ow Page 1180 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Pity The Poor Derek Lowe
A couple of days ago, the Los Angeles Times' Bill Plaschke wrote a story about the emotional difficulties of Dodgers pitcher Derek Lowe, who last year famously left his wife for Fox Sports broadcaster Carolyn Hughes. (You thought we were gonna say "Fox Sports broadcaster Tom Arnold." Admit it.)...
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What to watch as you recoil at the horrible real-life tragedy of Dr. McDreamy ... • World Baseball Classic: South Korea vs. Taiwan, Japan vs. China, at Tokyo. It's finally here! Let's play ball! We can't understand any of the signs in the stands! [ESPN2] • College Basketball: Central Intercollegiate...
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What to watch as you realize your hi-definition TV is defining some things you'd rather not have defined ... • College Basketball: Texas at Texas A&M, Utah at TCU. Yeah, if we had a nickel for every time a horned frog was mentioned in the Bible ... [ESPN2] • College Women's Basketball: Baylor at Tex...
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A kinky three-way between your ass, the sofa and the TV ... • College Basketball: LSU at South Carolina, Illinois at Minnesota. Are we having Illini pie or Gopher stew? [ESPN] • NHL: Minnesota at Colorado. And we're back, after the longest layoff since the strike. Except for the Swedes, of course, w...
Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Peter Vecsey
Forgive the analogy, but it occurred to us that a Peter Vecsey column is a lot like going hunting with Dick Cheney. If you're loud and obnoxious enough to scare the little critters out of hiding and keep loudly blasting away, you're bound to hit something eventually. And those innocent people who ...
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What to watch as you realize that the Wayne Industries logo in "Batman Begins" looks exactly like the Indiana University logo ... • College Men's Basketball: Pittsburgh at West Virginia, Oklahoma State at Oklahoma. Those flaming objects hurled toward the court must mean it's rivalry week. [ESPN] • N...
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• NBA: Boston @ LA Lakers. A rare Sunday night NBA game on ESPN. Solid....
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• Boxing: Fernando Vargas vs. Shane Mosley. I'd watch, but I can only think of about 75,000 ways to better spend $44.95....
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What to watch as you realize those people on the TV show "Lost" may not even really want to get rescued at all ... • Boxing: Light middleweights, Oscar Diaz vs. Russell Jordan, at Verona, N.Y. Oh Lord, give these men the strength to go forth and pound each other to a fine powder. [ESPN2] • NASCAR Ne...
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What to watch after you discover that Wal-Mart does not have refills for your web shooters ......
Larry Brown Suicide Watch: Day 2
A reader tips us to the photo that was on the ESPN front this morning: "You know how they say 'a picture's worth a thousand words?' Check out this photo from the front page of ESPN.com's web site this morning. Larry Brown's countenance pretty much sums it up. Funny picture."...
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What to watch as you notice that your back yard is beginning to resemble the scenery in the TV show "Lost" ...• College Basketball: Duke at Georgia Tech. February Madness, courtesy of the ACC. [ESPN] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, second round, first leg, Chelsea vs. Barcelona, at London. Your att...
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What to watch as you play with your didgeridoo ... • College Basketball: Illinois at Michigan, Alabama at Arkansas. We only pray you're purchased enough snacks for two games. [ESPN] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, second round, first leg, Real Madrid vs. Arsenal, at Madrid. In our dream, Iker Casil...
Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Bob Sansevere
The St. Paul Pioneer-Press has an annual contest called "Average Joe Columnist," in which a field of 16 non-journalists submit sports articles, and are judged American Idol-style by sports editor Mike Bass and columnist Bob Sansevere. The latter, it seems, fancies himself in the Simon Cowell role — ...
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What to watch as your latest ringtone download finally makes your cell phone more interesting than you are ... • College Basketball: West Virginia at Syracuse, Oklahoma at Texas Tech. Bobby Knight vs. Kelvin Sampson in the battle of non-sports-coat-wearing coaches. [ESPN] • College Basketball: Gonza...
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• College Basketball: #14 UCLA @ USC. You know those ESPN promo spots that feature different pregame traditions for various teams around the country? Anyone else think the UCLA one is really lame?...
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• College Basketball: Pittsburgh @ Marquette. The last time they played, Marquette star guard Dominic James was injured on what Marquette felt was a cheap shot. Maybe someone will punch Carl Krauser in the junk....
Just How Drunk Was Eddie Sutton?
Well, he blew a .22. To figure out how many drinks per hour that is, first, we have to take a guess at the man's weight. Now, I've been fired from my job trying to guess people's weight at the carnival three or four times, so I'm not very good at it. But if we guess an even 200 pounds, consuting ...
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What To Watch While Pre-Ordering Books On Amazon ... • College Basketball: North Carolina at Virginia; Cincinnati at Xavier. If it's wrong to have Musketeer Madness, then we don't want to be right. [ESPN] • NBA: Detroit at New York; Los Angeles Lakers at Sacramento. Larry Brown gets close to anoth...
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What to watch as you work out some dance steps to "Sweet Shaun Alexander" ... • College Basketball: North Carolina State at Duke. Honestly, do people around here even realize that the Panthers are still playing football? [ESPN] • High School Basketball: Episcopal (Pa.) vs. Neumann-Goretti (Pa.), at ...