ns Page 2429 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Koby Clemens Proves His Worthiness As Rightful Heir To Dushbag Throne
Koby Clemens, the squatty-looking 21-year-old catcher and son of Roger Clemens found himself in a little bit of legal trouble over the weekend when he and two of his minor league teammates were arrested after a disturbance outside of Mac and Bob's ("Best Salem area Restaurant 2004" ) early Sunday mo...
Lou Holtz Now Dabbleth In Thaturday Thychiatry
Signal To Noise, who deserves the game ball for yesterday's incarnation of the Hugh Johnson Project, was the first to show us the latest gimmick for ESPN analyst Lou Holtz to dispense his folksy flavor of football knowledge to TV audiences each Saturday. We covered this in Spud's Blogdome, but it re...
Ricky Williams Gets High...er Salary, 1-Year Extension
The love affair between Miami RB Ricky Williams and Dolphins management is in full bloom, as the NFL's house practitioner of holistic medicine received an extension through the 2009 season, and reportedly a pay raise to boot. Terms of the raise were not disclosed, but my guess is that it involves la...
Report: Canseco To Appear On FOX's 'Moment Of Truth'
Former big league slugger and chronic attention whore Jose Canseco will be appearing on the FOX reality show/game show/exhibit of the degradation of society, "The Moment Of Truth." Canseco, the pariah whose autobiography catalyzed the Mitchell Report, congressional hearings and a new PED policing ef...
Tom Brady to Miss a Month?
Make of this what you will, but there is a yet-to-be-confirmed rumour floating out there that Tom Brady's foot injury may be worse than he's been letting on. Like, "out for four games" worse. From NFL Juice: ...
Woody Sez: Put That Judge In The Hall of Fame!
Woody Paige and Jay Crawford fans can breath a sigh of relief: sexual harassment charges against the two have been thrown out of a Manhattan court. The charges were filed by Rita Ragone, self-professed "Stylist to the Stars", who alleged the two men groped and propositioned her while the three were ...
HUGH 3: Revenge Of The Sith (Part 3)
Thanks to everyone who contributed to the Project tonight. We salute our unlikely winner Northwestern, who, in all honesty, scores an upset whenever they win a game. Good job, them. As for the rest of our winners, congratulations. Your hopes of national prominence continue to live! As an aside, our ...
Rudi Johnson Released From Bengals, Presumably For Good Behavior
You KNOW you're washed up when even the Bengals don't want you around anymore. Such is the case with Rudi Johnson, the tough Bengals running back whom you could pencil in for 1,300 yards and 12 touchdowns each season. At least that was the case before the franchise ran him into the ground. Last seas...
HUGH 3: Back In Training (Part 2)
We've enjoyed two big upsets today, and with the Clemson-Alabama game yet to come (and to be live blogged right here!), we can count on yet another Top 25 team eating the dirt before day's end. Most of you have weighed in on Virginia Tech, but there's still more football to be discussed. Get us your...
HUGH 3: Return Of The King (Part 1)
Just a little tip when you're submitting your bits of brilliance to The Hugh Johnson on AOL Instant Messenger: Phallic references will almost always get you to the front of the line. Rips on Andre Ware and Pam Ward are always welcomed. Hey, whatever you're selling, we're buying. But now it's time to...
Whatever Happened to a Good Old Fashioned Headbutt?
Score one for the extraordinarily thin-skinned. A judge in Naples, Italy recently awarded 1500 Euro to a fan of the Napoli Football Club for "existential damages" he incurred while attending a match against Inter Milan. The cause of the damages? Banners. But not just any banners. Banners that made l...
Aye Carumba! Chad Johnson Changes Last Name To Ocho Cinco
So Bengals wideout Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Which I guess is only slightly better than "Chad Javon GoldenPalace.com." Chad expects to play in the Bengals' season opener, despite suffering a dislocated shoulder in the preseason and creating more needlework...
You know she has that Scooby-Doo tongue.
You see I don't, I don't work with any exact boundaries of the law because I wasn't consulted when the god damn laws were made. No, instead nameless, faceless politicians, the so called protectors of the moral majority decide what is right and what is wrong. I mean come on. I govern my life around m...
U.S. Open Update: Ivanovic Out, But Hot Girlfriend Boxes Intact
Dylan Stableford writes occasionally about tennis for Deadspin. It's called "Droppin' Deuce With Dylan Stableford." This week, he's at the U.S. Open, watching tennis and taking creepy pictures of Brooklyn Decker from afar. Heading into the first weekend of the Flushing fortnight, we've lost one sult...
NFL Season Preview: Tennessee Titans
We're less than two weeks away from the start of the NFL season, so it's time to start the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Today: The Tennessee T...
LenDale White Thinks Ohio State Sucks
Fortunately for White, unlike former USC teammate Carson Palmer—who told an LA radio station he hated Ohio State and their fans and then was forced to issue an apology— he plays in Tennessee. Which means he could probably run for Governor and be elected on the "Ohio State Sucks" platform. So don't ...
Roger Ebert Gives Jay Mariotti A Strategically Placed Thumb On His Way Out The Door
If there are any more questions about Jay Mariotti's awfulness and how actively despised he is by most people at the Chicago Sun-Times, look no further than this internal letter being circulated around, oh, everywhere in Chicago's news rooms penned by Sun-Times movie critic Roger Ebert. The man sure...
Pacman Jones Just Got Reinstated; Receives News at Hooters
Dallas area strippers are rejoicing. It's probably just a coincidence that thunderstorms are in the Dallas forecast. Because, after over a year of suspension, Pacman is back. Jones confirmed the reinstatement with the Dallas Morning News this afternoon. Where was he when he received the news? Hoote...
College Football Previews: #1 Georgia
At long last, we've reached the start of college football season and the end of our sojourn through the top 25. Thanks a ton to all our 25 writers for helping us get ready for the new season. Our final preview is brought to you by Doug Gillett of Hey Jenny Slater. Do enjoy. By the way, the above pi...