not Page 31 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Weather Forces Evacuation Of Notre Dame Stadium
When the Notre Dame Fighting Irish retreated to the locker room at halftime, they were down 16-0 to Lou Holtz's kid's team. While Coach Brian Kelly was discussing their "performance" in the first half against South Florida, the stadium seating areas were evacuated on account of foul weather....

Your College Football Afternoon Games Open Thread
Skip Holtz will try to beat the team Daddy Lou used to coach! How awesome is that?! So awesome that it's a network game! Oh, pretty much every Notre Dame game is on NBC, you say? Of course it is. Because that's how it was foretold....

Washington Man, Stung By Bee, Decides To Pour Gasoline All Over The Beehive And Blow It Up
Those damned bees. They sting you, and perhaps you get particularly swollen, and somewhat irritated, and then your summer day is ruined and you've got a moderate-sized welt on your arm....

This Week In Non-Hurricane Unintentional-Dong Picture Submissions
Just because one part of the country is getting rainy and windy and floody and scaredy and buy-y milky and bready becausey of hypey — translation: chock full of hurricane dong — the other unintentional-dong submissions should not lose their inherent import....

Let's Watch Cesc Fabregas Score His First Highlight-Reel Goal For Barcelona
Your morning roundup for Aug. 27, the day Chevy Chase's resurgence finally got to Dan Aykroyd, but not necessarily to Bill Murray, because Bill Murray knows he's better than Ghostbusters 3. This, because he unequivocally is. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Charles Mann Will Have You Know That He's Totally Straight
On the sidelines with a mic for last night's Washington/Indianapolis game, former Redskin Charles Mann complimented the heck out of safety LaRon Landry as O.J. Atogwe took it all in. Talking about how he looked fantastic. But wait, wait, not like that. He's happily married. To a woman. Totally str...

SWAT Team Called To Home Of Former Patriots And Notre Dame Defensive Coach
"A SWAT team has responded to the Northbrook Shores subdivision in Granger after shots were reportedly fired inside at a home in the 10000 block of Glynwater Ct. This was originally called in as a domestic dispute just before 1 p.m. A neighbor told WSBT the home is owned by Corwin Brown, a former N...

Ray Guy's Three Super Bowl Rings Ended Up Being Worth $96,216
Old Raiders punter Ray Guy went bankrupt. So, a judge told Ray Guy to sell off the hand jewels he received for participating in Super Bowl victories over the Vikings, Eagles and Redskins. No word on who made off with the rings via Nate D. Sanders Auctions — "Sorry, I can't disclose the winning bidd...

Tim Tebow's Backwards Baseball Cap Is Serious Business
Broncos fans, you are amazing. Amazing....

BREAKING: Hall Of Famer, Admitted T-Shirt Thief Roberto Alomar Will Return The T-Shirt He Stole
Perhaps you read our story earlier today, of Blue Jays fans Fiyaz Kanji and Owais Farooqui, who made the pilgrimage to Cooperstown this weekend to see Roberto Alomar enter the Hall. But during the parade, Alomar took the $50 t-shirt that belonged to Kanji....

They're Making A Full-Body Wax Casting Of Bernard Hopkins For Display In An "Odditorium"
Hot off the presses from Bernard Hopkins's press folks and the good people from Ripley's Believe It Or Not is word that the boxer has committed to a two-day appearance in the F/X department at Ripley's world headquarters in Orlando. There, on Monday and Tuesday, he will "begin the tedious task of h...

Guys Who Find Casey Anthony Attractive Gross Linda Cohn Out
In the time since the Casey Anthony verdict was announced, Michelle Beadle had SportsCenter's Linda Cohn on her Sportsnation podcast. Sports. Sports. Sports. Cohn needed to get something about an unidentified New York sportstalk-radio show THAT WASN'T ESPN off her chest:...

Top-Heavy Venezuelan Quasi-Celeb Promises To Pose Nude If Her Team Wins Copa America
Ms. Diosa Canales, the lady you see on the horse above, has decided to rep the Venezuelan national team (La Vinotinto, as we native Venezuelans call it) by agreeing to finally get naked if they win the Copa America. She's got a Twitter account and everything....

Ben Roethlisberger Really Isn't On Twitter After All
Whoever is running the Twitter account for Ben Roethlisberger's website has hereby declared that "This is NOT his personal account." However, that didn't stop website namesake's teammate Hines Ward from wishing a "Happy Father's Day to all" on it....

Lady Politician Kicked Out For Rocking A Jersey
Clare Curran, a member of the New Zealand Parliament representing Dunedin South, was asked to leave the debating chambers yesterday after arriving in a Highlanders jersey to show her support for the rugby club's original colors. The Highlanders have announced plans to adopt a green jersey, which h...

Your Heat/Mavericks Game Two Open Thread
The Miami Heat try to retain home-court advantage with a win over the Dallas Mavericks tonight. Nowitzki'll wear a middle-finger splint, so unless he has experience excelling with his middle finger all doctored up, they probably will. Or won't. Most Americans don't seem to care....

Your Bulls/Heat Game Five Open Thread
If there's an element of Chicago Bulls fandom that thinks tonight could be the season's end, Mare Bear is not among them. And who knows, maybe she's right. Because if the LeBrons have shown the world one thing this offseason, it's that they're a .500 team on the road....

Your Thunder/Mavericks Game Five Open Thread
It's quite simple: The Oklahoma City Thunder have to win in Dallas tonight, then at home on Friday night and then again in Dallas on Sunday night or the Oklahoma City Thunder's season is over. Whenever it happens, maybe that's when somebody can explain who at The Oklahoman newspaper decided to run ...

Oscar De La Hoya Is Not Having A Fun Time In Rehab
Oscar looks bloated and sad, as this valiant paparazzo hounds him. What happened to the Golden Boy?...
