ns Page 2087 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

PEYTON MANNING IS IN MIAMI BUT ALSO DENVER IS INTERESTED
Holy shit look at this blurry CBS Miami coptercam shot that's totally Peyton Manning who flew directly to South Florida after his Indy press conference and sure he owns a home there but also the Dolphins play there and the Dolphins might sign Peyton Manning but wait what's this Adam Schefter says th...

Excerpts From The Long-Lost Script For <em>Monday Night Football: The Cartoon</em>
So total at the time was Cosell's saturation of culture that Irwin Weiner, an ABC Sports vice president for twenty years, once came up with a concept for a Saturday morning kids' series called "Monday Night Football: The Cartoon", one that would turn Cosell, Gifford and Meredith into animated charac...

The U.S. Women's Open Of Bowling Will Be Held Outdoors, In The Least Magical Place On Earth
What you're looking at is an artist's conception of the U.S. Women's Open, which will follow in the footsteps of the NHL's Winter Classic and the NCAA's aircraft carrier game by being held outside, under the desert sun, in downtown Reno, Nevada. I can't think of a better gift for your worst enemy....

Hines Ward Signs With Ravens, Reports Pittsburgh TV Station That Fell For Obvious Parody
It’s not clear how this exclusive BroCouncil “report” could have fooled anyone, let alone that intrepid crew of news readers at WPXI-TV, who lamented Ward’s departure for the Steelers’ biggest rival at the top of their 6 a.m. newscast this morning....

Marlins President Calls Miamians Stupid, Jose Reyes Greedy
If you know anything about the sweetheart deal the city gave the Marlins to build a new stadium, you know team president David Samson basically bent Miami over a pinball machine and had his way with it. But he's far from done with the humiliation—with his remarks to a gathering of local business lea...

Dave Duerson Had Less Than $20,000 In Assets When He Committed Suicide
Dave Duerson was a millionaire and a successful CEO after the conclusion of his 11-year NFL career. But when he shot himself in the heart last year, leaving behind a note that asked his family to donate his brain for dementia testing, Duerson was going through bankruptcy proceedings. He owed hundred...

Dancing Canucks Kid Is Sexy And He Knows It
Even less concerned with the judgment of strangers? The guy behind him, drinking his Mike's Hard Lemonade. [via Hot Clicks]...

Ronald McDonald Loved Seeing Bryce Drew, But The Ole Miss Fan Sitting Next To Him Just Grimaced The Whole Game
I don't have the context for this, and I don't want it. Clowns get damn good seats for being as scary as they are, and if you don't know why Ole Miss still hates Bryce Drew, take a trip down memory lane back to 1998....

The "Scam Cup": How A Very American TV Event Gives U.S. Gymnasts A Leg Up On The Olympic Competition
If you listen to USA Gymnastics and NBC, it's one of the most important Olympic tune-ups. If you listen to the rest of the world, it's a glorified showcase for American athletes. So maybe it's fitting that the American Cup's highest-scoring female gymnast wasn't even entered in the competition. ...

Detroit Is Going Dancing
Congratulations to the Detroit Titans, who in beating Valparaiso 68-50 won the Horizon League tournament and punched their ticket to the dance. [ESPN]...

Peyton Manning May Sign With The Jets Or Dolphins Or 49ers Or Not
The news is barely a few hours old that the Indianapolis Colts will not pay quarterback Peyton Manning his $28 million roster bonus, thus freeing him to sign with any NFL team next season. You know who's interested in snagging the four-time MVP? Everyone! Well, mostly. A select few would be thrilled...

How Drunk Football Fans Used To Get Their World Series Fix
Yeah, we're a pretty spoiled bunch these days. Smartphones and tablet computers allow us to catch real-time video wherever we are. It wasn't so easy back in 1986. If life, the universe, and everything decided that two of your favorite teams just had to play on the same night, you had some big deci...

42 "Pussy" Shots For £126! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Epic £203,948.80 Bar Tab From A Liverpool Nightclub
Where to begin with this epic bar tab (full version at the bottom)? It's so single-minded, so devoid of nuance. I hate it. When Petchesky first directed my attention to this abomination, which was posted a few places yesterday, I thought it could only belong to one man—Don Johnson, the "champagne ki...

Sean Payton And Mickey Loomis Apologize To Saints Owner, No One Else
Here's the official statement, hot off the presses:...

Davey Johnson Has Nicknamed Drew Storen "Tinkerbell"
Johnson, the Nationals' manager, picked the name because Storen, the team's closer, has a tendency to tweak his delivery. All well and good. And plenty of swell options for entry music....

Gregg Easterbrook Has Dubbed The Bounty Scandal "Sinnersgate," Because He's A Haughty Dipshit
Now that Terra Nova has been canceled, noted Brookings Institutionarian and surveyor of the cosmos Gregg Easterbrook was finally free today to chime in on the NFL bounty scandal. And oh, dear readers. Oh, the man never fails to disappoint. Right off the bat, this is what you get ......

The Scandal Is What The Media's NCAA Scandal Cops Think Is A Scandal
We've been around the block with Yahoo's scandal hunters a time or two, but this latest scoop is really reductioing their worst absurdum into the ground:...

ESPN's Keith Law Is A Fan Of Bad Spring Training Twitpics, Unless It Involves One Of His Bad Spring Training Twitpics
We told you two weeks ago about the hilarity that is Bad Spring Training Twitpics, the site that's collecting all the bad art being snapped by the cameraphones of the many baseball writers now roaming around spring training. That same day, Keith Law let his many Twitter followers know he was also a ...

World's Biggest Cricket Benefactor Found Guilty Of $7 Billion Ponzi Scheme
Allen Stanford, the Texas "financier" who once lavished millions of dollars on cricketers around the world, was convicted today of allegedly swindling investors out of more than $7 billion:...

The Saints' Offseason Has Turned Into The Sort Of Offseason Where Randy Moss Works Out For Them
Moss caught some passes for the Saints, and a league source said it "couldn't have gone better." Well, it could have if Moss wasn't 35. And if he wasn't being thrown to by Brian Brohm, who's also under consideration in New Orleans. And if Drew Brees wasn't reportedly "livid" about being slapped with...