night Page 270 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as, during the earthquake, you shake violently to make the room seem like it's standing still ... • College football: Boise State at Fresno State. Welcome to the Doghouse. [ESPN2] • Golf: Champions Tour, Charles Schwab Cup Championship, second round, Sonoma, Calif. They call us Funkhea...

About Last Night
What you missed while filing a sexual harrassment suit against monkeys ... • MLB: Curt and to the point ... Red Sox beat Rockies, 2-1, to take 2-0 World Series lead. • College football: Doug Flutie Matt Ryan engineers miracle comeback for Boston College. • Tennis: Match fixing in the St. Petersburg ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as the flimsy premise of your latest term paper collapses, killing nine and injuring 30 ... • MLB: World Series, Game 2, Colorado at Boston. The Red Sox have decided to start Beckett in every game. [Fox] • College football: Boston College at Virginia Tech [ESPN]; Air Force at New Mexic...

About Last Night
What you missed while trying to erase your Dumbledore tattoo ... • MLB: Yeah, where's your Messiah now? Red Sox 13, Rockies 1. • NHL: Minnesota's reign of terror has ended. Flames 5, Wild 3. • Tennis: Andy Roddick is upset ... you would be too, if you were beaten by someone named Fabrice....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after some guy with a pocket knife completely ruins the Niceville Mullet Festival for everyone (so typical) ... • MLB: World Series, Game 1, Colorado at Boston. Contrary to popular belief, God couldn't care less. [Fox] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, Olympiakos at Real Madrid. We will...

About Last Night
What you missed while attempting to herd mice ... • NBA: If the Sonics are 1-5 with Durant, what are they going to look like without him? • NHL: Smyth happens ... Avalanche beat Oilers 5-2, you rejoice or despair, as warranted. • Soccer: Walter Samuel's goal gives Inter Milan 2-1 win at CSKA Moscow....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after a day of wok racing ... • NHL: New York Rangers at Pittsburgh. Pengui-mania! [Versus] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, first round, CSKA Moscow at Inter Milan. What they'll all be talking about at the water cooler tomorrow. [ESPN Classic] • College football: Michigan State vs. Oh...

The Colts Haven't Lost Since December, And Still No One Notices
You know, Jacksonville isn't a bad team; you could make a strong argument that they're the fourth best team in the AFC. And Indianapolis is the quiet undefeated defending Super Bowl champion team nobody is talking about. And they hammered the Jags last night....

About Last Night
What you missed while recovering from paintball injuries ... • NFL: Hey, the Colts have a defense too. Indianapolis 29, Jacksonviille 7. • NBA: Knicks' exhibition win over Celtics probably won't be repeated any time soon. New York 94, Boston 87. • Soccer: Whose your daddy? Not Greg Ryan, who is out ...

It's Monday Night In Jacksonville!
You know that "Monday Night Football" means business when the program comes to Jacksonville. You might remember Tony Kornheiser's famous anti-Jacksonville screeds. (They even bothered him in restaurants....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you realize that if you drink beer this way, you're doing it wrong ... • NFL: Indianapolis at Jacksonville. That other unbeaten team isn't making nearly as much noise. [ESPN] • NHL: Boston at Montreal. This rivarly goes back to the French and Indian War. [Versus] • College football:...

About Last Night
What you missed while hiding from assassination hit squad monkey gangs ... • MLB: Red Sox win AL pennant, Manny says "Wait 'till next year." Boston 11, Cleveland 2. • NFL: Jason strikes when you least expect it; he cannot be killed. Broncos 31, Steelers 28. • We don't care what you say; they'll alwa...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you receive a visit from Condom Man... 8 p.m.: MLB: ALCS Game 7, Cleveland Indians at Boston Red Sox. [Fox] 8 p.m.: NCAA Football: Southern Miss at Marshall. We. Are. Disinterested. [ESPN] 8:15 p.m.: NFL: Pittsburgh Steelers at Denver Broncos. Look for Mike Shanahan to call a timeou...

About Last Night...
What you missed while trying to win that lifetime of free beer prize ... • MLB: Oh yeah? More like Lost-o Carmona! Guffaw! • College Football: I'd say that Auburn ought to do more thinking and Les Miles. • Hey look, Boston! Gagne comes through in extras! Oh ... the hockey one....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while coming to grips with a gay Dumbledore... • 8 p.m. — MLB: ALCS, Game 6: Cleveland Indians at Boston Red Sox. Curt Schilling was last seen asking Harvey Firestein for a Josh Beckett mask. [FOX] • 8 p.m. — College football: Michigan at Illinois. Maybe if the Illini weren't always fi...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while dodging falling, flaming squirrels... • MLB: Joe Torre won't be managing the Royals, who hire Trey Hillman. • College Football: UConn, yes you, takes down Louisville, 21-17. • NHL: Coats blank Swords....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you've stepped up the volleyball rivalry a bit ... • College football: Louisville at Connecticut. The cardinal is the most fierce of all the tiny, small-beaked birds. [ESPN] • Golf: Champions Tour, AT&T Championship, first round, San Antonio. This time I shall find a way to beat ...

Who's The Next Person To Get Banned From Monday Night Football
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

About Last Night
What you missed while fumigating your nuts ... • MLB: Despite Manny calling time out when his team didn't have any left, Red Sox stay alive in ALCS. • College football: You've got some red on you ... Rutgers 30, South Florida 27. • Soccer: David Beckham upstaged by the offensive stylings of Jozy Alt...