no Page 1007 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Lakers Are Really Going For it
The Lakers have cleared the decks. They’ve stripped away every player from the roster who they do not view as central to their next championship push. It turns out the list of remaining players is hilariously small and remarkably expensive, and before filling out the margins the Lakers very much ho...
The Mets Bullpen Completes A Remarkable Phillies Sweep Of The Mets
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: The New York Mets lost in deeply dispiriting fashion Thursday, to finish off a gruesome series and drop eight games below .500. Things are getting pretty grim over there....
Rugby Man Slaps Dislocated Knee Back Into Place, Immediately Hops Into Scrum
Rugby can be best described as British hockey because for as entertaining as it can be to watch, the fans can often ruin the experience with their innate desire to prove just how much tougher the players are in their sport compared to those in others. It certainly doesn’t help that rugby players ar...
Deadspin Up All Night: Sailing Off On The Ships To Nowhere
Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Go Chubs. ...
Lucy Bronze's Stunning Goal Completes England's Demolition Of Norway
England had themselves a chill afternoon in the quarterfinals against Norway, scoring twice in the first half and once a little later on to beat the Norwegians 3-0 and advance to the semifinals, where they’ll face the winners of Friday’s game between the USWNT and France. But before they worry about...
WWE Picks Two Relics Of The '90s To Fix Its Creative Stagnation
On Thursday, Sports Illustrated broke an “exclusive” story about a shift in WWE’s upper management. Effective immediately, the storied wrestling figures Paul Heyman and Eric Bischoff will take on the roles of Executive Directors for Raw and SmackDown Live, respectively. Though the report notably doe...
Barcelona And Valencia's Goalkeeper Swap Looks Shady As Hell
Yesterday, Barcelona announced that they had sold goalkeeper Jasper Cillessen to Valencia, for a fee of €35 million. Today, Valencia announced that they had sold goalkeeper Neto to Barcelona, for a fee of €26 million with €9 million in add-ons. In doing so, Barcelona and Valencia traded goalkeepers,...
An Interview With The Man Who Enraged A Minor League Baseball Team By Suggesting They Call Themselves The Humpback Chubs
Today, for reasons that were at first very hard to parse, the Grand Junction Rockies, a minor-league team affiliated with the Colorado Rockies, sent out the following aggressive, since-deleted tweets:...
Ancient War Goblin Henry Kissinger Defends Olympics In <i>Los Angeles Times</i>
Every global-scale sporting event exists in a strange standoff with itself. On one side is the inevitable bloat and graft and soul-deep cynicism that animates every such event—the neighborhoods flattened or surveilled or otherwise punished for sitting where a stadium is supposed to be, the bribery a...
A Scout's Honor
You don’t get to choose which parts of your past are remembered. ...
Family Of Murdered Utah Track Athlete Lauren McCluskey Sues School Over "Deliberate Indifference" Before Her Death
The parents of Lauren McCluskey filed a federal lawsuit against the University of Utah and several administrators on Thursday over the school’s alleged failure to take their daughter’s calls for help seriously before she was murdered, as well as their subsequent investigation of McCluskey’s death th...
What A Foul Ball Can Do
Laura Cusick and her husband Richard loved baseball. They loved it so much for so long that it became a part of their marriage. When they had kids, they taught them to love the game, too: to root for the home team (the Braves), and learn the players names, and to stretch in the seventh inning. They ...
Dominant Dodgers Reliever Russell Martin Threw His First Career Strikeout
Some MLB managers might believe that, when the team is down 8-2 and the bullpen is drained, it’s time to give up and send out a position player to pitch. Not Dave Roberts, though. When he and his Dodgers found themselves in that exact situation at the tail end of their series against the Diamondback...
The Madman Theory Of The Montreal/Tampa Bay Rays
Any self-respecting student of insane Machiavellian gambits should be familiar with the Madman Theory, Richard Nixon’s self-invented strategy for winning the war in Vietnam. The theory, as recounted by Nixon chief of staff H.R. Haldeman after he got out of jail for his role in Watergate, went like t...
Jason Vargas Implies That We Do Not Know The Full Story Behind The Mets' Latest Metsing
Mets pitcher Jason Vargas had one of his best starts of the season last night, holding the Phillies to just three hits and two earned runs through 6.1 innings while striking out 10. The Mets still lost the game, of course, but Vargas’s strong start apparently left him feeling a bit sassy. In the loc...
Behold The Destructive Force Of An F5 Poop Tornado
Last Thursday, a “sewer blockage” in the town of Melrose, Massachusetts, had city workers scrambling to restore flow across the town’s entire system. The blockage was eventually cleared, but not before it created what one affected resident described as a “tornado of poop” in her bathroom, after raw ...
Vanderbilt Terminates Michigan's Cinderella Run, Wins College World Series
They didn’t have the luxury of superstar pitcher Kumar Rocker on the mound tonight, but Vanderbilt didn’t need him for even a moment in their winner-take-all game against Michigan on Wednesday night. With a dull but decisive 8-2 victory, the Commodores completed a comeback from a 1-0 series deficit,...
Old Man Wayne Rooney Scores A Goal From A Million Billion Miles Away
Wayne Rooney has done some cool stuff with D.C. United, in Major League Soccer. He did a lovely free kick goal. He virtually single-handedly dragged the United to the MLS playoffs. An insane two-way highlight from last August was rightly hailed as maybe the best MLS highlight ever. I hereby submit ...
Moron President Gives Defense Department Four Months To Craft Service Academy Athletics Policy He Himself Axed
Having previously bragged about his intention to look into such a thing, our sleazy doofus of a president has taken the first formal step toward instituting a policy that would allow service academy athletes to defer their military service obligations in order to pursue careers in professional spor...