ow Page 413 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rams Beat Cowboys With A Star Turn From A Beefy, Beautiful Jon Gruden Castoff

Perhaps when Jon Gruden insisted that he got “a lot of phone calls from people who are dying to come and play here,” he was telling the truth, and those players didn’t mention how long they planned on staying. Even the briefest stints in Oakland appear to be performance-enhancing. ...

Dak Prescott Gets Sacked By His Own Lineman While Standing Upright

The officials in tonight’s Cowboys-Rams game made their own avant-garde contribution to the NFL’s constantly expanding reality. Is a catch a catch if no one recovers what is later ruled a fumble? Did a play actually end on the one-inch line if it was originally ruled a touchdown? And now: can a quar...

Chiefs Fans Threw Snowballs During Their Playoff Game

The Kansas City Chiefs rolled over the Indianapolis Colts, 31-13, to advance to the AFC Championship Game. To keep themselves amused during the blowout, Chiefs fans threw snowballs onto the field at least three different times....

Report: Jason Garrett's Contract Will Be Extended To A Second Decade After Second Playoff Win

Dallas Cowboys coach Jason Garrett’s contract was set to expire after the 2019 season, but Ian Rapoport reports that Jerry Jones will extend it after the playoffs—no matter what happens tonight against the Rams. ...

Georgetown Freshmen Mac McClung And James Akinjo Come Up Clutch Against Providence

It took two extra periods of play for the Georgetown Hoyas to take down the Providence Friars this afternoon, 96-90. But the home team wouldn’t have gotten to that second overtime in the first place were not for two freshman sinking two clutch shots, including one buzzer-beater, when the Hoyas neede...

Tim Tebow To Have Sex Soon

Famously abstinent former football star and current baseball scrub Tim Tebow got engaged to girlfriend and 2017 Miss Universe Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters yesterday....

White Sox Sign Shitty Player

The Chicago White Sox did their part to keep the hot stove warm enough that you could put an oven mitt on it, then come back 10 minutes later to find it mildly toasty and perhaps worthy of being ranked as a warmth, by announcing the signing of shitty outfielder Jon Jay today....

Great, The Steelers Are Going To Do This Whole Shit Again With Antonio Brown

The Pittsburgh Steelers spent a significant portion of their 2018 season alienating running back Le’Veon Bell for wanting job security, then the players who were there argued with each other, and then they had to hope for the Browns to win in order to get into the playoffs. (The Browns did not win.)...

Save Yourself The Embarrassment And Stop Guarding Markus Howard

It was a miracle of a shot from Marquette’s Sam Hauser that sent the 21st-ranked Golden Eagles’ game against Creighton into overtime on Wednesday night. But it was the guy who inbounded and assisted on that dramatic buzzer-beater who utterly dominated the proceedings, and who did the most to get Mar...

Houston Cougars' Undefeated Streak Snapped By Buzzer-Beating Charge Call

The Houston Cougars have put themselves in elite company this college basketball season. Before tonight, they were one of three undefeated teams left in Division-I alongside No. 2 Michigan and No. 4 Virginia. Sure, the Cougars had played 13 of their first 15 games at home, but an undefeated streak t...

Dumb Little Pissbaby Trevor Bauer Got In Trouble And It's Going To Make Him So Mad He Can't Tweet About This Blog<em></em>

Less than three hours after tweeting “I’ve done nothing wrong,” Trevor Bauer sort of admitted it was wrong of him to harass a 21-year-old woman on Twitter for days and days....

Gregg Williams Is Now Free To Talk To All Of Those NFL Teams Who Wanted Him As A Head Coach<em></em>

The Browns decided today that offensive coordinator Freddie Kitchens will be the team’s next head coach. He will be tasked with leading the Browns into what appears to be a promising future, and he will not be joined on that journey by defensive coordinator Gregg Williams....

Karl-Anthony Towns Is Sneakily Becoming An Adept Passer

Karl-Anthony Towns has gone on a tear in the new year, averaging 28.3 points on 62 percent true shooting and 15.0 boards through three games. A more surprising and slightly longer-running trend, meanwhile, is his average of 4.6 assists over his last 10 games. As a seven-footer with range out to thre...

Marquette's Markus Howard Will Shoot Over Anyone, From Anywhere

Marquette’s 70-52 win over Xavier on Sunday wasn’t especially exciting, since the Golden Eagles never trailed and spent most of the second half up by double digits. But if there was a moment when a struggling Xavier team looked to have a glimmer of hope, it was with about eight minutes to go in the ...

Derrick Rose, Who Should Definitely Relax, To His Doubters: "Kill Yourself" [Update]

In a press conference this afternoon, Timberwolves guard Derrick Rose twice told reporters that anyone who doubts his basketball ability should kill themselves. Per Minneapolis Star Tribune reporter Chris Hine:...

Trevor Bauer Has Been Harassing A Woman For More Than A Day Now

Science boy, drone enthusiast, and big dumb asshole Trevor Bauer likes to be a spicy weirdo on Twitter, where he’s prone to holding forth about racism and anti-Trump bias and blocking people who criticize him. On Saturday night he stepped up his online crankiness when he launched an ongoing harassme...

Philip Rivers To Injured Matthew Judon: "That's What You Get!"

Philip Rivers has not taken too kindly to the type of hits he’s been on the receiving end of against the Baltimore Ravens’ defense. He vented his frustration to Matthew Judon near the end of the first half when the linebacker got hurt after getting another post-throw hit in on Rivers. After the whis...

I Mean, He Does Carry The Ball

The Seahawks Will Have To Finish Out A Playoff Game Without A Kicker

Seahawks kicker Seabastian Janikowski injured his leg on a missed 57-yard field goal attempt at the end of the first half of tonight’s defensive struggle against the Cowboys, and Seattle has apparently decided that they don’t trust star punter Michael Dickson to attempt even extra points....

Cowboys WR Allen Hurns Leaves Game On Stretcher After Gruesome Leg Injury

In the first quarter of tonight’s playoff game, Cowboys receiver Allen Hurns was tackled by Seahawks safety Bradley McDougald. As Hurns was fighting to stay upright, McDougald fell onto Hurns’s left leg and broke it....