screwing up whatever promising career they hold in front o...
This Eagles/Angry Birds Thing Is Weird
It must have been written into the Eagles' contract with the Angry Birds video game empire that cartoon Andy Reid cannot be fat. Instead the Eagles coach is impossibly muscular at a press conference introducing the newest members of the team: Red Bird, Yellow Bird, and, I don't know, the other bir...
Twins Fan Catches Foul Ball Without Interrupting Cell Phone Conversation
"Right. Uh huh. Yeah. Hey. Yeah. Oh, boy. ... Here it ... I gotta ... Huh. ... OK, right. Oh, I know, totally. [Here you go, hun.] What's that? Oh, nothing. Listen, lemme call you back."...
Olympics Field Guide: Phillips Idowu, The Dennis Rodman Of The Triple Jump
Name: Phillips Idowu...
Bristolmetrics: The Miami Heat Got 120 Minutes Of <i>SportsCenter</i> Coverage Last Week; Every Other Sport Shared 130
When last we met, the Heat got more coverage than the Western Conference, Stephen A. Smith was inexplicably promoting a sci-fi blockbuster, and the NHL was discussed less than the Indy 500. What would this week bring? ...