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The NFL combine isn’t intrusive enough

Welcome to Deadspin’s The Sports Nihilist, where all is for naught and we are but accidental jolts of electrified meat stuck to the surface of a rock in an indifferent universe. Fuck you....

Reimagining the NFL Combine

Just like your local jungle gym, the NFL Combine hasn’t been modernized in decades. They’re still using the same stale gym equipment and drills Al Bundy practiced with at Polk High School to measure the relative strength and athleticism of NFL prospects. It’s past due time for the NFL combine to und...

Did Ryan Leaf just offer the best explanation for Russell Wilson's precipitous decline?

One of the biggest mysteries from the 2022 NFL season was “What the hell happened to Russell Wilson?” This was a conundrum that not even the Scooby Doo gang could solve. Danger-Russ was supposed to help the Denver Broncos compete with the Kansas City Chiefs and Los Angeles Chargers in the AFC West, ...

Will Levis has every chance to be the star of this year’s NFL Combine

Quarterbacks are always under the biggest microscope in football, that’s a given. And there’s not a more unnecessary magnifying glass on signal callers than the NFL Combine. Going through all the scouting drills appears important for about five minutes. How many analysts quoted Tom Brady or Peyton M...

Howie Roseman’s got his hands full attempting to get the Eagles back to the Super Bowl

In this era of NFL parity, it’s rare to see the Super Bowl loser make it back the following year. Since 2000, it’s been rare to see Super Bowl losers make back-to-back appearances in the sport’s biggest game. Philadelphia Eagles general manager Howie Roseman is tasked with putting his team in a posi...

Ja Morant’s recklessness is seeping off the court

One of the observations that persists among people who watch Ja Morant play is, “Oh my god, he’s going to break his hip if he keeps going to the rim like that.” It’s hard for normal people to understand how someone is not only that fast and explosive, but that coordinated. Morant attempts stuff not ...

Raptors apologize for ruining Women's History Month on March 1 [Updated]

Women’s history month is already off to a cringeworthy start in the NBA, with the Toronto Raptors paying tribute (their version of one) to women all over the world. Growing up a huge pro wrestling fan, I’ve seen some bad scripts in my day, but this one takes the cake. Whoever wrote this script needs...

Please let the NFL and its owners be dumb enough not to settle with Brian Flores

Less than a month after Brian Flores’ class-action lawsuit against the league and multiple teams for their alleged racist hiring practices wasn’t mentioned at NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell’s annual press conference at the Super Bowl — where he was pressed again about the lack of diversity in the NF...

Yeah, I’d be worried if I were a Titans fan

With NFL combine workouts slated to start tomorrow with D-linemen and linebackers taking the field, many of this upcoming draft’s top prospects had the opportunity to speak with the media about the opportunity and what they expected moving forward. It wasn’t just prospects though. Many general manag...

Shitting with your thoughts in the dark

This morning I was assigned to evaluate the Aaron Rodgers-Aubrey Marcus podcast about the quarterback, excuse me, person’s self-reflection after the darkness. Over what was a sprawling conversation that wasn’t as interesting as the two thought it was, I am now dumber for having listened to it. Oh, a...

Commanders minority owners are alleging that Dan Snyder used the franchise as a personal 'piggy bank'

The Dan Snyder era has had a dumpster-grade stench from the beginning. But just when it seemed like he’d leave peacefully, his destructive personality kicked back in. Snyder is finally leaning towards selling the team on his own, but not without kicking and screaming. ...

What is the least important NFL Combine drill?

IDIOT OF THE MONTH: A journey through the swamp that was Super Bowl February

Welcome to Deadspin’s IDIOT OF THE MONTH, our world-renowned celebration of stupidity in and around the world of collegiate and professional sports. Now with 50 percent more slideshow to placate the bosses! The Industrial Revolution was a mistake!...

Likely No. 1 NFL Draft pick Jalen Carter charged with reckless driving, racing in deadly crash [Updated]

Projected No. 1 overall NFL Draft selection Jalen Carter’s path to the league just got a lot bumpier. ...

Best landing spots for Jalen Ramsey, should the Rams decide to move him

NFL free agency is about two weeks away, and along with that comes the opportunity for potential trades across the league. Los Angeles Rams cornerback Jalen Ramsey is expected to be a name that could be moving to another team via the trade block. While every team would welcome a six-time Pro Bowl se...

Does Brandon Marshall know something we don't about Aaron Rodgers?

Packers’ QB Aaron Rodgers has reportedly emerged from his darkness retreat, during which time he reflected on his life, his career, and the possibility of making a film about his darkness retreat. Rodgers said he would let the world know about his decision to play or retire in 2023 after emerging fr...

NFL Films cataloged female fan, cheerleader footage with sexualized, offensive descriptions: lawsuit

It’s combine week in the NFL, and to celebrate the league’s views of human flesh, it’s in the news for objectifying women — again. Per a report by the Wall Street Journal, the league and NFL Films allegedly had an archive of fan and cheerleader footage categorized like PornHub kinks — “cheerleaders ...

If you’re in Indianapolis for the combine and see someone who looks like Derek Carr, that’s because it’s him

If there is a general manager currently in Indianapolis in need of a quarterback and someone to share a shrimp cocktail with at St. Elmo’s, Derek Carr is your guy. There will be more than 300 NFL prospects in town for the NFL Scouting Combine, and also one free agent veteran quarterback roaming arou...

The NBA is trying to jam the Elam Ending into a square hole

The Elam Ending has become NBA corporate jargon to throw out there as a salve for everything. All-Star Game lost its appeal? Elam Ending fixes that. Low ratings? ELAM ENDING! Superstars sitting out games? E-LAM END-ING!!! The latest rumored implementation of “Playing to a number” comes as a fix for ...

Here are the most likely suitors for the Chicago Bears' No. 1 overall pick

The NFL belongs to the Chicago Bears for the next two months, regardless of whatever revelation Aaron Rodgers has. They have pocket aces, the Big Joker, Draw Four, whatever your card game of choice is, the Bears have the best hand — the No. 1 overall pick in the NFL Draft. It appears likely that the...