ow Page 1101 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch with your new friend, Mr. Happy Toilet ... • Arena Football League: Chicago at Kansas City (8:30 p.m., ET). Here's hoping for plenty of air-time for the Brigade Girls. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Cleveland (7 p.m., ET). Hopefully it will be above 12 degrees. [ESPN] • NHL: Western Conferen...

The Cowboys Have A Preferred Long Distance Provider
They're still constructing the Dallas Cowboys' new stadium, and if you're one of those people who thought the Cowboys were too iconic a franchise to fall prey to stadium naming right, well, stop being so foolish....

Erin Andrews' Calves Await Your Scrutiny
This candid photo of ESPN college sports vixen Erin Andrews attempting to gain the attention of a well-Under Armoured Tim Tebow suggests that the popular NCAA reporter princess is working very, very hard to get a salient quote from the Florida quarterback during the Gators annual spring game....

About Last Night
What you missed while telling the Pope to stay off your lawn ... • NBA: Lakers cross the Rubicon, take control of Western Conference. • NHL: Taking a 3-0 lead and then giving up four unanswered, in the playoffs? That's gotta sting a little. Flames 4, Sharks 3. (Hmm, I think we may have identified th...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while patiently waiting for Tiger to turn it up a notch... • MLB: New York Yankees at Boston Red Sox. Sigh [ESPN] • Hockey: New Jersey Devils at New York Rangers and San Jose Sharks at Calgary Flames. [Versus] • Animation: The Simpsons. Thank god. [FOX]...

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man
The Visitor's Locker Room compares Green to a legendary infomercial pitchman, but I've always enjoyed this guy... ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering why Tim Tebow's dad doesn't marry Jesus... • Boxing: Miguel Cotto vs. Alfonso Gomez and Antonio Margarito vs. Kermit Cintron. This card is awesome. • Boxing: Antonio Tarver vs. Clinton Woods and Chad Dawson vs. Glen Johnson. Large has a great rundown of the big fight ni...

Bryant Mercifully Leaves the Booth
Bryant Gumbel does excellent work for HBO Sports, but as a play-by-play announcer for the NFL Network he was terrible. Fortunately both parties came to terms with that fact, and we will no longer be subjected to any of his two-minute "mournings" or legendarily indecisive first down calls. Awful Anno...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after cursing the new Yankees Stadium forever ... • Boxing: Super featherweights, Josesito Lopez vs. Edgar Santana; super middleweights, James McGirt Jr. vs. Carlos De Leon Jr., in Miami (11 p.m., same-day tape on West Coast). Lopez-Santana, California vs. New York. Ding! [Showtime] • ...

About Last Night
What you missed while playing the world's biggest game of Where's Waldo ... • MLB: Boss, I demand a Reyes ... Mets beat Phillies in 12th thanks in great part to the baserunning stylings of Jose Reyes. • College basketball: Note to Self ... be sure to turn down offers and stay at Kansas. • NHL: Preda...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after your flight is cancelled ... • Men's College Hockey: NCAA Division I tournament semifinals in Denver; Boston College vs. North Dakota (6 p.m., ET), Notre Dame vs. Michigan (9:30 p.m., ET). There is no team more dangerous, or more politically incorrect, than the North Dakota Fight...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you pry the remote from his cold, dead hands ... • MLB: Phillies vs. Mets (7 p.m., ET) Time for Pelfrey Magic! [ESPN2] • NBA: Celtics vs. Wizards (7 p.m., ET); Suns vs. Spurs (9:30 p.m., ET). It's Guys Night Out! [ESPN] • NHL: Eastern Conference quarterfinals, Game 1, Senators vs...

Terrell Owens: Thespian
Terrell Owens, Dallas Cowboys wide receiver and suicide survivor, is a man who's always had a flair for melodrama. Now, the Pro Bowl receiver will get to utilize some of those off-the-field skills in an upcoming sitcom starring ex-Public Enemy hype man and reality television star, Flavor Flav. The s...

The West Virginia Power's Mascot Has A Rather Large Package
Here's Charile, one of the mascots of the West Virginia Power baseball team, a Class-AA affiliate of the Milwaukee Brewers. The Power celebrated the beginning of their season recently with a contest to see who could turn in the best drawing of one of their colorful mascots. The winner was Ariel Bens...

Steely McDrunky
In even more startling DUI news, Pittsburgh police have arrested one of the men who played Pittsburgh Steelers horrifying mascot, Steely McBeam....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch when your good friend Iona Knipl comes over ... • Women's college basketball: NCAA Division I tournament championship game, Tennessee vs. Stanford in Tampa (8:30 p.m., ET). I would not like to be in the middle if Tara and Pat get into a brawl. [ESPN] • MLB: Cardinals at Astros (8:05 p....

Roy Williams' Divided Loyalties
As we continue to come to terms with a planet that has Bill Self as a national championship coach — we fully expect to see the Official NCAA Title Toupee on sale soon — we turn our attention to the Jayhawks' newest fan: North Carolina coach Roy Williams....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you recover from a very, very bad accident ... • College basketball: NCAA tournament championship, Kansas vs. Memhpis, at San Antonio (9 p.m., ET). No, it's too late for my brackets! I'm finished; go on and save yourself! [CBS] • MLB: Tampa Bay at New York Yankees (7 p.m., ET). Rays...

The NCAA Tournament, Like Everything Else, Is Run By Larry Brown
Storming The Floor previews today's NCAA Championship Game between the Kansas Jayhawks and the Memphis Tigers....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while exercising ... • 7 p.m. — Womens Final Four: Connecticut vs. Stanford; LSU vs. Tennessee. It's going to be UConn-Tennessee again, so why bother? [ESPN] • 8 p.m. — MLB: Chicago White Sox at Detroit Tigers. Save some run support for the rest of the team, Brandon Inge. You wouldn't ...