nl Page 96 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Shohei Ohtani Hit A Game-Winning Homer With A Busted Elbow And Knee
Shohei Ohtani hit the ball far as fuck yesterday, 443 feet to be exact, deep into the ethers of Angel Stadium’s cavernous rock structure in center field. The looping drive was his first homer since May 17, on account of the Grade 2 UCL sprain that kept him out of the lineup from June 4 to July 3. It...
Three Adventure Vloggers Die After Attempted Waterfall Rescue Goes Wrong
Megan Scraper, Ryker Gamble, and Alexey Lyakh were enjoying an afternoon with friends Tuesday at Shannon Falls, near Squamish, British Columbia, when Scraper slipped and fell into the water. Witnesses who spoke to CBC say that Gamble and Lyakh jumped in to try and save her, but all three were swept ...
Hunter S. Thompson Told Jim Irsay To Draft Ryan Leaf Over Peyton Manning
Hunter S. Thompson predicted, in the most general sense, the coming of Donald Trump, or at least the flourishing of the reactionary, retaliatory, mutually-assured-destructive base that put him and his ilk into power. (He also noted, as early as anyone, that the American experiment had peaked and per...
The Fight For Peace Has Never Been Easy
This piece is part of a recurring series that aims to be a complete guide to the laws of war. You can read previous entries here....
Getty Images Apologizes For Getting Horny Over World Cup Fans
The World Cup is a time to feel great pride for your country, to find an excuse to drink before noon, and to appreciate the athletic feats of some of the finest athletes on the planet. If you work at Getty Images, it is also a time to scope out hot babes in the stands and get all horned up....
Report: Hanley Ramirez Is Not Connected To Fentanyl Trafficking Ring; Some Asshole Just Tried To Name-Drop Him<em></em>
After reports on Friday stated that former Red Sox infielder and current free agent Hanley Ramirez was “being eyed in connection with an ongoing federal and state investigation” that involved distribution of the opioid fentanyl, a new report from the Boston Globe says that Ramirez is not being linke...
Report: Cops Looking Into Hanley Ramirez's Possible Connection To Fentanyl Trafficking Ring
ABC investigative journalist Michele McPhee says authorities are looking into Hanley Ramirez’s possible relationship to a large fentanyl distribution case in Massachusetts....
What Are The Laws Of War, And Why Do They Matter?
There are laws in war....
LeBronWatch: Tyronn Lue's Posture Crumbles Upon Hearing The Words "LeBron James"
With the question of LeBron James’s free agency destination settled once and for all—he is for sure headed to the Lakers and the Knicks and the Nuggets this summer—the other hopeful teams around the NBA have got to be feeling like their chances of also landing LeBron are shrinking by the hour. One ...
Spain Shoots Its Own Dick Off In The Name Of Propriety, Fires Manager One Day Before World Cup
The Spanish soccer federation (RFEF) announced today that it has fired its national team manager Julen Lopetegui, on the eve of the World Cup, because Lopetegui did not “act the right way.” The infraction? Lopetegui accepted a job managing Real Madrid, which would have started after the World Cup, w...
Real Madrid's New Manager Julen Lopetegui Thinks Messi Is Better Than Ronaldo
Real Madrid announced Julen Lopetegui as their new manager today, just two weeks after Zinedine Zidane resigned abruptly from the job after winning the Champions League title. Lopetegui is currently manager of Spain’s national team and won’t take over at Real Madrid until after the World Cup....
Possibly Alexander Ovechkin Might Be Having Too Much Fun, Beer
Last time we checked in on Alexander Ovechkin he was compulsively hoisting the Stanley Cup in various spots around Nationals Park after throwing out a pair of ceremonial first pitches. It was an early afternoon game for the Nats, leaving Ovechkin with a whole evening of freedom. So how’d he spend it...
Alex Ovechkin Lets Go Of Stanley Cup Just Long Enough To Botch Ceremonial First Pitch, Drunkenly Sing "We Are The Champions"
Alex Ovechkin brought the Stanley Cup to Nationals Park today, where he threw out the ceremonial first pitch of Saturday’s Giants-Nationals game. Well, okay, the first two pitches—Ovechkin made a funny mess of the first one:...
And Now Let Us Bask In The Radiating Joy Of Euphoric Caps Fans
I am always up for images of sports fans celebrating a championship—the euphoria is contagious, especially when it’s a fan base that hasn’t tasted the glory of a title in a good long while. For a nice appetizer, here’s the celebration on the ice:...
An Emotional T.J. Oshie Describes Winning The Cup In Front Of Father, Suffering Dementia<em></em>
You will get absolutely nowhere if you try to keep the emotion bottled up inside while watching Caps winger T.J. Oshie talk about winning the Stanley Cup with his father in attendance. Oshie’s father is battling Alzheimer’s disease, so big joyous events they can experience together take on added imp...
The 2018 <i>Hockey Night In Canada</i> Season-Ending Montage Is Here<em></em>
Hockey is over for the summer. That sucks! Perhaps, maybe, the only thing that can get us through those lean months will be the annual masterpiece that is the Hockey Night In Canada season-ending montage, set this year to Oasis (??). Here you are....
![Champion Capitals Salute Fans, Especially The One Flashing Them Next To The Glass [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/pjkirbanczgbey2solzx.jpg)
Champion Capitals Salute Fans, Especially The One Flashing Them Next To The Glass [NSFW]
The Washington Capitals leveraged excellent teamwork on their way to claiming the Stanley Cup, and that teamwork continued as they took a lap around the arena in Las Vegas tonight, finding one, uh, nakedly enthusiastic fan showing her appreciation for the team in a not-safe-for-work way....
D.C.'s Chinatown Is Sinking Under A Sea Of Red
It has been a long, long while since the last time D.C. had any reason to throw a public sports watch party. With the Caps on a run through the Stanley Cup playoffs, and the weather around town holding up beautifully, Caps watch parties, taking place inside and around the Caps’ Chinatown arena, hav...
The Capitals Finally Made Vegas Look Like An Expansion Team<em></em>
In the follow-up performance to a Game 3 loss marked by defensive miscommunications and mishaps, the Vegas Golden Knights looked even worse for most of Game 4, falling to the Capitals 6-2 to go down 3-1 in the Stanley Cup Finals. On the whole, Vegas actually did a better job of creating dangerous ch...
Maybe It Actually Is Okay For Caps Fans To Believe?
The Caps were still up by a goal after Braden Holtby’s incredible blunder in the third period of Saturday’s Game 3, but when it happened—the very instant Tomáš Nosek guided Holtby’s blind, panicked, incomprehensibly ill-advised give-away into the empty net—a vision of the next great gut-wrenching Ca...