ow Page 627 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Super Bowl Fight! Super Bowl Fight!
Boy, it's a good thing we had a fight to liven things up after such an uninteresting game, eh?...
NBC Cut Away From Doug Baldwin's Wonderfully Vulgar TD Celebration
Is this the Randy Moss moon? Or are we calling it Doug Baldwin pooping out a football? Who cares, this rules. Blame NBC for cutting away before we could see if Doug did the shimmy, but those are good mooning/pooping fundamentals either way. ...
I Can't Stop Watching This Psycho Local Ad About Heroin
This advertisement is an attempt to warn viewers of the dangers of heroin, and it aired during the second local break of tonight's Super Bowl broadcast in St. Louis. The Drug War fails again; this ad makes me want heroin really bad right now. Anybody else?...
We'll Never Forget You, Katy Perry With Nazi Sharks
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Jeremy Lane's INT Came At A Cost: This Very Gross Injury
Please take our word for it. Don't click through to the rest of this post. You really don't want to....
Tom Brady's Got The Interceptionface
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It Took Five Minutes For An Officiating Controversy To Emerge
This is roughing the kicker. It has been called roughing the kicker all season. Officials did not call this roughing the kicker. (We do not know how inflated the punter's ball was.)...
Report: "Ball Boy" Who Took Footballs Into Bathroom Is An Elderly Man
The investigation into how numerous footballs used by the Patriots became deflated during the AFC Championship Game has focused on the Patriots-employed ball boy that took the balls from the referees locker room to the field. In-between he stopped off in what was at first ominously reported as "an...
Roger Goodell Refuses To Answer NBC's Questions
Roger Goodell threatened to fine Marshawn Lynch $500,000 if he didn't answer media questions this week. Let's all be surprised, then, that King Hypocrite refused NBC's request he answer their questions on-camera....
Puppy Bowl, Fish Bowl, Kitten Bowl: Counterprogramming The Super Bowl
The over/under for the number of households that will tune in to watch the Super Bowl tonight is 113 million. There has never been a larger event in the history of television. What I'm saying here is you don't have to be a fan of football to tune in. People who don't watch this Super Bowl will spend...
The Porn Movies You Could Be Watching Instead Of The Super Bowl
Most networks don't even bother attempting to program against the Super Bowl. But every channel has to air something, including your local cable provider's porn channels. Here's are the titles of porn movies airing on Time Warner Cable opposite the Super Bowl, according to today's TV Guide:...
The Future Has Arrived
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Gronk Is The Best Tight End In Football, And The Patriots' Best Chance
Most historians credit former Michigan and Green Bay star Ron Kramer as the first "real" player at the position. "He was the prototype," Packers quarterback Bart Starr once told me. At a shade over 6-3 and 235-240 pounds, Kramer had nearly the mass of an offensive lineman and was quick enough to get...
Watch Tonight's <i>SNL</i> Cold Open Feat. Richard Sherman & Marshawn Lynch
Tonight's Saturday Night Live cold open featuring "Richard Sherman" and a reticent-as-always "Marshawn Lynch" improved greatly over last week's weak Ballghazi-themed effort. Jay Pharoah pulls out a pretty solid attempt at Sherman's intensity....
Boris Diaw Buzzer-Beater Attempt Beans Gregg Popovich
It's probably a bad idea to hit your coach in the head with a basketball, but somehow that happened tonight as Boris Diaw's poor attempt at a first-half buzzer-beater instead hit coach Gregg Popovich in the head as Pop headed toward the locker room, no doubt disgusted by the Spurs' poor play. Pop di...
The Players' Tribune Censors Darnell Dockett's "Unfiltered Voice"
The Players' Tribune—the number one sports website for boring, ghostwritten first person accounts from athletes—is having (or perhaps more accurately, had) Darnell Dockett tweet from their Twitter account today:...
Marshawn Lynch's Outtakes From Gaming With Gronk Are Also Very Funny
Marshawn Lynch and Gronk played some video games on Conan's show the other day and it was great. Attempting to satiate an insatiable demand for all things Marshawn Lynch, Team Coco has uploaded a video of outtakes from the shoot, appropriately calling it "Marshawnisms." What's a Marshawnism? Probabl...
Judge Decides Aaron Hernandez Murder Trial Jurors Can Watch Super Bowl
The Aaron Hernandez murder trial began on Thursday, and yesterday Judge Susan Garsh had an interesting decision to make: Should jurors be allowed to watch tomorrow's Super Bowl? While the NFL certainly hopes their biggest game of the year isn't sullied with even the mere mention of the alleged doubl...