ow Page 1114 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights


At Least One Super Bowl Ad Won't Be Funny
I've just been wired an announcement from the Department of Stuff We Already Friggin' Learned In Third Grade: drugs are bad for you and they're illegal. Did you know they're illegal? They're also bad for you. Apparently the DSWAFLTG is not on the same page with the WHONDCP (White House Office of Nat...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while making Baghdad's first-ever snow infidels... • NHL: Wild top Blackhawks 5-2 as Josh Harding saves 41; 300 wounded. • NBA: LeBron James leads Cavs to: (a) win, (b) loss, (c) the locker room at halftime, (d) none of the above, (e) both a and c. • Justice system: Bail shocks O.J. ...

Who Are We? "The Blues!" Who Are We Gonna Beat? "The Blues!"
There doesn't seem to be a bevy of interesting games — even for soccer fans! — save for one game, Man City and Everton. They're separated by a mere three points at the top of the standings "tables," and Man City hasn't lost a game "match" to anyone recently except Tottenham. That kind of consistency...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while playing with your Mr. Potato Head ... • NBA: Miami at New Orleans (8 p.m., ET); Milwaukee at Los Angeles Lakers (10:30 p.m., ET) [ESPN]. Visit the famed French Quarter before the game. And there's one in New Orleans too, I hear. • Boxing: Super middleweights, Edison Miranda "Righ...

NFL Divisional Pants Party: Cowboys Vs. Giants
You know what would really blow people's minds? If Jessica Simpson would have dated Eli Manning instead. Man, those guys would have some scintillating conversations....

Strahan Would Totally Tap That
At first glance it's moral support from an unlikely source: Giants defensive end Michael Strahan says that Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson should be given their space. Leave Romo alone! He's a human being! Etc., etc. But you and I know what the real deal is here. Hey Tony, if you ever get tired of her...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after more interactive fun with tigers ... • College basketball: West Virginia at Louisville (7 p.m., ET); Illinois at Wisconsin (9 p.m., ET); [ESPN]; Arkansas at Auburn (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2]. This young, scrappy Illini five just could win it all if they figure a way to tickle the nets ...

Brady Quinn's Unfortunate Circumstances
With the news yesterday that the Browns are looking to sign Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson to long-term contract, we look ominously to a future that, sadly ... could be Brady Quinn-less....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you once again blow off your trip to the Museum of Laziness ... • College basketball: Duke at Temple (7 p.m., ET). Won't be the same without Dickie V's barbed-wire irritating tones [ESPN]; Pittsburgh at South Florida (7:30 p.m., ET) [ESPN2] • NBA: Detroit at Dallas (9 p.m., ET). ...

Who's Now? Is Never Going Away
The sad, terrifying truth about this summer's "Who's Now?" segment on ESPN is that it was a huge success. It ended up being one of the most searched terms on ESPN.com. Seriously. We suppose we shouldn't find this too surprising; it seems like exactly the type of thing teenagers search for, and those...

The End Of The Bowl Season, At Last
Well, the bowls are finally over, and we thank The Wizard Of Odds for this compendium of amusing screenshots from each bowl. Ah, the bowls: They were over before we even noticed we were supposed to notice....

One More NFL Prop Bet, This Time With Jessica Simpson
No matter how excited you might be for Sunday's Cowboys-Giants game, we assure you, your 16-year-old mistress niece is more so. Because she wants to see if Jessica Simpson is going to be there. (We think. Honestly, we don't know any teenagers. Swear.)...

Deadspin At Super Bowl XLII
We are put a wee 19 days from the Super Bowl, held in the Pink Taco in Glendale, Arizona. And we are very pleased to announce that, for the first time, we will be attending....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you demand a recount in the Greatest Will Of All Time voting ... • College basketball: Indiana at Michigan (7 p.m., ET); Florida at Alabama (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN]. Roll out the Big Ten goodness. • College basketball: Wichita State at Missouri State. (7 p.m., ET). Don't Shock me, bro. [...

Brett Favre And The Men Who Love Him
I just love it when a journalist develops a man crush on an athlete and loses all perspective. It seems to happen a lot with Brett Favre for some reason; perhaps its his indominable spirit ... or his eyes, which are like limpid pools ... . Anyway, count Frank Cooney, founder and publisher of The Spo...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you pipe in fake crowd noise to your living room ... • College football: BCS National Championship game, LSU vs. Ohio State, at New Orleans (8:15 p.m., ET). If only the bowl season could last forever. [Fox] • College basketball: Alabama State at Jackson State (8:30 p.m.) Do not taun...

Jessica Simpson Is Officially The Yoko Ono Of Sports
First of all, this post makes me feel dirty; Pat O'Brien dirty. And we did talk about it over the weekend, so perhaps you could skip the whole thing? No? Read on then....

Salvaging The Massacre In Mobile
Poor Illinois. Poor Hawaii. You folks think you can fathom utter and total humiliation in a January bowl game? Because when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your alma mater's football team, you'll know what to do!...