on Page 6470 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night
What you missed while ghost riding the pony... • NBA: Denver needed a win to stay a game up on the Warriors, but instead they had their asses handed to them by the Jazz. • Boxing: Alfonso Gomez is probably penning a thank you note to last night's ringside doctor. • MLB: Johan Santana can give up hom...

The Parrot Will Get In Your Head
Mascots are so fat these days! Can't we make money off of that?...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering why Tim Tebow's dad doesn't marry Jesus... • Boxing: Miguel Cotto vs. Alfonso Gomez and Antonio Margarito vs. Kermit Cintron. This card is awesome. • Boxing: Antonio Tarver vs. Clinton Woods and Chad Dawson vs. Glen Johnson. Large has a great rundown of the big fight ni...

The Best Knockouts of Friday Night Fights
3. I would recommend staying on the ground for a while....

I'm Not Your Fwend, Buddy
You see, she's dressed like that because it was... raining. Forget all of that, the rain is gone and everybody is on the course in Augusta. Jim Nantz just called me his friend, so you know we're ready to go. Defending champion Zach Johnson is putting together the round of the day, but all his -4 ro...

The Return of Super Blogdome
• Bram is off to ESPN, and that's just one of 13 incites in an epic post. [Wizznutzz] • Giant Dixie cups are roaming the streets surrounding Fenway. [Screwballs] • Old blind man hits a hole in one. Well, that's what they told him. [In the Weeds] • Smart hockey player makes drinking easier at frat pa...

Bryant Mercifully Leaves the Booth
Bryant Gumbel does excellent work for HBO Sports, but as a play-by-play announcer for the NFL Network he was terrible. Fortunately both parties came to terms with that fact, and we will no longer be subjected to any of his two-minute "mournings" or legendarily indecisive first down calls. Awful Anno...

Springtime For Meyer
• In Progress — CFB: Florida Gators Spring Game. Tebow is sick and Harvin has heel problems that tend to plague men of similar greatness. [ESPN] • In Progress — Tennis: WTA Bausch & Lomb Championships, Semifinal. It's Maria Sharapova and Lindsay Davenport if I'm not mistaken. [ESPN2] • 2:00 — Hockey...

Woodrow's Woes and Rory's Belt
Rory Sabatini will have plenty of time to do some more shopping at Hot Topic this weekend, as he became one of the top players to miss the cut at the Masters. Those who did survive the first two days at Augusta National are now underway despite a bit of atmospheric wetness. KJ Choi is already +3 fo...

Dontrelle Is Injured, Fat
Dontrelle Willis lasted all of 14 pitches before leaving with a hyper-extended knee, but he was just as shitty before the injury. The high-kicking lefty couldn''t seem to get his kick all the way up, which the Baseball Tonight crew was quick to attribute to his physique, which can only be described...

Nightmare Fuel From the NHL Playoffs
Holy sweet fucking God! I'm just going to sit here for a minute while appreciating my non-destroyed testicles. Continue after the jump for last night's scores, because we might as well talk about hockey as long as we're here. Oh, and a big thanks to Enrico at the 700 Level for making this the first...

The Beckham Men Enjoy Our Finest Athletes
• The Lakers still have a shot at catching the Hornets for the top spot in the Western Conference, and they came out playing like a team that wants homecourt advantage. LA outscored New Orleans 39-20 in the first quarter before the Hornets tenacious second half comeback. However, the Lakers perseve...

About Last Night
What you missed while audibly yelping with glee... • Boxing: Carlos De Leon Jr. > Buddy McGirt Jr. De Leon proved to be the better son of a former champion when he stopped the previously undefeated McGirt in the seventh. • MLB: The Yankees proved their supremacy over the Red Sox with a 4-1 April vic...

The Week We Lost A Steely McBeam
• Congratulations ... sigh ... to Bill Self. • Buckner, Fenway, heartwarming, kind of, not really. • Gen. Petraeus on the Wii. • This is a very specific personalized jersey. • Rick Astley and Shea Stadium. • Roy Williams, and Hooters. • Steely McDrunky. • Pat Summitt is awesome. • All right, everybo...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after cursing the new Yankees Stadium forever ... • Boxing: Super featherweights, Josesito Lopez vs. Edgar Santana; super middleweights, James McGirt Jr. vs. Carlos De Leon Jr., in Miami (11 p.m., same-day tape on West Coast). Lopez-Santana, California vs. New York. Ding! [Showtime] • ...

Steroids Still Working For Shawne Merriman
Tonight, we assume you are being good Americans and going out on the town to spend, therefore fortifying our flagging economy. However, if you are one of those recluses who spend your Friday night at home getting stoned and watching Animal Planet — and by "Animal Planet," we mean "reruns of Mad Mone...

Michigan Students Will Bone You/Be Boned For OSU Tickets
According to a recent "study" conducted by the University of Michigan, there is a small fraction of the student body who will use sex in lieu of currency for various goods and services. According to Daniel Kruger, research scientist at the University of Michigan's School of Public Health, he's troub...

Max Kellerman Dropping Science, Knowledge, Etc.
Here's a pretty amusing video unearthed by the kids at Fan IQ, which features Max Kellerman, ex of just about every sports channel in every capacity, in his pre-WWL days doing his best 3rd Bass impersonation with his late brother Sam. (Sam, sadly, was viciously murdered back in '04. Gorgeous story ...

So, Whatever Happened With That "Blit Meat" Pool?
Some of you have been asking: Whatever happened to "Blit Meat?" For those who don't remember, "Blit Meat" was FoxSports.com columnist Peter Schraeger's tale of an unfortunate office drone who hosted his company's NCAA pool only to learn, alarmed, that the first place team after the Sweet 16 had the ...