ns Page 2179 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Who Would Like To See The Original Becky From <em>Roseanne</em>'s Interpretation Of Rex Ryan's Foot Vid?
She's the one in the cleats. [Via HHR]...

Here's A Reds Fan Sucking On Some Rando's Toes, Just Because
What's going on here? Do you know what's going on here? I don't know what's going on here, and neither does the person who took the picture. It's just some visiting Reds fan, going to town on some guy's toes. [Cards Diaspora]...

The Walk-Off Balk Is The Least Exciting Non-Play In Baseball
Your morning roundup for July 5, the day a monkey stole our camera....

Kobayashi Somehow Sets A New, Totally Unofficial Hot Dog Eating Record
With the Empire State Building as a backdrop and a drag queen named Mimi Imfurst cracking jokes about stuffing wieners into Anderson Cooper's mouth, Takeru Kobayashi executed an improbably perfect "up yours" to the Nathan's hot dog eating contest, from which he's been barred over a long-running cont...

On My Honeymoon, I Kept Seeing A Flabby, Neck-Braced Kaka
You probably know Kaka as the superstar midfielder for Brazil and Real Madrid. Maybe you'll remember him as the cover boy of FIFA 11....

More Fun With License Plates: Sketchy "Do Me" Van Is Often Parked Near "NWA" Honda CR-V
Hickey alerted you Saturday to the "Do Me" white van, a New Jersey-based vehicle that undoubtedly has stained shag carpeting....

The Iron Sheik Thinks There's Something You Should Know About Hulk Hogan
Some grudges die hard. Happy Independence Day, from the Sheik....

The Lonesome Independence Day Of Kobayashi, Eater In Exile
On a May evening, in a cramped biergarten behind a German restaurant off the Bowery in Manhattan, Takeru Kobayashi sat down to a plate of Rheinischer Sauerbraten mit Kartoffelklößen und Rotkraut. First, he produced a small camera and began photographing the sauerbraten for his blog, where he catalog...

Let's Check In With Mork "Hunting Bait" Encino
Now that word is out that $12,000 will allegedly afford you the right to spend 24 hours hunting a naked Mork Encino, he's none too worried about the fact that somebody claims to have GPS-located where the pictures on his website HuntMe4Sport.com were taken. Here's what had to say via email yesterda...

Novak Djokovic Won Wimbledon, But Pet Poodle Pierre Wasn't There To See It
When Novak Djokovic wakes up tomorrow, he'll be the No. 1 ranked tennis player in the world and the 2011 Wimbledon champion, having defeated tomorrow's No. 2 ranked player Rafael Nadal 6-4, 6-1, 1-6, 6-3....

Here's Video Of The Elusive Great Adventure Baboon Getting Caged And Returned To Captivity
A guy named Peter Kong is narrating this New York Post video about the end of the Great Adventure baboon's three-day reign of terror across New Jersey. He's been waiting for this day his whole damn life. Deliver the goods, Kong! (Raw, Kong-less video here can be found here.)...

Watch A Blue Jays Reliever And Manager Get Ejected On The Day Roy Halladay Returned To Toronto's Mound
Your morning roundup for July 3, the day after some baby gators proved a mud hole is better than any stop, drop and roll mantra....

THE ELUSIVE GREAT ADVENTURE BABOON HAS BEEN CAPTURED! NEW JERSEY IS SAFE!
The Star-Ledger and others are reporting that a runaway baboon from the Six Flags amusement-park safari in Jackson, NJ was tranquilized and taken into custody around 2:40 p.m. after three days on the lam....

Here's Video Of Heather O'Reilly's Fantastic World Cup Goal
The United States Women's National Team is up 1-0 on Colombia at the half. Heather O'Reilly, upper 90 with pace, is why. [Soccernet]...

Deion Sanders, Jr. Shaken Down For Attempted Chick-Fil-A Purchase
Deion Sanders Jr. is a highly touted quarterback prospect at Marcus High in Flower Mound, Texas, about an hour from Dallas. Having the name Deion Sanders may help him in this realm....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Schmuck Owners
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Frank McCourt, the lockouts, and James Dolan's never-ending flirtation with Isiah Thomas, here are five of the best stories ever written about terrible owners....

Former First Round Pick Now Growing Marijuana, Hoarding Assault Rifle Ammo
We can not, repeat NOT blame the lockout for this one. Jose Ortiz, known as Piculín and revered as a hero in Puerto Rico, was busted this week at his home. Inside ICE agents found "approximately 218 marijuana plants" and 40 rounds of AR-15 ammunition. The criminal complaint, with photos, can be foun...

Jagr To Pittsburgh: Nope
Officially, the record will say the Penguins withdrew their 1-year, $2 million offer to Jaromir Jagr. But it's fairly safe to say that Jagr, who's had the deal in front of him for a few days, made it clear he wanted more. More money? More years? More of a chance at a Cup?...

Largest Sports Site Posts Messi Satire, Second-Largest Sports Site Parrots It As News
On Tuesday, Yahoo's soccer blog posted a seemingly innocuous article on Lionel Messi's loyalty to Barca. "When I eventually pass on, I will only play ghost football at Barcelona. I am happy there. No amount of spirit money will tempt me," he supposedly said....
