on Page 6128 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lady Golfer Is Most Hated Woman In America
A 62-year-old retiree gets a hole-in-one on the first swing of the first hole of the first round of her life. "I thought all golfers do this.'' Why you little.... [St.PeteTimes]...
When Mascots Don't Play Nice
Here is visual evidecne of the Pistol Pete/Big Blue donnybrook at the WAC tournament. Pete—sans mustache—is not afraid to go for the throat....
Venezuela Defeats Upstart Dutch. Good.
The cuddly Dutch honkballers lost to Venezuela, 3-1, in this afternoon's edition of the World Small Sample Size Bingo Tournament, which means the Netherlands' Cinderella run may soon come to a close. Dank God....
Your Regional Tournament DUAN
So much for mighty North Carolina. And the Scheyer Face movement failed to topple Duke. Michigan State got Buckeye'd. And, hey, look — Binghamton is going dancing. Hide the women and children. And condoms....
The Low-Grade Acid That Is The Iditarod
The great Alaskan sled dog race is in 2/3 of the way through, which means most of the participants are frost-bitten, sleep-deprived zombies tripping on their own brain fluid....
Fishin' Accomplished
He eluded U.S. forces much longer than Saddam Hussein, but this 13-pound carp was finally brought to justice recently as part of Operation Catch Fish, on the grounds of Camp Slayer in Baghdad....
Jamar Smith And His Alcohol-Monitoring Bracelet Find Redemption
Illinois-Purdue's just started. If you're like me - self-lacerating Illinoisan who masochistically dwells on the crap hands fate and Bruce Pearl have dealt us - you're wondering about Jamar Smith. Wonder no more....
The Lane Kiffin Era Continues Its Inexorable Slide Into Craziness
At last spring football has arrived in fair Knoxville, which surely means that rookie coach Lane Kiffin can leave all those little distractions behind and get down to some straight-up coachin', right? Right?...
Receiver Donte Stallworth Mows Down, Kills Miami Beach Man
Former Saint/Eagle/Patriot and current Browns wide receiver Donte Stallworth has reportedly ran over and killed a pedestrian in Miami Beach early this morning....
Tar Holes. Semi Heels. Talk.
Here is your North Carolina/Florida State open thread. ACC semi-final showdown. [Yahoo!]...
It's March Madness For Mascots, Too
"[W]ith 7 seconds left and New Mexico State leading 70-69, Utah State's mascot, 'Big Blue' the bull, confronted New Mexico State's 'Pistol Pete' cowboy mascot and ripped off his fake mustache." [ESPN.com...
The Entrepreneurs, At Least, Didn't Need Overtime
We've enjoyed Syracuse's little run as much as anyone - well, maybe more than Jay Bilas, who seems more in need of a bj than usual - but then along came capitalism to make it faintly annoying....
What <em>Is</em> The Matter With Kansas?
Resolved, by the Kansas state senate: that KU no longer be required to play teams in March whose name starts with the letter "B." [Cake Rocks The Party]...
Pat Burrell Says Thank You From The Bottom Of His Dong
Just like Trevor Hoffman did after leaving San Diego, Pat Burrell took out an ad to say goodbye to the fans who booed the crap out of him for most of his career....
When Lost In The Georgia Dome, Consult Your Nearest Cheerleader
Tyler Hansbrough went from victory to fail within seconds this afternoon, as he avoided being called for a critical foul in a last-second win over Virginia Tech, but then got lost leaving the court....
Grueling Tree Week Competition Produces New Stanford Tree
After a week of intense competition — which included a fog machine and dressing as Homer Simpson — a new Stanford Tree has been chosen. Unfortunately for our candidate in the video below, it wasn't him....
Marko Jaric's Marriage Might Be Saved
No charges will be filed against him in the sexual assault case due to lack of "prosocutorial merit", whatever that means. [NBCPhiladelphia]...
Streaker Fail: This Should About End This Activity, One Hopes
Not only was this streaker at an English association soccer match in Manchester subdued by a female security guard, but he was also mocked by the crowd for "severe shrinkage." Ouch. [Bury Times]...
Alexander Ovechkin Should Lay Off The Dairy Products
• If not for himself, but for the reporters who cover him: "Then, looking down at the game's score sheet, he let three loud farts rip in less than a minute..." [The 700 Level]...
The One That Confirms Greg Oden Was Always An Old-Looking Young Man
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....