ns Page 2560 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

At Least He Didn't Biggie Size
So there are some new details about our new favorite assistant coach, the Lions' Joe Cullen, concerning his arrest for driving in the nude....

An Odd Way To Get Your Coach Off Your Back
Because we're just the kind of sniggering, obnoxious, wisenheimer 14-year-olds you think we are, we thought we'd giggle a bit this morning at Steelers lineback Joey Porter, who is in serious danger of becoming a staple around these parts....

Steelers Ruin Dolphins' Quest For Undefeated Season
The good news, Pittsburgh fans, is that you've won your opener 28-17 over the Miami Dolphins, behind three touchdown passes from Charlie Batch (!!!???) and an interception return for a touchdown from Joey Porter, who celebrated by setting the goalposts on fire and then eating them....

It's About Damned Time Charlie Batch Got Some National TV Exposure
You know the NFL season is upon us when Charlie Batch fastens his chinstrap and storms onto the field. It's really what the league's all about, no?...

NFL Pants Party: NFC East
People are saying that this division is so stacked that it's a pity someone has to finish last. We say think it's a pity someone has to finish first....

A Lesson In Self Preservation On The Mean Streets
Ever wonder what you would do if you had only an umbrella, and was attacked by someone wielding a long pole? What about using your walking stick to defend yourslef against a mob? (Matt Millen please take note). Thank God we've stumbled on the answer before you've gotten yourself into real trouble....

NFL Pants Party: NFC South
Well, no matter what happens with the NFC South, we will always know they have the most adventurous cheerleaders. Nothing to turn up one's nose at....

NFL Season Preview: Baltimore Ravens
We are officially at the start of the NFL season, so it's probably time to start previewing the monster. The key to the NFL's success — other than fantasy football and gambling, of course — is the rabid nature of its fans. That is to say: You don't see a lot of people painting their faces for their ...

Shuler Dangerously Close To Returning To Washington
So remember how former Redskins "quarterback" Heath Shuler is running for Congress? Well, it turns out, he actually is making serious gains in the polls, to the point that he's one of Democrats' key hopefuls for their attempt to take over the House of Representatives in the November elections....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 2 p.m. MLS with GK Dario Sala: Your family shootout to determine who empties the garbage is most amusing, if a little odd. • 3 p.m. NCAA FB with Kirk Herbstreit: You have made the traveling team of my heart. • 4 p.m. Football Scientist...

NFL Pants Party: NFC North
We do the riverdance, a manly dance, through the NFC North, land of paternity suits, custody issues, nude assistant coaches, Brett Favre and, of course, sex boats....

A Little Fired Up Down In The Red Zone
Forget the exploits of Peyton Manning and Ben Rothelisberger. Years from now, when you're balancing your great grandchildren on your knee, you can tell them that you were there on the day that Detroit Lions assistant coach Joe Cullen was arrested for driving in the nude. "But was he totally nude, gr...

The Closer: Nothing From Nothing Leaves Nothing
Notes from a day in baseball:...

NFL Pants Party: AFC West
This is the AFC West. This is not like the AFC North. You might have noticed this earlier. This is where they play in different time zones than the one in which we live. Whew. All irrefutable facts....

NFL Pants Party: AFC North
This might be our favorite division in football. Big Ben's bashed up face/appendix combo, Joey Porter, the Bengals cavalcade of feloniousness, Ray Lewis and sex tapes and murder raps ... oh, and the Browns too. What do the kids think?...

Well, Well, Look Who's Going To Be On The Colbert Report
We will confess to being big fans of "The Colbert Report." As hardcore "Daily Show" watchers since the (obviously inferior) Craig Kilborn days, we weren't sure we had time for another half hour of fake news — particularly fake news delivered as a satire of cable news show hosts we don't actually w...

NFL Pants Party: AFC East
Personally, we think the AFC East would be a lot more fun to make predictions for if Troy Brown had to play quarterback for the Patriots every game. Oh, and is Culpepper organizing the rookie party for the Dolphins this year?...

NFL Pants Party: AFC South
Because the season starts, oh, tomorrow, we figured it was probably time to start laying out some of the predictions for you, division by division. So here's a quick roundup of predictions from around the series of tubes we call the Internet....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. NFL with Chris Mortensen: You're with me, guy who looks a lot like thin(ner) Chris Berman. • 2 p.m. Baseball America's Jim Callis: I'm starting a magazine devoted exclusively to Choo Freeman and Shin-Soo Cho. Care to invest? • ...

NFL Season Preview: Kansas City Chiefs
We are officially less than a month before the start of the NFL season, so it's probably time to start previewing the monster. The key to the NFL's success — other than fantasy football and gambling, of course — is the rabid nature of its fans. That is to say: You don't see a lot of people painting ...