out Page 209 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night
What you missed while fighting the squirrel menace ... • NFL: A 29-yard field goal attempt ... that's basically like an extra point, right? Chargers 23, Colts 21. • NBA: Heat get first win! Thanks, Knicks! • NHL: Avalanche, Stastny just keep rolling along....
Yao Vs. Yi: 250 Million Chinese Viewers Can't Be Wrong
It's a fine Friday afternoon as Awful Announcing asks the musical question, is anyone aware that the largest television audience ever for a sporting event could take place tonight? That's right folks, it's Yi vs. Yao! From the Houston Chronicle:...
Who Will Be Playboy's Sexiest Sportscaster In 2008?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Feel free to email him your thoughts....
About Last Night
What you missed while getting pizza rolls for birthday month ... • College football: Despite three fumbles, Pat White keeps West Virginia in bowl championship picture. • NHL: The great Eric Lindros retires. Wait, he was still playing? • NBA: Bulls finally realize that the regular season has started....
About Last Night
What you missed while stomping the yard ... • NBA: Many of us are not ready to live in a world where the Knicks are good. • NHL: Eaves of Destruction ... Senators 5, Maple Leafs 1. • College basketball: The Oilers do not fear the Big Ten! Findlay 70, Ohio State 68....
About Last Night
What you missed because you didn't have a good excuse to miss work ... • NBA: Hey, perhaps the Mavericks aren't finished after all. Dallas 107, Houston 98. • NFL: Big Ben approves of throwback unis. Steelers 38, Ravens 7. • College basketball: Walking in Memphis ... Rose debut is sweet indeed....
About Last Night
What you missed while walking your Omen devil hound ... • NFL: Yes, they are booing you, Terrell. But they are gentle boos ... boos of love. Cowboys 38, Eagles 17. • NBA: Pistons are back at full strength; look out, world. • NASCAR: Jimmie Johnson wins at Texas Motor Speedway, takes Nextel Cup lead,...
About Last Night...
What you missed, thanks in part to those damn singing condoms... • NCAA Football: Arizona State travels up to Oregon, dies of dysentery. • NASCAR: Carl Edwards overcomes adversity, rookie drivers to win NASCAR's minor league circuit. • MLS: New York England Revolution tax New York Red Bulls without ...
About Last Night ...
♬ And if you say to me tomorrow ♬ oh what fun it all would be ♬ then what's to stop us pretty baby ♬ but what you missed and what should never be ♬ • NHL: Zednik scores twice, but only once in our heart, in Panthers 4-2 in over Sabres. • NBA: For once, Jason Kidd is the humiliated one, in Nets 106-6...
So There's This Big Soccer Game Today, I'm Told
Okay. Take a look to the east. See the sun rising? Okay, look at the little blotch of land right below it. Don't see it? Here, use my binoculars. Hmm... you still don't see it? Okay, well look at this Mercator projection map. Right there. England. Located somewhere in that country, probably in that ...
Greetings, Spinheads
Hello again, faceless internet cro-mags. A.J. Daulerio here to guide you through this glorious autumn day full of dead leaves on the dirty ground and sweaters stuffed with cold tits. Hopefully, I'll play a small part in making your day of corporate drudgery fly by as quickly as possible so you can a...
About Last Night
What you missed while getting Jack Bauer arrested ... • College football: Sean Glennon beats Georgia Tech while wearing one of their own jerseys. • NBA: Our new Houston Rockets overlords have installed Tracy McGrady as their king ... • NHL: Henrik Zetterberg beats out Flames to lead Red Wings to sev...
Raiders Fans Would Rather Look Elsewhere, Thank You
It's not easy being a Raiders fan. First off: What goes with black? Seriously! It's also difficult to find time to cheer, what with all the drinking of infant's blood. And worst off, the Raiders' lousy game with the Texans this Sunday happens to be at the same time as The Most Important Battle Betwe...
About Last Night
You wake up with your head inside a pumpkin and sans pants. We'll fill you in ... • NBA: The Tempest that is Zydrunas Ilgauskas not enough to stave off Mavericks. Dallas 92, Cleveland 74. • NHL: Modano reaches milestone [redacted]. Modano still one assist short. Blackhawks 5, Stars 4. • Soccer: Welc...
About Last Night
What you missed while mourning the passing of Robert Goulet ... • NBA: Bryant scores 45, Lakers lose ... two great tastes that go great together. • NHL: Thrashers beat Canadiens in shootout ... a sentence which would have looked very odd if you had seen it 10 years ago. • MLB: Red Sox victory parade...
About Last Night
What you missed while scouring eBay for dog mittens ... • NFL: Yeah, it's the Broncos' run defense that's the problem. Packers 19, Broncos 13, OT. • NHL: Rangers lose teeth, win game, 3-1 over Lightning. • Tennis: Mario Ancic rallies to beat someone with a hyphenated name in Paris Masters....
And Jesus Said, Turn The Other Cheek
Two surprising things about this item: 1. It didn't happen in Long Island, and 2. It wasn't featured in any of the Porky's movies. Other than that, hey, I stopped being shocked at the antics of youth sports parents and coaches long ago....
About Last Night
What you missed while winning the cardboard tube fighting championship ... • MLB: Boston sweeps Colorado in four, will now move on to ... to ... um, did you say baseball season is over? Don't be ridiculous ... • NFL: An American Slopfest in London ... Dolphins now winless in Europe as well after 13-...