off Page 224 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Are The Mets Charging Players To Attend Offseason Workouts?
The Mets are currently holding offseason workouts in Port St. Lucie, Fla., and based on some chatter coming from reporters who are at the camp and local beat writers, the Mets are running some bullshit....
Let's Look At All The Shitheads Who Thought A Playoff Was A Bad Idea
We'll start with the obvious, which is that the college football playoff was fucking awesome and I am happy that it finally exists. It returned meaningful football games to New Year's Day, which I had missed dearly. It amplified the importance of regular season games, rather than diluting them. I...
How To Survive An Office Meeting: A Guide For Sad Drones
One of the terrors of the modern office job is the meeting, wherein everyone in a particular business unit of a company converges to sit around a sad, grey conference table to recite terms like report and action item and iteration and suboptimal at each other in the hope that these will conjure, m...
Police Use Tear Gas, Pepper Spray To Break Up OSU Celebrations
As soon as the Buckeyes finished off their championship, fans and students flooded the streets on and around Ohio State's campus. They were largely well-behaved, but it didn't matter: after about 90 minutes, authorities cleared out the area with mounted police, riot cops, liberal use of pepper spray...
NFL Playoff Bonuses Are A Fucking Disgrace
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering weird TV people, jock strap games, chapped lips, boner grinding, and more....
The NFL's Rules Are Dumb
The thing we have to establish to be able to talk about this with the same frame of reference is that Dez Bryant didn't catch that football. Oh sure, maybe he had the ball firmly in his grasp, maybe he was confident enough in his possession to turn and lunge for the end zone, wheeling his feet under...
T.J. Lang's Block On Nick Hayden Sparks Cowboys-Packers Shove-Fest
Green Bay offensive lineman T.J. Lang shoved Dallas defensive tackle Nick Hayden to the ground as officials blew their whistle on a Davante Adams catch, and that enough to start a big pushing match between some Packers and Cowboys....
The Patriots Annoyed John Harbaugh By Having Fun With Eligible Receivers
The Patriots needed creativity to beat the Ravens last night. Julian Edelman showed he could throw a deep ball better than Tom Brady on a trick-play touchdown bomb to Danny Amendola, but New England also ran a few plays that mixed up eligible receivers. Those formations were totally legal, but Balti...
Marshawn Lynch To Every Postgame Question: "I'm Thankful"
Marshawn Lynch had a relatively pedestrian game with 59 total rushing yards—including one impressive 25-yard run—in the Seahawk's 31-17 win over the Panthers, but after the game, the taciturn running back had to answer questions. His response of the week: "I'm thankful."...
Notorious NBA Ref Joey Crawford Knocked Out Of Game With Knee Injury
Showboating NBA referee Joey Crawford joined a long list of officials in various sports who have suffered injuries recently when he pulled up lame in the second quarter of today's Mavericks-Clippers game with what league officials are calling a knee injury....
Inconceivable Stupidity: Your Guide To Ignoring Today's NFL Playoffs
So the Mueller report was released this week, and ho-ho! Look how it confirmed the NFL's story, of never having been granted access to the tape from inside the elevator. Amazing! That's great news for the NFL....
Ref Breaks Rib After Colliding With Maple Leafs Player, Hitting Ice
Remember a couple of weeks ago, when Tyler Seguin was chirping at the referee to get out of the corner? Well here's another reason for referees to stay out: you'll get wrecked....
2014 Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Tommy Craggs
Tommy Craggs has left us to lord over every other Gawker Media site for the next year or so, after which he'll probably need work. After getting a big ol' boner in the quest to verify that Manti Te'o's dead girlfriend was indeed fake and turning Deadspin into a site for communist propaganda, he no...
2014 Deadspin Hall Of Fame Nominee: Butthole Eaten At Lions Tailgate
A butthole was eaten in a parking lot. Butt action forever....
Dumbest Man Alive Gives Dumbest Possible Explanation For Dumb HOF Vote
This year, I decided to make my life a little happier by giving up on my usual winter pastime of hate-reading terrible Hall of Fame columns written by trolls and gibbering nitwits. Stan Keister of the Hackensack Courier-Educator-Herald voted for no one and spent his entire column on the greatness of...
2014 Deadspin Hall Of Fame Nominee: Clark The Cub
The Chicago Cubs introduced a new mascot named Clark last January. We made fun of him for being a pantsless freak. Then, we gave him a dick and balls. Then, a news station used our photo of Clark with his cock and balls. That was fun....
How To Give A Ball-Bursting Football Speech
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....
2014 Deadspin Hall Of Fame Nominee: Dan Le Batard's Hall Of Fame Ballot
We wanted a Baseball Hall of Fame vote both to make a farce of the increasingly absurd electoral process and to give our readers the opportunity to have a say in that process. Someone gave us his vote. That someone was Dan Le Batard. Thanks, Dan!...