no Page 4933 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cockblocked by Barry Zito. GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Great Moments In Comic Sans History
In light of Dan Gilbert's laudable, laughable open letter to LeBron James, we proudly present an alternate history, in which Comic Sans is the font of choice (complete with needless scare quotes)....
Da' Rick Rogers, Prized Vol Recruit, Lover Of Ladies Who Bite, Arrested For Brawl
Not with this enthusiastic young lass in the photo, though. No, Rogers was arrested last night at a campus bar after a donnybrook broke out. Rogers originally committed to UGA, but defected and signed with rival UT....
Chad Ochocinco Is Looking For A Classy Broad
On his reality dating show: "I don't have nobody to cook for me. I don't have nobody to go to McDonald's with, or to take to the high-end restaurants like Red Lobster." [Dan Patrick Show]...
Yes, Dennis Green's Son, Who Apparently Writes For ESPN, Had Some Kiddie Porn On His Computer
I almost typed "kitty porn," which I assume is a lesser charge in Connecticut. Green was also charged with possession of narcotics and drug paraphernalia. He was gonna have quite a party by himself. [Hartford Courant]...
LeBron Watch, Day 50: What ESPN Should Have Asked LeBron James
On a night when LeBron James became the most hated man in basketball, only one network had a chance to ask him tough questions about a decision that will shape the future the NBA. And, of course, they didn't do that....
Surveying The Wreckage Of The Matt Millen Era
Today, the Lions released Daniel Bullocks, the last player remaining from a 5-year stretch of drafts. That's 0-for-40. Here's what became of them all, and I warn you, it's not pretty....
Art Modell Hated Worse In Cleveland Than LeBron, Says Art Modell
Modell thinks those pansies will get over LeBron, unlike those still bitching and moaning about the original Browns. "I wish the team that gets him well. And as long as I do well, I'm fine." [News-Herald]...
Tennessee Players In Bar Brawl, But Is There A Potential NCAA Violation In Play?
If you're a UT player and would like to stay on the team, just avoid Cumberland Avenue. And if you're a regular person and don't want to get beaten up by the UT players, also avoid Cumberland Avenue....
Potential Vandals Beware: There Are Witnesses
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
LeBron's Departure Helps Tea Party, Political Writers In Desperate Need Of LeBron Angle
It's early, but this story on The Atlantic's web site might just be the most inane, half-assed piece of LeBron punditry you'll read today. Here, I'll summarize: LeBron made Ohio angry. Angry people join the Tea Party. The end....
Cavs Owner Channels Crazy Person: "Some People Think They Should Go To Heaven But NOT Have To Die To Get There"
Owner Dan Gilbert has written an open letter to Cavs fans in the sort of prose you normally find wrapped around a brick. Note the font: The guy makes Comic Sans seem sinister....
Fan-Burning-LeBron-Jersey Videos Are The New Fan-Screaming-In-Front-Of-TV Videos
Cleveland is having its very own Guy Fawkes Day right now. If you see any more of these out there, do let us know. [via @TreyKerby]...
IT'S FUCKING OVER: LEBRON TO HEAT SAYS... LEBRON
LeBron James made a decision. Here's video....
THIS SEALS IT: CLEVELAND NOT IN PICTURE SAYS..RANDOM ILLITERATE VANDALISM
Still no official ESPN "DECISION"...yet. (And they were right.)...
The Decision: The Open Thread
The wait is almost over. Use this as your open thread for all LeBronukkah festivities. If you're feeling especially morbid, watch the happenings unfold with the sad sack patrons of a bar in Cleveland. Prediction: The Blazers pull off a coup....
Jousting Is The Next Big Sport, Says Newspaper Known For Inventing Trends
The New York Times has a big ol' magazine piece on the popularity of full-contact jousting. You'd think it'd be hipsters doing it ironically, but no, they're manly men. Action footage after the jump....
FIST-EXPLOSION: LEBRON STAYING IN CLEVELAND, SAYS..."CUBES"
"Which is exactly why I think he is going back to the Cavs. The sports world is full of uncertainties. When in doubt, go for the love." [BlogMaverick, artwork via 9GAG]...
BREAKING: GREENWICH ABSOLUTELY SWARMING WITH PEOPLE JUST SORT OF MILLING AROUND
Our man in Connecticut, Craig Fehrman, took this photo a couple hours ago across the street from the Greenwich Boys and Girls Club. Craig reports: "The only fans there were that kid and a parental-looking figure [in the Cavs jersey], who was spelling his last name like a pro."...
ESPN Deploys LeBron Sad Trombone/Victory Reporting Team Just In Case Chris Broussard Is Completely Wrong
Many sources scampering around Bristol have relayed that, for all that careful hedging. ESPN's own Chris Broussard claims he's "99% positive" LeBron will sign with the Miami WadeBosh. And if he's wrong? Well, ESPN has boots on the ground....