ow Page 774 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Oxbox Won The Preakness Stakes, Apparently
Never heard of Oxbox. Better name than Oxbow, though. Better name, now that we think of it, than Itsmyluckyday and Mylute, too....

Golfer Hits Tee Shot Into A Bathroom, Sends Announcers Into Giggles
Yesterday in the quarterfinals of the Volvo World Match Play Championship, Nicolas Colsaerts hit a tee shot on a par-4 that flew off the course, over the rest area, and into a bathroom. Because the ball landed in a hazard, a rules official was summoned, who determined that the nearest "point of reli...

Singer Of National Anthem Forgets Words, Powers Ahead Anyhow
Listening to this instantly immortal rendition of "The Star-Spangled Banner," I'm reminded of Kevin Kline's character in "A Fish Called Wanda," who after receiving any sort of instruction always had to ask, "What was the part in the middle?"...

Oxbow Wins The 2013 Preakness Stakes
Oxbow won the 138th running of the Preakness Stakes this evening at the Pimlico Race Course in Baltimore. Oxbow led wire to wire, and the win was a feel-good story for the jockey, Gary Stevens. Stevens, 50, retired in 2005 and worked as an analyst. He returned this January....

Here's Jake "The Snake" Roberts Singing At Last Night's Braves Game
So last night the Atlanta Braves played the Dodgers. They won, which was expected. What wasn't expected was ex-professional wrestler Jake "The Snake" Roberts making a cameo to lead everyone in singing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" during the seventh-inning stretch. That's what happened, though....

The Astros Lost On A Moronic Walk-Off Error
"Looks like we're going to extra innings." That's what Greg Brown, the Pirates' TV broadcaster, said as soon as Russell Martin made contact on this fly ball to shallow right-center. But Brown should have known better. Because it ain't over till the Astros have finished tying all of their shoelaces t...

Tyron Smith Is Related To A Bunch Of Awful People Who Want His Money
You're Tyron Smith. You're drafted ninth overall, the first offensive lineman taken in 2011. You sign a rookie contract for $12.5 million. All you have to worry about is your family trying to bleed you dry....

Help! How Do I Get That Old-Man-Pee Smell Out Of My Bathroom?
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her....

How To Give A Best Man Toast That Doesn't Suck
We got this email the other day from reader Alex. It's the kind of email we get a lot round these parts:...

Brownsville Bum
Here's W.C. Heinz's classic True magazine story on Bummy Davis (Jimmy Breslin called it the best magazine story ever written):...


More Surgery For Rob Gronkowski, But This Time It's A Good Thing
Everyone grab a cheap beer and a college girl, because the Summer of Gronk is back on!...

Tennis Player Has Cameraman Help With Epic Tirade Against Chair Umpire
This video of Viktor Troicki's meltdown at the Italian Open goes on for four minutes, but be sure to watch it from beginning to end. It just keeps getting better and better....

How North Dakota Lost Its Mind Over A "Choke Job"
On Feb. 16, the Northern Arizona basketball team rallied to beat North Dakota in overtime, 74-72. In a postgame interview with North Dakota head coach Brian Jones, the team's radio guy, Paul Ralston, a university employee, called the loss a "choke job." What ensued was the most pitiful college sport...

George Maloof Chased Into A Closet
A person in charge of a professional sports franchise worth hundreds of millions of dollars ran away from reporters and tried to hide in a closet. That is the story you are currently reading. ...

Again: Bryce Harper's Misplay Was A Blooper, Not An Act Of Heroism
On the wide spectrum of people running face first into walls, Bryce Harper's crash the other night probably fell somewhere between Gus Frerotte and Larry, Curly, and Moe Howard. Harper is an enormously entertaining player who will do many amazing, effortful things in what we hope will be a very long...

Hawaii Puts The Rainbow Back In Warriors
Hawaii has abandoned a plan to neuter one of the best nicknames in college sports. For the first time in 13 years, Hawaii football—and the rest of the university's men's teams—will be the Rainbow Warriors....

Bryce Harper Wasn't Playing Hard Last Night, He Was Playing Dumb
The fact that Bryce Harper ran face-first into a wall last night is not a laughing matter. It was a scary moment that Harper came away from with a seriously rung bell, a gash under his chin, and a jammed shoulder. We are not going to laugh at Bryce Harper's injury....

Marquis Teague Tips Ball Into Own Basket, Exemplifies Bulls' Futility
This happened in the fourth quarter of last night's Heat-Bulls game, and it perfectly sums up the Bulls' Game 4 performance, which was like watching a bunch of dudes try to beat themselves to death with feather dusters....