ow Page 669 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dumb Person Has Bad Idea For How To "Control" College Athletes
This, by Matt Hayes at the Sporting News, was actually published yesterday, but since I haven't seen any angry reaction to it yet, I can only assume it's because we're all still so taken aback by the strangeness of a screed that wouldn't be out of place scrawled on a bathroom wall in feces. But you ...

Meta Analysis: How Many Licks To Reach The Center Of A Tootsie Pop?
The world may never know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. But we can at least use data to make an educated guess....

Punch-Throwing Skipper Jack McDowell Livens Up Minor League Brawl
The Ogden Raptors and Idaho Falls Chukars, two minor league baseball teams that likely mean nothing to you, went 16 innings last night, but the best part was a bench-clearing brawl in the tenth. Even the managers got into it—including a former AL Cy Young winner....

The Rangers Cap Off Rough Sixth Inning With Outfield Beanball
The Yankees scored seven runs in the sixth inning, the last coming thanks to this fielding miscue in right-center field. Alex Rios looks like he had a bead on a fly ball from Brett Gardner, but closes his glove too soon, causing it to bounce into centerfielder Leonys Martin and ricochet off his skul...

Robbie Lawler Returned From Oblivion To Impose His Will On The World
Sometime shortly after Robbie Lawler started hitting Matt Brown unreasonably hard in San Jose, Calif. Saturday night, a low rumble shook my apartment. It felt and sounded strangely like—and turned out actually to be—fireworks. This was silly, entirely too literal, but given that the fight featured L...

Urban Meyer Is Still Insane For Tim Tebow And Won't Shut Up
Urban Meyer is delusional. The synapses in his brain are slowly failing to fire in the proper manner. Or maybe the aliens finally came for him. Those are the only explanations we can possibly give for why Meyer appears to be the last person on Earth who still thinks Tebow can make it in the NFL. Eve...

Scott Steiner Blasts The Current State Of Pro Wrestling
Grotesquely inflated WCW and WWE veteran Scott Steiner was one of the most mush-mouthed rambling interviews this side of the Ultimate Warrior, so it's something of a surprise to see his quotes in the Miami Herald on what he believes is the sorry state of pro wrestling. Whether he's right or not, he'...

Oklahoma State Avoids APR Penalties Thanks To Player From The 1990s
One of the NCAA's favorite weapons in its PR battle to classify amateur athletes as "student-athletes" is Academic Progress Rate, a formula which provides academic benchmarks programs must achieve to avoid penalties. How meaningless is APR? Oklahoma State football only managed to clear the bar by in...

Chris Archer Continues To Be Annoying And Hypocritical About David Ortiz
Rays pitcher Chris Archer is not backing down from his dumb criticism of David Ortiz's bat flip from Sunday's game. And this time, like a true Salty Old Baseball Man, Archer is name-dropping poor Hank Aaron to make his point....

High School Kid Pulls Off Free-Throw Line Dunk
This is Shelby McEwan, a high school player from Mississippi throwing down an honest-to-God free-throw line dunk. This isn't one of those fake-ass, one-foot-over-the-line dunks, either. It's the real deal....

News Anchors Reporting Plane Crash Can't Say "Ouagadougou"
Ouagadougou is the capital of Burkina Faso. It's also the origin of Air Algerie flight 5017, which crashed last week in Mali killing 118. With the disaster coming so soon after the MH17 tragedy, coverage of the crash in West Africa deserved high placement in local newscasts across the U.S.—and, in t...

Metta World Peace Is Still A Dude You Don't Want To Mess With
Metta World Peace may no longer be the terrifying NBA presence he once was—mostly because he's no longer in the NBA—but that doesn't mean that he's a guy you can fuck with at the Venice summer league. Two dudes found out as much while playing in a recent pick-up game with the former defensive player...

D.C. Station Remembers The Good Times, When Radio Guys Could Say "Fag"
WJFK, a CBS-owned sportstalker serving the D.C. market, made a big announcement last week. LaVar Arrington, the former Washington Redskins star and longtime co-host of the station's afternoon show, LaVar and Dukes, had moved to Los Angeles to join the NFL Network. Instead of hiring a big-name replac...

Gordon Ramsay's Kid Will Host A Cooking Show, For Some Reason
Gordon Ramsay, professional emotional abuser of reality-TV cooks, has a 12-year-old daughter named Tilly. And Tilly has an ambition: to indulge a 12-year-old's desire for fame and adoration in the hopes that a cooking show starring a pre-teen will goose a certain famous TV person's flagging busin...

Little Boy Eats It While Trying To Run With Commonwealth Games Marathon
The Commonwealth Games are underway in Scotland, as representatives from all the territories of the Queen's realm battle it out in athletic competitions both Olympic and non-Olympic. ...

ESPN's <em>First Take</em> Opens With Horseshit Apology From Stephen A. Smith
This morning's Very Special Edition of First Take began with a scripted and seemingly pre-recorded apology from panelist Stephen A. Smith regarding the very dumb things he said about domestic violence last week. It was ... unconvincing....

Troy Tulowitzki Went To A Yankees Game And Everyone's Freaking Out
Troy Tulowitzki will be in another uniform next year. That's not to impress you with my predictive abilities, or to rub it in for Rockies fans, or to make some kind of observation about small-market teams' inability to keep their homegrown stars. It's just a statement of fact. As in: the sun will co...

ESPN On Stephen A. Smith Firestorm: Tune In To <i>First Take</i> On Monday
ESPN has issued a response following Stephen A. Smith's rant on/enabling domestic violence from Friday's episode of First Take. Here it is, in full:...

Here's Frank Thomas's Emotional HOF Induction Speech
On the other end of the Hall-of-Fame-Speech spectrum, Frank Thomas gave a pretty touching speech today at the Hall of Fame and spent almost the entire time either crying or fighting off the tears. He spoke fondly of his parents and family and got very emotional when speaking about his father (whic...