ns Page 2542 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Tank Johnson Will Be Allowed To Violate O-Linemen's Probation
Well, the wheels of justice grind gloriously in the land of Chicago. Defensive lineman Tank Johnson — whose name is not Feelings Johnson for a reason — will be able to play in the Super Bowl. A Cook County judge just ruled less than an hour ago that Tank will be able to travel with the team to Miami...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Baseball with Rob Neyer: Hi, it's your wife, remember me? You'll find your belongings on the lawn tonight for easier access. • 1 p.m.. NFL with Scouts' Rodd Newhouse: So, is Tank Johnson free to attend my Chicago-area Super Bowl ...

"I Hope You Watch It Over And Over, Like I Will"
The instinct, of course, is to make fun of this kid, who's rocking the Jewfro and slow-motioning his own dunks in his basement basketball "court." But we've all been him, setting the microwave timer to hit last-second shots and trying to do Dominique dunks with a ping-pong ball....

See? Michael Vick Has Never Smoked Pot, Ever!
At last, the pristine and sacred names of Michael Vick and Ron Mexico can be cleared, no longer to be sullied with such filthy innuendo: It turns out that everybody's favorite HSV Type 2 carrier didn't have marijuana with him on a planet last week after all....

NBA Roundup: More Fun In The Grand Canyon State
Notes on Sunday's games in the National Basketball Association ......

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Live from the Senior Bowl!: The exclamation point stands for fun! (Kill us). • 1 p.m. MLB with Gary Gillette: Are you prepared to say the words "Chase Utley, highest-paid athlete in all the universe?" • 4 p.m. Giants' DE Osi Umen...

NFC Blogdome: Super Bowl Shuffle, V. 2.0
Dispatches from blogdome's front lines following the NFC Championship game ......

Rex Grossman, Like Jim McMahon, But Without The Sunglasses And Headband
We don't mean to imply that Bears fans can get a little crazy in their devotion to their team — they can, but they're usually not mean about it — but this sign, seen at Soldier Field yesterday, seems a bit much. We're amazed this actually stayed up, we really are....

Saints vs. Bears, NFC Championship Game: 4th Quarter
- The Bears lead by 4, and Rex Grossman seems to have his balls back for the moment. To start the 4th quarter, the Bears have a 1st and 10 from the Saints 45....

Saints vs. Bears, NFC Championship Game: 3rd Quarter
- The Bears will have the ball to start the second half... Grossman drops back on first down, and picks up 17 yards to Berrian. Nice job by Berrian to go up and get it, and maybe the Bears will unshackle and let Rex be Rex from here on out. I don't know if it would be good for the Bears or not, but ...

Saints vs. Bears, NFC Championship Game: 2nd Quarter
- So, the Saints fumbled three times in the first quarter, and lost two of them. I don't know if you want to blame nerves, cold weather, Drew Brees' lack of gloves, Sean Payton's Illinois upbringing, or George Bush's lack of care for black people... but they should probably get it figured out pretty...

Saints vs. Bears, NFC Championship Game: 1st Quarter
- A fellow named Chris Daughtry is singing the national anthem right now. I don't know who he is, but he's wearing a Bears scarf, and he looks like a white Hootie....

College Hoops Compendium: UCLA Is Kinda Good
• (2) UCLA 73, (12) Arizona 69. UCLA's now lost three straight Pac-10 games for the first time since Lute Olson's hair was... actually, I think that guy was born with a full head of shiny silver hair. It may actually just be a chrome plate at this point. UCLA didn't even have Luc Richard Mbah a Mout...

Finally, Rik Smits And Michael Irvin Come Together
Aside from a cocaine-infused party at a French-Canadian brothel, I can't think of many ventures that could bring together the likes of Michael Irvin, Jose Canseco, Kordell Stewart, Darryl Strawberry and Claude Lemieux. Those four are part of the cast for the new season of Pros vs. Joes on SpikeTV....

We Make Sure The Wars Are Small Ones
You know, we Italians have our families and the church, the Irish have the homeland, the Jews their tradition, the n——s their music. What do you guys have? We have the United States of America. The rest of you are just visiting....

NFC Championship Pants Party: Bears Vs. Saints
We're not sure what more we can say about any of these games, except to say that Rex Grossman vs. Drew Brees is certainly the marquee quarterback matchup of Sunday, without question....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 2 p.m. Bracketology with Joe Lunardi: Is it right for my wife to describe our scheduled lovemaking this Saturday as "a play-in game?" • 3 p.m. Mid-Majors with Kyle Whelliston: Do you think that Creighton has a chance in the ... oh no, ...

Ice Jumping Seems To Be Rather Important In Norway
As you might have suspected, we do not speak Norwegian; we're not even that fluent in Swedish Chef. So we're going from a rough translation here, but apparently a Norwegian women's ski jumping team is in trouble for punishing poor jumps by punching the offender in the face....

You Fought The Law, And The Saints Won
If you're wondering whether or not those in the New Orleans area are as fired up for this Sunday's NFC Championship Game as the typically terrifying Bears fans are, here's a little proof for you: In a current court case involving Fay Thibodeaux Danos against Avondale Industries, they're actually pos...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. NBA Insider Chad Ford. Won't it be time prohibitive for the few remaining Warriors to haze all of the newcomers? • 3 p.m.. College hoops with Steve Lavin: No, that invitation to interview with Al Davis for the Raiders job is not ...