ow Page 1165 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while pleasantly yachting ... • College football: Maryland at West Virginia. Understandably, we have Owen Schmitt Fever. [ESPN] • High school football: Shreveport (La.) Evangel at Southlake Carroll, Texas. Thursday Night Lights. [FSN] • MLB: Philadelphia at Atlanta. In Bizzaro World, P...
Imagine What They'll Call It When They Actually Use It
Far be it from us to pretend to be experts in branding, but this new marketing gimmick for the Cleveland Browns, obviously a "riff" (and "riff" is being generous) on the Steelers' Terrible Towel, is actually called The Dirty Brown Towel....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch listening obsessively to Bob Dylan's radio show... • Basketball: World Championship for Women, preliminary round, USA vs. Nigeria, at Sao Paolo, Brazil. Do they use that same oddly-colored ball? [FSN] • MLB: Texas at Detroit. Tigers holding on by their fingernails ... come on! If you d...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as it is revealed that Lance Armstrong actually cheated by using Flubber ... • Basketball: World Championship for Women, preliminary round, USA vs. China, at Sao Paolo, Brazil. Same-day tape ... Internet users, please do not reveal the shocking conclusion of the USA vs. China game. [F...
Everybody Needs Some Tailgating Backup
We know those who use wheelchairs are capable of doing just about anything that those who can stand and walk can do; we suspect some of you are doing that very thing right now. Unless you're trying to get to the upper deck of RFK Stadium, nothing should stand in your way as a sports fan....
Now That's A Serious Looking Contract
We don't mean to imply that there's a possibly new New York Islanders general manager Garth Snow — shown here on a "scouting trip" — might not necessarily be ready for life in a board room, considering just last year he was the team's backup goalie....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you wonder what the heck ever happpened to that third Manning brother ... • MLB: Chicago Cubs at Atlanta. Why not beat the rush and give Dusty his going-away present now? [WGN] • NFL: Minnesota at Washington. Look out for Fred Smoot under those pileups. [ESPN] • NFL: San Diego at Oa...
To Watch Tonight...
• NASCAR: Nextel Cup, Chevy Rock & Roll 400. When is the Gangsta Rap 400? 7:30, TNT. • Tennis: US Open, Women's Final. Maria Sharapova vs. Justine Henin-Hardenne. 8:00, CBS. • MLS Soccer: Real Salt Lake @ DC United. Salt Lake's been known to start a sissy slap fight when things don't go their way. 7...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you remain stunned that they don't sell booze inside Rutgers Stadium ... • Basketball: Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony, at Springfield, Mass. (May be joined in progress if "Stump The Schwab" runs long). [ESPN Classic] • College football: Pittsburgh at Cincinnati. It's in Ohio, so wh...
An Odd Way To Get Your Coach Off Your Back
Because we're just the kind of sniggering, obnoxious, wisenheimer 14-year-olds you think we are, we thought we'd giggle a bit this morning at Steelers lineback Joey Porter, who is in serious danger of becoming a staple around these parts....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while celebrating ESPN's birthday. • College football: Oregon State at Boise State. The road trip which features the signage: "Last gas for 677 miles." [ESPN] • MLB: Detroit at Minnesota. Could this be the series that the Tigers relinquish the AL Central? Um, no. [ESPN2] • NFL: Miami a...
NFL Season Preview: Dallas Cowboys
We are officially at the start of the NFL season, so it's probably time to start previewing the monster. The key to the NFL's success — other than fantasy football and gambling, of course — is the rabid nature of its fans. That is to say: You don't see a lot of people painting their faces for thei...
NFL Pants Party: NFC East
People are saying that this division is so stacked that it's a pity someone has to finish last. We say think it's a pity someone has to finish first....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while thinking maybe it's time to give Isringhausen a little break ... • MLB: Chicago White Sox at Boston. Somehow, they've managed to arrange different results for each respective network. [ESPN] [WGN] • Tennis: U.S. Open, at New York. We think we saw George Costanza on TV with his fa...
NFL Pants Party: AFC North
This might be our favorite division in football. Big Ben's bashed up face/appendix combo, Joey Porter, the Bengals cavalcade of feloniousness, Ray Lewis and sex tapes and murder raps ... oh, and the Browns too. What do the kids think?...
"This Is The Parts Where They Say Who They Thinks Gonna Win"
In his nightmares, this is what Chris Fowler imagines every viewer of College GameDay is like....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you ponder "Who was our best president ever?" ... • Boxing: Cory Spinks vs. Larry Marks. Light middleweights, in case you were wondering. [ESPN] • Tennis: US Open, Day 9 coverage from the USTA Tennis Center, Flushing Meadows, New York. This had better not interfere with Monk. [USA] ...
The Daily Closer: Red Pinstripes In Morning, NL Take Warning
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Waiting Patiently For Art Modell To Die
I know this is perverse, but I can't quite decide just how perverse. Actually, I probably know, but choose not to acknowledge it, because I also find it amusing....